Threads

See more results

Topics

Usernames

Mumsnet Logo
Please
or
to access all these features

CMS are shit. How do I prove my children are at home 5 nights?
106

Mumof3almost4 · 10/05/2021 11:22

Ex has said he has shared care of kids, he claims he has them 3 nights. He does not he has them 1/2. This has drastically reduced maintenance.
I appealed and they said I have not proved that they are at home so many nights. How the fucking he'll do I prove they stay at home at least 5 nights? Send pics of them in their beds?!
I have to appeal at tribunal, please advise what you'd do??

OP's posts:
Please
or
to access all these features

Mumof3almost4 · 10/05/2021 11:36

Thanks so much for the replies. I will ask what they accept as proof.
What makes it worse is that they are both in high school, he has made them record a video saying they stay 3 nights, they've done it to keep him happy. I hate him with a passion for doing this.
CMS suggested a court order but I don't want to do this as the kids are fully aware and it's even more aggro

OP's posts:
Please
or
to access all these features

Iquitit · 10/05/2021 11:34

Could you ask them what they constitute as proof?
You could go ahead and get all sorts of evidence and then find out that it's not the right type or something, which would be awful.
Annoys the hell out of me that you have to prove they're at home and he doesn't have to prove they're at his, just because he said so. Bloody ridiculous.
Sorry you're going through this.

Please
or
to access all these features

CuriousaboutSamphire · 10/05/2021 11:31

First remind them that he should also have to prove his version of events and that they need to tell you precisely what evidence they will accept.

Specifics, not woolly statement.

Ask them. By phone, text, email, Twitter anything and everything you can think of.

Because at the moment they are taking his word for it, they reduced maintenance based in his word. Everyday sexism, misogyny etc etc. Did they follow their own rules?

www.nidirect.gov.uk/articles/shared-care-child-maintenance-cases


Meantime start a diary of days/nights he has them. Backdate it for a month or so, as far as you can be accurate.

And best of luck proving he is lying!

Throw everything at them!

Please
or
to access all these features

PinkMice · 10/05/2021 11:31

Ask them what they accept as proof.

Please
or
to access all these features

DrSbaitso · 10/05/2021 11:29

Urgh. Can the school confirm you're on the school run those days, or do you have a homework/reading diary that you signed to prove they were with you? Date stamped photos/photos with dated metadata?

Sorry if these are stupid suggestions for whatever reason, I don't have experience of this but I'm trying to help.

Please
or
to access all these features

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 10/05/2021 11:23

Christ I’ve no idea but just wanted to sympathise.

How shitting some men are, lying to avoid paying for their kids. And how shitty the system is to put the onus on you!

Please
or
to access all these features
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.