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AIBU?

To think this was not called for.

45 replies

CA0932017 · 17/01/2022 14:59

Back story. There's been a major outbreak of covid in Dd's class since going back to school after Christmas. Most of the class tested positive the first week back, last weekend a few this week just gone by. All but 5 or so have tested positive. Mostly mild.some are back today or tomorrow.

Dd had covid early December and was told she'd unlikely get it again so soon. I did however do a couple lft's on her in the last week which were negative, she has been in school last week as that's what's expected as she's symptom free.

She complained of a sore throat last night, did an lft was which was very faint but there. Stronger today with cold like symptoms. She's got it again for sure 😪

Anyway Dd has a close friend in the same class that has also escaped the dreaded covid - so far. But her mum has not been testing her, just looking for our symptoms which is fine!

Anyway, we met up for a walk with her friend on Saturday. Fast forward to Sunday, I told her friends mum about the positive lft and she's got shitty saying how we've put them at the risk. We couldn't predict that Dd would get it again so soon. I'm negative so far!

Firstly - they are in the same bloody class so hugely likely her friend could get it from school anyway. Dd has clearly got it from school after the outbreak. Also, dd's friend could have it for all she knows. She hasn't tested her. Dd was totally asymptomatic last month, wouldn't have known without testing. Both me and dp had it and she got to the tail end of our isolation before testing positive. Thought she had missed until we did her last planned lft!!

So aibu to think it's inappropriate to get shitty with me over all this? They were together all day on Friday at school anyway. Saturday made little difference. We were outside too!

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saraclara · 17/01/2022 19:12

@Fittleswade

I think she's probably crumbling under the relentless ghastliness of it all. We all know the logic here, but there's a fatigue, and she didn't handle it well. But honestly, leave her alone. We're all fighting a battle here.

She isn't though, is she? If she saw it as a battle, she'd be testing her kid when she was sent home symptomatic.
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Fittleswade · 17/01/2022 18:44

I think she's probably crumbling under the relentless ghastliness of it all. We all know the logic here, but there's a fatigue, and she didn't handle it well. But honestly, leave her alone. We're all fighting a battle here.

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saraclara · 17/01/2022 18:40

Have you seen how hard it is to get LFTs?

It isn't. They've been available from the website for getting on for two weeks now. Last week they were giving them out outside my supermarket, at the next village's outdoor market, and there's a stash at our library.

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saraclara · 17/01/2022 18:34

Plus her child got sent home feeling tired and headache last week. School couldn't force a test as not the main three. She was back e next day

So it was okay for her to potentially put YOUR kid at risk? This woman is clearly devoid of any rational thinking.

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x2boys · 17/01/2022 18:08

@SuspiciousHumanoid

Yep, my nephew has had it twice in the last six weeks as well, mild symptoms both times. DS’s friend has had it twice since Christmas, mild symptoms both times. It’s just a Covid merry-go-round at the moment.

God that's quick my oldest has had it twice ,but first time last July ,second time just before Xmas ,I thought he would be ok for a few months at least ,better keep up with the LFT,s;
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CA0932017 · 17/01/2022 18:00

@Oldraver

So what did you say to her
when she was shitty ?

Not a huge deal. Not in the right frame of mine for any argument - I'm not argumentative anyway. I just said we weren't to know and they were in school together all last week anyway so makes little difference imo. They would have had closer contact at school inside as well, then they would on the short walk! Left it at that now!
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Oldraver · 17/01/2022 17:55

So what did you say to her
when she was shitty ?

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thenightsky · 17/01/2022 17:43

@JugglingJanuary

Tell the mad bat, her UNTESTED daughter is just have likely to have given it to your DD.

Yes. This.
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CA0932017 · 17/01/2022 17:33

@Hertsgirl10

You can test positive up to 90 days after having covid so she might not even have it, one of mine was having negative lateral flows one said positive then negative.
PCR was negative.

In our case I think she has it again. I've spoken to 119 and who have confirmed to treat it as a true positive, there's many being reinfected. Dd has new symptoms - albeit mild. She's been recently exposed to 20 odd covid cases in school too. Just seems likely she's got it! 🤷‍♀️
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Hertsgirl10 · 17/01/2022 17:03

You can test positive up to 90 days after having covid so she might not even have it, one of mine was having negative lateral flows one said positive then negative.
PCR was negative.

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TyrannosaurusRegina · 17/01/2022 17:02

@Gunpowder

Aarghhhh YANBU OP. DD has just recovered from her second bout of Covid (she had Delta in the Autumn) and one her friends (whose mum has told me before that she doesn’t test her children) keeps making remarks about DD ‘always having Covid’. It’s so annoying that you are made to feel guilty when actually you are being responsible by a) testing and b) isolating.

