AIBU to leave for one bad night

[Sherrybabyy]

Fiancé and I went to the pub for dinner last night. I was driving so he had a few beers before the meal at the bar. However he ended up absolutely pissed.

He tried to order another beer and they refused to serve him any more. At this point, he started shouting and swearing at the girl behind the bar, banging his fists on the bar asking ‘why won’t you fucking serve me?! It’s a fucking joke’. I have never seen him so angry. His whole body language changed, he looked aggressive- chest puffed out, shoulders back etc.

He ended up being told to leave by the manager who my fiancé accused of touching me inappropriately out of absolutely nowhere. He squared up to him, almost toe to toe, pointed a finger in this poor man’s face and shouted ‘did you fucking touch my wife?’. He then looked at me at yelled ‘did he fucking touch you?’ In front of the whole restaurant. I have never in my life been so mortified and disgusted by his behaviour.

On the way to the car, he was sick twice in the car park and sick all over himself and my car on the way home.

He doesn’t understand why I’m so angry at him. He left for work today feeling sorry for himself, trying to apologise. He said as he was stepping out the door ‘we could’ve stayed longer, I just needed to be sick’

All that from a 31 year old man.

[skybluee]

Also, if at any point you do have to go back to get anything: please take someone with you. Good luck! :)

[skybluee]

Sherry I've come back to read this thread after being away for a while, after having read the beginning of it when it was happening, and can I just say I'm so so happy to read that you left, you told your friends, your parents, and you blocked him.

Really, there's no point not having him blocked because he will get angry, send you horrible messages, or be falsely nice as pie to persuade you to get back with him and guilt trip you. You know, deep down.

So many people don't act in this situation and I wish I knew why as women we stay in these situations and I wish I had a magic wand to change it for everyone.

How he treated you is not OK, imagine having children with this man and them being around that. I know all of the studies say - and from reading this thread and other peoples experiences - that it gets worse after marriage/children.

I stayed in an abusive relationship and I regret it to this day, I still live with the injuries from it and it impacts my life. But this thread is not about me, but if I could change anything about all of that, I would have trusted myself and LEFT and BLOCKED at the first sign of anything (because I knew) and none of it would have happened.

You left... you have done the right thing. You have a new future - where you can meet a lovely partner, who will treat you with respect and act as someone should. Can you ever imagine acting towards someone else... how he acted towards you? No. It's not OK he did all of this.

I am so so happy you told your parents, you have somewhere to stay, you have your friends, honestly, reading this has really brought me joy so well done for doing something so amazing for your life and future. In time, I hope all of this will fade, you will move on and be living a happy life. Good luck :).

[81Byerley]

@DeathStare what an excellent post!

[YouretheChristmasCarcass]

Busy is good!

[billy1966]

Great update 💐

[Sherrybabyy]

Thank you everyone! I’m doing ok now, I’m keeping busy and not really looking back!

[Itsseweasy]

Just read the full thread and think you are amazing. Well done for seeing the relationship for what it was and having the courage to escape before serious harm comes to you. An exciting future (without him) awaits!

[YouretheChristmasCarcass]

Whew! That's a relief!!

Onwards and upwards!

[CustomerCervixDepartment]

Congratulations! On not forcing a kid to have that specimen as a father, and on ditching him and for choosing to not let his abuse continue! 🎉🎈don’t let him creep his way back into your freedom.

[Mrsmummy90]

Yay!!

[WizardOfAus]

Well done, OP. You rock.

[Sherrybabyy]

I have never been so grateful to have a period haha! Why do our bodies do this to us at the worst of times?!

[Newkitchen123]

That's your body being tense! Stress does terrible things to our bodies!
Now relax!

[billy1966]

Super news🙏👍

[DartmoorDoughnut]

Thank fuck for that!

[Cotswolds10]

Great news! I’ve been following this from the start. Onwards and upwards to an amazing new life.

[MerchantOfVenom]

Thank goodness.

[Sherrybabyy]

Phew! My period started this morning so I didn’t even need to buy a test

[YouretheChristmasCarcass]

Best of luck today with the test. Just remember you do have options. And none of them need involve him.

[isitpossibleto]

Good luck, OP. If you are please take at least a few days to think before you tell him (if you are and wish to go ahead)

[DartmoorDoughnut]

Hope you get the result you want today OP

[Mrsmummy90]

I'm glad you didn't tell him where you are! Stay strong today hun and hope you get the result you want xx

[billy1966]

*relationship

[billy1966]

I sincerely hope OP, that you are not pregnant and have any reason to have further contact.

He reads as an extremely rough, coarse, abusive man.

God knows the truly awful life you might have signed up for.

Your parents must be so relieved that they raised a young woman who could finally walk away from this utter shit show of a relatively.

He's chilling to read about.

It's ok to feel sad and wobbly, most would.

But do not be mistaken for a minute you have dodged an enormous amount of pain by leaving him.

Life is so short when you are happy and long when you are miserable.

Choosing a good, kind, loving partner can be the difference in how life pans out for you.

💐

[Weenurse]

Good luck 💐