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AIBU?

why do secondary DD or DS leave homework to last minute ?

16 replies

flickat · 17/10/2022 13:22

DD has just started secondary school and loves it. But despite being former teacher, putting out stuff hinting probably being naggy have you done your homework yet ? Its still a can you help me with art at 8.30 on a Sunday ? Art help no nothing at all. What is a technique no idea ? Its got colours. Google something. I dont know where your pencils went ? No Ive not eaten unlike you and all the snacks Ive no idea about this. Thank God pin interest board. There read that. Yes that pink blob thing is a shoe. No idea why. IYiy dont know. Ask your teacher. Why cant you help ? Its art my tree look like broccoli.

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flickat · 17/10/2022 16:39

I apologise for the grammar in this thread. It was very rushed. I am not in teaching Zero so you can breathe a sigh of relief. Thank you for your comments.

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Notanotherwindow · 17/10/2022 14:30

I did not follow that at all. Needs some punctuation and grammar to be understandable.

From your title I'm assuming they leave everything to last minute and want to be spoon fed everything?

Teens tend to live in the moment, their future planning and time management skills are pants at this age. Just leave it to them. If they don't get it done, let them get detention. They will soon learn that mum isn't their PA.

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HighlandPony · 17/10/2022 14:22

Not just high school. Primary too. I recently had a blow up with middles teacher over homework because he wasn’t bringing it home or taking it back and I’d just had a section with youngest so couldn’t take it in when demanded.

Im not big on homework anyway. I think it sets up bad habits. I’m forever on at the oh to leave work at work and not bring his work home to have a better work/life balance but I think we condition this mindset into folk as kids by piling in the homework.

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Kazzyhoward · 17/10/2022 14:17

It's not just teens. Lots of adults won't do things before the last possible moment either. It's a personality trait across all age groups.

Some people just want things done and dusted asap so do things as soon as they can.

Others work the opposite way and work backwards from a deadline, i.e. if the deadline is Friday 13th, they'd plan to do it on Thursday, and then often get caught out when something else crops up on Thursday meaning a last minute panic in limited time and a sub-optimal outcome. Even if they'd had days (or even weeks) to do it when they had plenty of free time, but chose to do other things (or nothing) when they had plenty of time!

I have loads of clients who do the latter. They drive me insane. I tell them of the deadlines, remind them, remind them again, etc., and then at the last minute, they run around like headless chickens trying to find missing information, complaining bitterly about everyone else who apparently hasn't sent them an invoice, or a bank statement or whatever (which they inevitable magically "find" after all!).

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Comedycook · 17/10/2022 14:09

I'm a massive procrastinator... sadly ds is too. In fact he was doing his history homework this morning at 7.45am. I have spoke to him over and over again. It's an age old problem I think.

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PinkHeadphones · 17/10/2022 14:04

I used to do/ finish my homework on the hour long bus journey on the way to school. Traffic jams were a massive bonus for me. My handwriting would start Ok then get wobbly as the bus bounced around.

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Sparklesocks · 17/10/2022 13:59

I guess partly the same reasons some adults will procrastinate when they have a big work deadline, or need to take a return back to M+S because they can only get a refund for another few days even though they’ve had weeks!

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WutheredOut · 17/10/2022 13:54

We try to get all homework done either the day it is set or by Saturday evening so that Sunday is a rest day for everyone (including me!)

I keep track of what homework has been set so I can remind DD what she stills needs to do - it’s all on Google classroom so I can log on as DD to check

Saturday evening is film night and pizza but only if all homework is done

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BogRollBOGOF · 17/10/2022 13:48

The night before it's due in is pretty early... I favoured getting up early on the day it was due in. Focused the mind beautifully. I did well at school!

If I do stuff too far in advance, I forget it and tend to end up with a worse pickle than having it fresh in mind at the point its relevant. It also stops me drifting off at tangents.

DS is ND... I suspect he may not be the only one in the family...

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celestialsphere · 17/10/2022 13:44

Some people procrastinate and do things at the last minute and some people do things straight away. Different personalities.

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Thistooshallpsss · 17/10/2022 13:41

My children had a two week timetable and they were free to do homework as they wished but any homework outstanding had to be completed straight after lunch on Sunday regardless of when it had to be handed in. This seemed on the whole to work and prevented it piling upon a random week day.

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DelurkingAJ · 17/10/2022 13:35

It’s pretty character driven, I think. DS1 (10) does homework on the day it’s given or maybe Saturday morning, stresses if he’s got anything to do come Sunday afternoon (even though it’s due on Tuesday). DS2 (6) has to be prodded, poked and cajoled, which takes longer than doing the homework would have done in the first place. I am currently trying to train DS2 into ‘get it out the way and then you can enjoy the weekend’ with mixed success. I know which child is going to have 10pm homework drama at secondary.

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balalake · 17/10/2022 13:31

It's not just children that leave things to the last minute. Hope you can somehow find a way forward, as time management and planning are valuable skills in the workplace.

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yerdaindicatesonbends · 17/10/2022 13:31

I’m going to be honest. I did not follow at all.

As to your title, I did all homework last minute or not at all in HS. And I still did great academically. It was a 50/50 split as to whether teachers despised me or understood I would do work that NEEDED to be done, and I was ok with that.

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onionringcheeseypuff · 17/10/2022 13:29

So they lack organising and time management skills

I do too

It can be from a neurological Condition such as ADHD but also just some peoples personality is just that they need more help with this And it's surely not uncommon in most teenagers who think they have better things to be doing 😂

why do secondary DD or DS leave homework to last minute ?
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ZeroFuchsGiven · 17/10/2022 13:26

I get what you are saying by the title but are you sure you are a former teacher? Confused

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