Penis on neighbours wall- WWYD

[Pinksqr]

I live in what is known in my town as quite a “posh area”, it’s kind of a large cul de sac. Really not trying to sound snotty but just want to give a background on the area so it makes sense how odd this is.

About 8 months ago one of my neighbours had his house “graffitied” with a very very large penis on the front of it. We were all mortified but the neighbour just laughed it off. We presumed he would just contact the police and get it covered up and that would be the end of it.

For the first few weeks we kept bringing it up to said neighbour about when he was going to get it covered up, and a host of excuses was said which at the time sounded believable. Think along the lines of “police want to come check it out to gather evidence etc” “decorator was due to come today but was sick.

Fast forward 8 months and it is STILL there, the neighbours have all offered to pay for it, keep nagging for it gone. I absolutely hate it, every-time I drive home from work it’s the first thing you can see. It makes the whole street look so run down. One neighbour has had their house for sale and every viewer has mentioned it. Im so embarrassed when friends and family come over and it’s what they see.

basically if he’s refusing to get it covered up removed where do we go from here? Has anyone experienced similar. I know it’s such a first world problem but coming out of my house and seeing a huge penis is just horrible. Also I know it’s his property but it’s not exactly a butterfly surely there would be rules protecting against this if it’s an inappropriate item.

[TERFwithAcat]

Could he be being forced to sell the house (divorce etc) and is deliberately trying to put buyers off?

[Minimalme]

Is your neighbour OLD atm op? Is it possible he is telling suitors he has a big dick and this is the only way to make that statement true?

Please don't stand in the way of him finding a new lady friend.

[TimeFlysWhenYoureHavingRum]

Maybe it's a Banksy? Neighbour may be waiting to get it valued. It may actually improve your property's value?

[DeadbeatYoda]

Totally, picture or it didn't happen! 😁

[TERFwithAcat]

Please show us a picture OP!

[5128gap]

Your local Public Environmental Nuisance Information Strategy document might be a useful read too OP.

[scotscorner]

@NoSquirrels

Contact your local community policing team. They’ll have a word.

@NoSquirrels is right. You might also be interested in looking at s5 of the Public Order Act 1986 if you want to get police involved.

[Rosscameasdoody]

@Chowbellow

Maybe he's a dickhead?

This comes a close second !!

[Rosscameasdoody]

@5128gap

Given the apparent difficulties some men have in controlling the limited range of movement their penis already has, I suspect if they also had wings, it may be in no one's interests.
Although perhaps a little extra lift at times may be of benefit to some.

Puts me in mind of the episode of South Park - Mr Garrisons penis, grown on the back of a mouse, doing a runner and ending up singing in the moonlight !!

[EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall]

@Vecnasnurse

Ta-da!

Fucking hell 🤣🤣

[Rosscameasdoody]

@oakleaffy

Cul de Ballsack?

👏👏👏 You win the thread !!

[5128gap]

@TittleTattleOh

It’s a Penis, not a Sanitary Towel.

Given the apparent difficulties some men have in controlling the limited range of movement their penis already has, I suspect if they also had wings, it may be in no one's interests.
Although perhaps a little extra lift at times may be of benefit to some.

[Vallmo47]

LMFAO.

Thank You OP.

[Chowbellow]

Maybe he's a dickhead?

[Rosscameasdoody]

@StrikeandRobin

Wait until the neighbour is at work and go over to scrub it off/paint over it with some of the other neighbours? Just collectively deny all knowledge when he asks who’s done it!

Very bad idea with all the CCTV and ring cameras around - it’s a nap someone will catch you and then it’s trespass and god knows what else !!

[winewolfhowls]

You could turn it into a tasteful picture of Peppa Pig?

[Metabigot]

@JaneJeffer

it’s not exactly a butterfly
Can you add wings?

You, my friend, win mumsnet today.

[DrawingdowntheMoon]

@GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER Just for you,

www.thescottishsun.co.uk/news/scottish-news/6666112/scotland-snow-penis-rude-trend/

[Ihatemyroad]

JaneJeffer · Today 17:41
it’s not exactly a butterfly

Can you add wings?

🤣🤣🤣

[TittleTattleOh]

@JaneJeffer

it’s not exactly a butterfly
Can you add wings?

It’s a Penis, not a Sanitary Towel.

[GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER]

During a snowy spell, a few days running on his way to work, dh drove past a massive snow-willy - complete with snow-balls - on a roundabout.

I was seriously miffed that he never got a photo of it - nowhere to stop on a busy road in the rush hour - before it succumbed to terminal erectile dysfunction because of the thaw. 🙁

[winewolfhowls]

I think we need a diagram

[moita]

@Sweetpeasaremadeforbees

Am I the only one who thought the title meant an amputated penis lying on the top of a wall? My mind boggled.

Same or a dildo.

[winewolfhowls]

Your neighbour 100% drew the nob himself and is enjoying the effect.

Don't protest too much or it might grow massive hairy balls.

[CheapBeersFilledwithCrocodileTears]

@oakleaffy

Cul de Ballsack?

@oakleaffy Thread winner