Not a stealth brag... Tips on raising an exceptionally beautiful child.

[Trytrytryasimight]

I know. I'm cringing at the thread title too.

I'm absolutely average, so is her dad. She happens to have an aunt who is an outlier in their family that looks like Claudia schiffer, and seems to have inherited all of her looks from her.

She's all rosy cheeks enormous green eyes and a mass of curly blond hair that never seems disheveled. She chooses her own clothes, keeps them nicely and puts them together so she looks fabulous every time. She is that child and this is through no effort of my own - I was more of an awkward indie kid through my tweens and teens. I can see other girls want to be her friend cause she's fun and kind but then look decidedly jeolous and irritated at dds clothes, hair, general oh wow look I'm so perfect and yet so pretty unspoken general vibe.
She's 12 and we've noticed teachers, club leaders, family members do seem to give her some kind of preferential treatment and I think it's becuase she is very compliant to adults and also very pretty she is.she is also genuinely good hearted and we've never had any reason to think she is unkind to others.
I want to guide her as best I can, as having an opposite experience of my looks growing up and generally being fairly invisible, I don't really know what you to help someone not place too much worth in their looks while acknowledging it's a lovely thing to be beautiful. Any advice on how to raise a particularly good looking child??

[likeamillpond]

OP

[likeamillpond]

My brother' s ex wife was extremely pretty (from South America) and also very very clever and ambitious.
However, behind the facade of her fake estate agent type smile she had a very nasty streak and loved to publicly humiliate people she saw as 'less' than her, such as waiting staff, shop workers and restaurant staff.
Pretty and smiley on the outside and ugly inside.
He's now with someone a lot plainer but who's a lovely person.
OK Dont let your daughter become like DBs ex.
Looks aren't the most important thing.

[Popcornbetty]

'Nah I doubt it when she is exceptionally beautiful.'

Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder sometimes as well. I remember this woman who used to rave on how beautiful her daughter was and she wasn't anything special at all!

[Emeraldshamrock]

Some of the best looking celebrities weren't the best looking children...
Hmmm hmm maybe it works the other eay around as well on some occasions!
Nah I doubt it when she is exceptionally beautiful.

Besides most celebrities are nipped and tucked the majority are plain behind the makeup clothes and professional styling there's no such thing as an ugly rich person unless they choose it

[Derrymum123]

The same way you would a less physically attractive child. Kindness and politeness and not to allow her to become that child that everyone can't stand because she treats others in a judgmental way based on their looks.

[KarensChoppyBob]

I don't think most celebrities really count in this, as they seem to purchase everything from their faces to their arses.

[Popcornbetty]

way*

[Popcornbetty]

Some of the best looking celebrities weren't the best looking children...
Hmmm maybe it works the other eay around as well on some occasions!

[Emeraldshamrock]

Some terrible comments, you are right pondering it.
She'll be fine 🙂 She'll win some and lose some but overall once she navigates the teenage years it will benefit her greatly.
It is unfortunate that some will hold it against her based on their insecurities.
My friends DD was a beautiful child she is a beautiful young lady now, she's humble and a really nice person but breathtakingly beautiful.

[sst1234]

OP, you should get Instagram. Have you considered maybe how to raise an independent, intelligent, curious minded daughter who won’t be worrying about her daughter’s looks if she has girls of her own.
Honestly threads like these prove that some women will never be more than about looks. Shame.

[CounsellorTroi]

@KarensChoppyBob

Lauren whatsername from TOWIE FaceTuned a pic of herself as a child for Instagram, that's actually truly sad.

It looks like she made her dad a couple of inches taller as well.

[jessstan2]

I was being lighthearted! I don't think the op was boasting either, not at all. Earlier on in the thread I said as much. This morning I saw the thread was still going and wanted to say something flippant, honestly.

No offence op.

(Forget my son, shouldn't have mentioned him. He's a scruffy looking git anyway )

[Ginuwine]

@jessstan2

I'm glad you have a good looking child, op. I'm sure that is not the only good thing about her.

I have an exceptionally charming and talented son by the way (but I tend not to talk about him so let's leave it there :-)).

Again, I don't understand what the point of this post is. OP wasn't on here to brag about her unknown child to a group of strangers. She was asking about the social dynamics associated with the perception of her child's looks.

You saying you won't talk about your great son isn't some sort of leading example to her to stop talking and boasting about our DCs. She wasn't boasting.

[jessstan2]

I'm glad you have a good looking child, op. I'm sure that is not the only good thing about her.

I have an exceptionally charming and talented son by the way (but I tend not to talk about him so let's leave it there :-)).

[ilovesouthlondon]

Typical mumsnutters...get a life those of you who live to degrade OP.

[Ginuwine]

@SugarbabyMilly

I said similar earlier but this thread has simply shown that people froth with jealousy at people who are better looking than they are.

No, that’s not it. Mumsnet has long become a place where people are routinely told ‘You Are Wrong’. Just because it’s a hobby. It never used to be like this. Now, whatever you post you get told ‘oh but we don’t know the other side of the story’.

This is spot on.

People queue up on here to invalidate an OP's experience with the aim of making that OP feel as shit as humanly possible.

[Anon778833]

I said similar earlier but this thread has simply shown that people froth with jealousy at people who are better looking than they are.

No, that’s not it. Mumsnet has long become a place where people are routinely told ‘You Are Wrong’. Just because it’s a hobby. It never used to be like this. Now, whatever you post you get told ‘oh but we don’t know the other side of the story’.

[Quirrelsotherface]

10:50Letsallscreamatthesistene

Did you read the paragraph about the boys's life being made a misery because of jealous people? And how he has low self esteem because of it? I'd say there's a fair dose of humility there.

I said similar earlier but this thread has simply shown that people froth with jealousy at people who are better looking than they are.

[TableFlowerss]

@Fembot123

There are some people that if they sadly went missing everyone would be looking for a totally different person based on their photos

So true

[Fembot123]

[Fembot123]

There are some people that if they sadly went missing everyone would be looking for a totally different person based on their photos

[TableFlowerss]

[quote Emeraldshamrock]@KarensChoppyBob it is sad.
I have to say I find it amusing when someone Facetunes edits their photo on SM you see the "you look amazing comments", it doesn't even look them in RL they're complementing an app might as well put up a picture of a Disney princess.[/quote]
😂😂 i know. Aww you’re stunning (as a cartoon version of youself 😳)

[TableFlowerss]

For example a mum phones up a model agency and says “you must see my stunning stunning child”

I can’t imagine the manager would be clambering over his take to get to the front door to see this magnificent beauty.

Had a colleague said ‘you need to see this DC I spotted at the station, they are stunning. I’ve and passed the details to mum - here is her number’

Now that works create more if a reaction as it’s an outsiders perspective so it’s not biased

[KarensChoppyBob]

Agree Emerald, and thanks to lockdown so many people haven't seen each other face-to-face for a while, some will be in for a shock.

If you live online and never meet people in RL maybe it works?

[TableFlowerss]

But logically though, not all children are equally beautiful’. And some parents will have children who will look more beautiful than others. There will be parents with genuinely beautiful kids.

Granted beauty is subjective, but there are socially defined features we as a whole find more attractive and some children will have these features whilst others don’t.

So it’s not always a case of a mother’s bias. Sometimes it’s just genetics

Of course and that’s why an outsiders perspective is needed, otherwise how do you distinguish between average and beautiful, given mums generally wear rose tinted spectacles.