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To ask the worst behaviour at Christmas you’ve witnessed by an adult?
612

SoniaFouler · 05/12/2021 18:58

Mine is:

Drunk cousin (24 at the time) shouting and arguing with everyone for most of Boxing Day three years ago, then topped it off when someone told her to stop being stupid by standing up and scraping the entire contents of her dinner plate all over the table and made my aunt cry.

OP's posts:
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Ddot · 08/12/2021 22:12

Woke up Christmas day feeling odd, went to my mams early with husband and his face (he didn't like my family). Then went to his mothers for the rest of the day. As time ticked by I felt more and more unwell. About 4 I asked husband if we could go home as I was now in pain. He shouted and hissed at me saying I had spoilt his Christmas being so miserable, at this point I was hunched in a ball on the floor, he said to go home on my own, which meant walking two mile. He took me home about 9 in the evening. Turned out I had flu and it took me three weeks to get back on my feet. The house was a complete shit tip as he refused to do any sort of house work. Prick left moldy pots in the kitchen waiting for me. I lived on toast and tinned soup for a week. Oh he is my ex husband now.

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SchadenfreudePersonified · 08/12/2021 20:43

@Laila747*, not 2Laila747

Sorry

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SchadenfreudePersonified · 08/12/2021 20:42

I haven’t spoken to his rancid ditch pig of a mother since. (and my DC hate her now too)

Normally I would try to encourage separated parents to bury personal resentments and to encourage children to still love and respect their grandparents on both sides, but in the case of your in-laws - esp MIL - I absolutely agree with you 100% 2laila747

That's a bliddy HORRIBLE thing to do to a child - any child. If I had a completely strange child in the house I would ensure they got a present, but for a child of the family (which your DD was), to single her out like this was beyond cruel.

Your in-laws, and your ex, are total tw*ts!

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ChannelLightVessel · 08/12/2021 19:38

@Fluffycloudland77

I wonder if other religions have these problems too at their major celebrations.

Having spent several years in the US, I think part of the problem in this country is that it’s the one big holiday of the year, so everything has to be ‘perfect’. In the States, Thanksgiving is the extended family/big meal holiday, while Christmas is more about presents/seasonal treats (eg gingerbread, lights etc), so there isn’t the same focus on doing everything at the same time. And some people prefer to do their big family meet-up for the 4th of July.
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AnnieSnap · 08/12/2021 17:48

Regarding conflict at gatherings in other religions, of course there will be conflicts, but alcohol is often part of the worse behaviours, as it is disinhibiting!

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MaHBroon · 08/12/2021 17:07

@Fluffycloudland77

I wonder if other religions have these problems too at their major celebrations.

I’m told Eid can be interesting in one family members home but it’s never because of alcohol and I wonder if that makes it worse as what else could you blame a Barney on.

Bottom line is that wherever there are people in the world there’s a chance of a Barney.
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AnnieSnap · 08/12/2021 15:54

@MrsBobDylan

I'm sorry *@AnnieSnap and @Justilou1* - some people shouldn't be allowed to have children.

It's sad when you think of women who couldn't have kids who could have loved us.

I always feel like a lost child because nobody really loved me, so I didn't bring the sort of joy that I have experienced as a Mum.

It is a bit like I arrived with a present but my parents didn't want it. It's one of the reasons I love making my kids happy - it makes me feel like I'm giving that gift.

I'm glad to hear you both didn't attend the funerals and that it felt 'ok'. I won't go to my Mum's - it would feel fake and even with her lying in a coffin, she would still make me feel afraid. If anyone could come back from the dead, it would be her!

My mother always said that if I ever let her go into a care home, she’d come back and haunt me. I did and it’s about 9/10 years since she died (it’s not been on my radar enough to be sure) and she hasn’t made an appearance yet!
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carolineal · 08/12/2021 15:28

Quite a few Christmases with my brother drinking or on pain meds - they were fairly hairy. He is now dead (due to the above!).

However, one funny Christmas when we were kids... it was when VHS video players came out. My brother got given a brand new VHS video. I think he would have been about 11. I was 8 and got given a copy of the Children's Bible. Pretty much figured out where I stood in my mother's eyes from that day forwards!!!

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IggyAce · 08/12/2021 15:07

I’m so sorry to those that suffered horrific Christmas’s, some of them made me cry.
Mine are mild in comparison but one awful Christmas was when dd age 2 threw up in the car Christmas Eve travelling back from my aunts. She was just starting to get Christmas and had been excited, however she was miserable and tired on Christmas Day.

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SchadenfreudePersonified · 08/12/2021 14:00

@UsernameInTheTown

My DSIS37 always forgets that she is vegan at Christmas and DSIS43 forgets she has 'allergies' as they both enthusiastically dig in to the trifle. Undermining the trifle, in order to snaffle more of the sherry and fruit soaked sponge, leaving the custard, cream and peach slices in a precarious Jenga style avalanche hazard. This disgusting behaviour has resulted in many a Christmas Day spat and once an all out flounce in DP's house

Frankly, I'd stopmaking trifle.
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TwinMama6 · 08/12/2021 13:18

@SallyWebsterr

When I was 19 I was dating a 22 year old guy whose mother was very involved. We had been together around 2 years at this point so it wasnt a new relationship. He was a much wanted only child (and still lived at home until he was 36). He invited me over on Christmas night and I arrived, after both our families had eaten dinner, at 7pm. She threw a massive strop because he gave me a necklace and he didnt get her one. He had already given her gifts earlier in the day but started banging things round and then had a very loud row with her husband in the kitchen about why "SHE" (me) had to come round and then debated why I had to even exist at all and how she wished I didn't. Odd thing was we got on great 99% of the time but whenever she felt I was getting something she wasnt or her sons attention she would go mental. I instantly made my excuses and tried to leave but BF & his dad convinced me to stay by saying it would cause a bigger atmosphere if I left. She then began to say it would be best if she kept hold on the necklace for safe keeping incase I lost it and, if I wanted to wear it for an occasion, I could just ask her for it. We then sat and watched a film. Her and him on one couch and me on the other next to his DF.

