To refuse to kiss 70 animals a day?

[DueyCheatemAndHow]

DS has slowly got into cuddly toys more and more. It got to the point where he had some on his shelf and some in his bed and he wanted me to kiss them goodnight, so I did.

But now he is insisting on having all of them in his bed. There's at least 35 if not 40. And he has a nap as well - so they both need two kisses a day.

Am I being a total bitch to refuse to kiss that many soft toys? He was 3 in September.

[QueenLagertha]

Awww he sounds so cute 🥰 DS is nearly 4 and has built up quite the collection of teddies. He takes as many as he can carry down with him in the morning and we are given instructions not to sit on the teddies sofa. At night they have to be tucked down the side of the bed and at the bottom in a particular order. His two favourites get to sleep either side of him. Theres barely any room for him in the bed

[Newnamefor2022]

@girlmom21

You're a better person than me because they'd be discretely disappearing one by one in my house.

How does he fit in the bed with that many soft toys?

No!!!!! The horror!

[WineIsAFruitRight]

I'm so glad this isn't just me OP! I swear every night DS adds in a new "essential" part to his night time routine and if we don't comply it's uncontrollable hysterics. I'm torn between just getting the bloody requests out the way vs putting my foot down. Last night he wanted to count all the numbers on his clock as he'd forgotten and it was already way past bedtime so I said no. This resulted in him becoming so upset he stopped breathing and passed out (it's something he can't control but thankfully happens rarely now). Didn't I feel like a bitch.... just hoping these things start to ease off and become less important as he gets older. Wine also helps I find

[ClareBlue]

25, I think

[ClareBlue]

I've just done 30 in less than a minute (yes I have at least 30). Is it that big a deal. He'll soon grow out of it, probably. I did by the time I was

[PinkSyCo]

Aww this is soo cute. Just be proud and grateful that you have such a sweet and loving little boy and pucker up OP you bad toy fur baby mama you!

[Prettybubblesintheair]

Bless him. He sounds very sweet. I really would just kiss the teddies! It doesn’t take long, it makes him happy and it’s not going to last forever! I have 4 kids, ranging from 10-18 years old and I miss the toddler quirks!

[Doorhandleghost]

Oh this made me lol, reminded me of happy memories of soft toy loving DD at that age. I was required to sing them all a special sleepy song as well as kisses for all gazillion of them!

Eventually I said special bunny gets song/kiss, one other teddy gets song/kiss and everyone else gets a “sleep well everyone!” with general room wide kiss blowing. This still continues today, she is 10.

Special bunny and teddy of the day (they take turns, it’s all very equitable) also like to have conversations with me at bedtime, it’s bloody lovely and I’ll miss it when it stops.

[Georgeskitchen]

YABU, Those teddies all need a 💋😘

[CovoidOfAllHumanity]

It really doesn't last for ever at all
DD is a grumpy teen now and gradually reduced from a whole enormous collection which had to be lined up in the exact correct order, to only 3 favourites and last time I helped her change her bed I noticed that even her very special favourite cuddly that she's loved since she was 4 has been relegated to the bedside table now
End of an era.

[ThinWomansBrain]

can't you tell him they like it best if you kiss them after he's gone to sleep?

[VestaTilley]

Oh don’t be mean; their cuddly toys mean so much at that age. My DS adores his.

Just say you’ll give one kiss then he can share kisses out to the rest. This phase will pass soon enough.

[Summerfun54321]

Tell him some of them are going off on an imaginary holiday to a far flung destination! Get him to help you choose which ones and where they’re going, then you could ask him to imagine what they’re up to on their holiday at bedtime rather than you having to kiss them all (knowing full well they’re stuffed into a cupboard somewhere!). Then rotate and send different ones off on holiday.

[CovoidOfAllHumanity]

I don't just have to kiss the buggers I have to give them all imaginary bottles and rusks (apart from the koalas because they obviously can only have eucalyptus)
Best nip it in the bud or you'll end up like me having to do a whole 15 minute made up ritual for each child.
Unless I am feeling generous I limit it to only 3 animals per night for the bedtime ritual or I'd be there all night.

[DueyCheatemAndHow]

That made me properly snort

[Thegreymethod]

When I first read your post I read it as 'dh' then couldn't concentrate on the rest of the post because I was just thinking this is the strangest thing I've ever heard...... Ive got no advice but at least it's your son and not your husband I suppose!

[ArabellaScott]

[quote DueyCheatemAndHow]@Prettybubblesintheair it really doesn't, I have to say "night night x' then kiss them!

Tonight he said to me 'I'm so scared to go to bed cos of the lions and monsters but the moon will protect me won't it mummy? And you will be right downstairs. And I have my animals'.[/quote]
Bless his little soft-animal-protected heart.

[Scrabblecrabapple]

I would say….
Mummy can do the magic rain kiss. Do you want to see?
-kiss up in the air and use hands to Mimic the kiss going up in the air and raining down on all the toys (and kissing them) all in one go.
Only mummy can do this because she is special.

I just made that up btw it’s not a thing. I am quite useful at making up bullshit on the spot to pacify the annoying demands of toddlers.

[DueyCheatemAndHow]

@Prettybubblesintheair it really doesn't, I have to say "night night x' then kiss them!

Tonight he said to me 'I'm so scared to go to bed cos of the lions and monsters but the moon will protect me won't it mummy? And you will be right downstairs. And I have my animals'.

[Prettybubblesintheair]

Oh my god just kiss the damn animals! It takes about a second to kiss a teddy, that’s 35 seconds twice a day to make your son happy. Is that really so awful? Considering how long we spend wiping their little arses 30 seconds of kissing cuddlies sounds like bliss!

[Gymrats]

Kiss your hand and blow it, that way they all get a kiss in one go!

[ArabellaScott]

@DueyCheatemAndHow

So I went in with my compromise

And left having kissed every last fucking one.

New strategy - siphon off the ones he doesn't give a shite about

Heartless!

[Porcupineintherough]

@stingofthebutterfly

Stop the nap and you've halved your problem. Why does he need a nap at 3?

[Invasionofthegutsnatchers]

My 8 year old boy was always into his cuddles but over lockdown and moving up to juniors with very little transition he has become really attached to them. There's his top one, then the next three, then the next tier of about 5, then probably 8 more. He carries them about the house, from the sofa to the bathroom to watch him have a bath then to bed. It's very sweet.

[HP87]

We have a soft toy one in one out policy. Whenever she picks one up in a shop I ask which one she's getting rid of to make space, she soon puts it back! You need to start this soon!!