To do what I like with my gift?

[Mixedupmuddle]

A relative bought me a birthday gift recently for the house. Haven’t mentioned which relative as it’s not really relevant (not MIL).
She apparently bought it with the intention of it being used in a particular room. (Think of something a bit like a sofa throw).

I have put it in a different room to where she ‘intended’ it to go, and she was not very happy when I sent her a picture to show her said item as that was not where she wanted it to go .

Aibu for putting it where I want it?

YABU: your relative is right, you should use it in the room she intended.

YANBU: it’s your gift, use it wherever you like!

[StillCoughingandLaughing]

A friend did this to me many years back when I got my first house. She bought me a mirror as a housewarming gift. I thanked her and said I thought it would look really nice in the hall. She made a face and said, ‘Hmm, that’s a bit downgraded isn’t it? I was thinking over the fireplace’. You’ve got your own bloody fireplace, love!

[TokyoSushi]

My DM is like this 🙄 Humour the person, take the picture, and then do whatever the hell you like with it!

[HeronLanyon]

YANBU.

[dogsonlead]

Hahahaha keep moving it to really inappropriate places and send her pictures every week. What a weirdo she is! A gift wjth conditions isn't a gift!

[clarepetal]

My in laws bought my son a plastic pirate ship foe a gift a few years ago. They said he could play with it in the bath, it was not a bath toy, and I didn't want it in the bath as it would go all mouldy and be a pain to clean.
I could tell they really wanted me to do this, but tough shit as it was me who had to deal with it. They weren't hugely bothered as they aren't unreasonable.
My mother has an annoying habit of trying to give me things when she is throwing them out thatbi don't need. Recently, it was a pair of slippers someone gifted her that were too small, I didn't need them as have loads of slippers, but she (and brother, as they were from his girlfriend) laid it on to me that it would be a waste if I didn't take them, I took them then threw them away in the end. It's not my shit to deal with.
Sorry, went off on a tangent them, just get annoyed when people try to do you a favour and get all bossy about it!

[SingToTheSky]

I agree not

[notanothertakeaway]

@Mixedupmuddle

Thank you! I think I’ll wait till tomorrow and say that I thought about it and she was right, it looks much better where she had intended it to go all along!

I don't think I would do that, as it sets a precedent of accepting tgat relative dictating to you

[PeggyHill]

YA probably NBU, but I reserve judgement until you say what it is and where you put it - a nice sofa throw being used in the dog bed is a pretty clear "fuck you", for example.

[CeeceeBloomingdale]

YANBU unless it was bought following a conversation along the lines of "I hate the hole in my sofa, I need something to hide it but can't afford it" and then they said "I know we don't usually do gifts but I got you a throw to hide that sofa hole as I knew it was bothering you so much". Then I would say it's been bought for a specific purpose and you should at least pretend to use it in that way.

[Woodspritely]

Are you using it as a dog towel? Or a floor rug under a high chair? If not, you should do what you like with the gift.

[Cattitudes]

Is this a big sister? You could come up with a good reason for having it where you do. 'I love it so much that I like to sleep with it instead of a duvet.'

[BusyLizzie61]

@Mixedupmuddle

It was around £30 so reasonably expensive considering we don’t usually do big gifts for the adults now there’s children in the family.

Did you put it elsewhere because it "fits" better there or because you don't like it as much as the relative hoped, so not worthy of the prime area?

[MrMucker]

Drape it over the car windscreen and send a photo tomorrow-
"Finally! No more scraping, thank you so much"

[WisnaeMe]

alternatively post it back to said relative.. thanks but no thanks ☺️

[Mixedupmuddle]

Thank you! I think I’ll wait till tomorrow and say that I thought about it and she was right, it looks much better where she had intended it to go all along!

[Elieza]

Like pp said, I’d also take a photo if it where she imagined it. Say how nice it looks there thanks v much. And put it straight back wherever you want it.

[Nandocushion]

Are you 'using' it in the closet under the stairs?

[Sparklesocks]

Of course not. People don’t give gifts on the condition they’re used in a specific room

[Shnuffles]

...but actually, I still wouldn't say anything to you about it, even if you put it in the bathroom. I might silently judge you, but of course you can put your gifts wherever you want them!

[Tinty]

Take a picture of it in the room which she wanted you to use it in, then immediately put it back where you want to use it

[Shnuffles]

As long as it's not a soft/fabric item (throw, cushion) that you've put in the bathroom, YANBU.

[Mixedupmuddle]

It was around £30 so reasonably expensive considering we don’t usually do big gifts for the adults now there’s children in the family.

[lboogy]

I find people who give with the expectation that they have a right to see the gift being used in any capacity really weird.

I give and let the recipient do what they like. I don't expect to see evidence of it in use.

[seensome]

YANBU it's your gift
It would be different say its something expensive and you're disrespecting it but something like a throw for the house, you use it where you like.

[WorraLiberty]

Is this a trick question?