I'd be saying 'well yours could very well have had it aa well however you'd never know as you never test!'
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TyrannosaurusRegina · 17/01/2022 17:01

Wait, you went for a walk with her on the saturday, but didn't get a positive till the Sunday? Am I understanding that correctly? If so then you're not bloody psychic, you weren't to know that you would get a positive lft the day after meeting her.

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Gunpowder · 17/01/2022 17:00

Aarghhhh YANBU OP. DD has just recovered from her second bout of Covid (she had Delta in the Autumn) and one her friends (whose mum has told me before that she doesn’t test her children) keeps making remarks about DD ‘always having Covid’. It’s so annoying that you are made to feel guilty when actually you are being responsible by a) testing and b) isolating.

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blyn · 17/01/2022 17:00

@DustyMaiden

Her DM made the choice to meet up. Her problem. As you say they were in school anyway.

I agree with that. Friend's mum is being unreasonable but she will realise that when she has a think.
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CA0932017 · 17/01/2022 16:50

Thanks all. She seems to have the thought process that she doesn't want to follow the guidelines, test or have to isolate or anything but everyone else has to! 🤷‍♀️ Ironically her younger child spend the whole on our walk coughing. I know kids cough, mine have had plenty of non covid coughs since this all began but I know she likely hasn't tested him. She says he gets a bad cough every year so it's not covid.. I get it, I do as mine gets coughs but I've always tested them when needed!

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BluebellsGreenbells · 17/01/2022 16:21

I would say when there’s an outbreak and you have a few not testing then it’s more likely to untested are spreading it.

I think you should mention that!

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CA0932017 · 17/01/2022 15:58

@Forrandomposts

Any chance she misunderstood and thinks you've have a positive pcr, ie thinks you knew on Saturday that it was possible?

No she definitely knows the difference. We have since done a pcr though.. despite that 119 told us not to. Her line yesterday was so faint so we thought it was best!
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CA0932017 · 17/01/2022 15:57

@ShouldIStaySelfIsolated

One of the kids in an extracurricular class that DD does had a headache last week for a few hours. Her mum did an LFT as a precaution and she was shocked it twas positive... that was literally the only symptom, a headache for a few hours. Your kid's friend had it last week for sure

Headache is definitely a sign! Dp had the worse headache imaginable with it - he usually gets migraines anyway! It floored him!
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sparepantsandtoothbrush · 17/01/2022 15:55

[quote PeonyAndSweetpea]@sparepantsandtoothbrush - ummm....just because someone chooses not to test doesn't mean another person should also not test. Your logic is flawed. [/quote]
ummm... you've misunderstood what I said!

I mean the other mum is a hypocrite if she's expecting others to do tests before meeting up if she's not doing them. Plus the OP is under no obligation to test her daughter within 90 days of having covid anyway

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Foolsrule · 17/01/2022 15:55

Tell her your DD was testing negative before the meet up, hence you actually think it came from her!

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ShouldIStaySelfIsolated · 17/01/2022 15:51

One of the kids in an extracurricular class that DD does had a headache last week for a few hours. Her mum did an LFT as a precaution and she was shocked it twas positive... that was literally the only symptom, a headache for a few hours. Your kid's friend had it last week for sure

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ElliotGoss · 17/01/2022 15:50

@PeonyAndSweetpea

It's a case of six or two threes really. Friend is a overreacting, but there may be a reason for it that is unknown to you.

However, I do think you and your DD should have done a LFT yesterday before meeting people......it may still have shown negative (who knows) but I just think if you're meeting people outside of your household or going somewhere busy, there is no harm in taking a LFT before you go.

Personally I'd inwardly sigh, roll my eyes and distance myself from the mum as I'd consider her a bit batty.

Have you seen how hard it is to get LFTs?
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AryaStarkWolf · 17/01/2022 15:45

What an idiot, anyone she comes in contact with could test positive, you're not psychic and if she's that worried she needs to stay away from people full stop

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PeonyAndSweetpea · 17/01/2022 15:42

@sparepantsandtoothbrush - ummm....just because someone chooses not to test doesn't mean another person should also not test. Your logic is flawed.

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Sparklfairy · 17/01/2022 15:41

Is she one of those that buries her head in the sand and thinks "if you don't test, you don't have it"? A lot of people don't want the fallout that comes with a positive test, whether that's cancelling plans or time off work, so just avoid testing.

If the DD went home feeling ill the other day your DD could have caught it from her as much as anyone from school.

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