What!!!!!
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TwinMama6 · 08/12/2021 13:06

@sjxoxo

My younger brother, about 24 years old- came home from pub on Xmas eve, absolutely, totally pissed. Went for a wee in the downstairs loo, came out with no trousers or pants on, proceeded to march into the lounge where my parents, our 2 sets of elderly very proper Grandparents, some neighbours, and a couple of my parents friends, we’re all sat eating choccies and chit chatting.
Brother didn’t seem to notice everyone at all; got a handful of choccies and spent 30 seconds looking in various plug sockets for his phone charger, bearing all!!!!!

No one said a word, apart from my Grandad who is like an elderly version of Mr Carson from Downton Abbey: “I think we can all agree that women are by far the fairer sex. Men really are ugly beings.”

Haha!! X

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂
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MrsBobDylan · 08/12/2021 12:35

I'm sorry @AnnieSnap and @Justilou1 - some people shouldn't be allowed to have children.

It's sad when you think of women who couldn't have kids who could have loved us.

I always feel like a lost child because nobody really loved me, so I didn't bring the sort of joy that I have experienced as a Mum.

It is a bit like I arrived with a present but my parents didn't want it. It's one of the reasons I love making my kids happy - it makes me feel like I'm giving that gift.

I'm glad to hear you both didn't attend the funerals and that it felt 'ok'. I won't go to my Mum's - it would feel fake and even with her lying in a coffin, she would still make me feel afraid. If anyone could come back from the dead, it would be her!

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Happy1982ish · 08/12/2021 12:29

Christmas is so over-rated.
I do love the decorations and the buzz, but the day itself never lives up to the hype.

It does for me. Single parent with two children
Absolute wonderful day.
No tension, not MILs having tantrums or DH’s not pulling their weight etc

It’s not the family image of Christmas you see in the adverts

But it’s a million times happier than the ones I’ve read about on mumsnet most of the time

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Happy1982ish · 08/12/2021 12:26

@Fluffycloudland77

I wonder if other religions have these problems too at their major celebrations.

As far as i know
Family tensions, arguments, disagreements, divorces etc aren’t limited to Christianity!
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HoseMeDownWithHolyWater · 08/12/2021 10:06

It's obviously not as appalling as most of these stories but my MIL sat with a face like a smacked arse after opening our present for her. She was clearly pissed off about it as when other people said how lovely it was (it was a cardigan) she just didn't respond. It was so awkward and childlike and she remained that way until she left.

The next day she opened a present from her other son. She squealed in delight and clapped her hands. It was a fucking reed diffuser. 🤣

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Fluffycloudland77 · 08/12/2021 09:53

I wonder if other religions have these problems too at their major celebrations.

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toastywarm · 08/12/2021 04:45

this is why last Christmas locked down was lovely.

Keep it simple and stay in and avoid the politics.

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LuckyPaws88 · 08/12/2021 04:42

Jesus she sounds like an absolute coo.

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BobbieT1999 · 08/12/2021 02:05

Nothing dramatic...an adult cousin having a very teenage strop and sulk because they didn't get their preferred seat at the table Grin

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AnnieSnap · 08/12/2021 01:33

@Justilou1 mine wasn’t physically violent, she was psychologically abusive, probably unintentionally, as she was batshit crazy. She lived in her own reality.

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ThumbWitchesAbroad · 08/12/2021 01:09

Christmas is so over-rated.
I do love the decorations and the buzz, but the day itself never lives up to the hype.

I'm so sorry for all of the traumas that have been posted on here - just heartbreaking, some of them, especially @DimplesToadfoot and @Maddiemoosmum0203 (the most horrifying) but everyone else who had to suffer horrendous behaviour from people who are supposed to care for/about them.

Our Christmases were usually ok but Mum would create an atmosphere of tension, and no one was allowed to open presents until she was ready to be there. Things improved after I'd moved out - I used to work night shift Christmas Eve, then go over around 10am and the FIRST thing I would do was give her a sherry. She wasn't at all a drinker, it never made her drunk, but it did take the edge off her stress levels.

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Justilou1 · 08/12/2021 00:58

@AnnieSnap & @MrsBobDylan I also had a crazy, violent mother. At her funeral, I could have happily played “Ding Dong the Witch is Dead” from the Wizard of Oz.
I am still traumatized years later. Will never forgive my dad either for alternately hiding behind her or using her as an excuse.

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AnnieSnap · 08/12/2021 00:51

I understand @MrsBobDylan I had a crazy mother too. I have moved on from it all emotionally, so I don’t want to bring it all up, but I totally get it. I used to wonder how I’d feel when I heard that she’d died. That happened several years ago now and I felt nothing. I didn’t go to the funeral.

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MrsBobDylan · 08/12/2021 00:17

Thanks @AnnieSnap - one emigrated to the other side of the world (the youngest) and the other went n/c with our Mum in March.

We are close and have been able to support each other. My eldest sibling is still stuck in the family dynamic and there is lots of tension there. She feels we have left her with having to care for our Mum and won't talk about the abuse.

She was the golden child so I think is more drawn into it all. I have no love left for my Mum, just fear. I am terrified of her just turning up on my doorstep again.

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