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To think there should be a minimum age limit on ear piercing
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Forthepurposesofthetape · 11/04/2019 08:33

Was in a well known accessories shop yesterday and witnesses a mum getting her child's ears pierced. The child could have only have been about a year old and screamed the place down. She was so distressed. I really don't understand why it's necessary to do it at that age, it seems so unnecessarily cruel! Angry

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JacquesHammer · 14/04/2019 11:14

One of my teenage DDs wants a second piercing, but is scared of it hurting and says she wishes I did it when she was a baby and she wouldn't remember the pain

Whereas my 12 year old wants a second piercing and is happy to get it as she knows it won’t hurt (and how to look after it) because she consented to her first piercing when she was old enough to give informed consent.

Actually the pain from piercing - using your own comparison - compared to vaccinations is negligible. That still doesn’t make it acceptable to inflict body modification on an infant.

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Raspberry88 · 14/04/2019 11:13

As parents you make choices for your children...that's parenting. If your DD doesn't like the piercing, she can decide to stop wearing earrings and the hole closes up when she gets older.

Or you could just do nothing and wait until she could make the decision herself. No one needs their ears pierced.

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Raspberry88 · 14/04/2019 11:09

People from my country of origin are sometimes amazed, that you can have child after child in the UK and depend on the welfare system to house and feed them.... that your lack of financial resources are limiting your child from day 1. They make a judgement on your parenting for bringing a child into a life on the breadline which has a lifelong impact for your children, not a few seconds of crying.

Ah yes, the important western cultural tradition of having children on benefits. Don't be such a snob. People from every country in the would are perfectly capable of being financially irresponsible. What a stupid comparison. It may only be a few seconds of crying (and infection risk etc etc) but I also believe it sets a concerning message to children about their bodies. You don't own your children and have no right to perform cosmetic procedures on their bodies.

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SandyY2K · 14/04/2019 11:03

@TrixieFranklin
I very specifically said the pain...nothing else.

I'm well aware that vaccines are for medical reasons.
My point is that the pain is the same.

So it seems all those who disapprove of piercings know better (or think they do) than the multitude of experts, both medical, psychological and development wise for children. In this very enlightened and forward thinking nation in which we reside, you think such brutality would not be subject to the appropriate child protection laws?

If you deem it so terribly brutal, get a petition going and take it to Number 10. I'm sure it will be a welcome distraction from Brexit.

None of my DDs got infections from having their ears pierced as babies and I can't see any laws taking away my right as a parent to do this in my lifetime.

I used to get my hair braided/plaited as a little girl by my DM. It did hurt, combing my hair hurt, but it needed to be done.

As parents you make choices for your children...that's parenting. If your DD doesn't like the piercing, she can decide to stop wearing earrings and the hole closes up when she gets older.

One of my teenage DDs wants a second piercing, but is scared of it hurting and says she wishes I did it when she was a baby and she wouldn't remember the pain.

We can agree to disagree on this one.... as human beings we will always have different views.

A piercing is not taking a marchetti and butchering your child, as is being inferred by so many here. Talk about dramatic.

Anyway... I'm out of this...until another thread saying exactly the same thing comes up in.a few months or next year.

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cheercaptain · 14/04/2019 10:25

Exactly MagicKingdomDizzy. It's such a painful process and the pain goes on for days. My friend wasn't going to do it for her son but her parents insisted. She had to be dragged out of the room.

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MagicKingdomDizzy · 14/04/2019 10:14

cheercaptain

Baby boys cry when they are circumcised (...and during the healing process); has that been stopped?

It should be. Disgusting antiquated custom. I don't think it will be long before it is treated the same as FGM.

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MagicKingdomDizzy · 14/04/2019 10:12

almostsunny

My daughter had her ears pierced at 2.5 and she didn't even cry. (At Claire's)
They were amazing with her and asked her whether she wanted earrings, I explained it would hurt and she amazed me by not crying.


They asked a 2.5 year old if she wanted her ears pierced? And took her saying yes as proof she fully understood what was happening and wanted it done? Hmm

SandyY2K

Comparing vaccinations to ear piercing is ridiculous. One is necessary medically and one is not. I certainly wouldn't be poking my child with needles if it wasn't absolutely necessary.

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JacquesHammer · 14/04/2019 10:11

The pain of ear piercing isn't anything more painful than an injection for a baby

Could you compare the benefits of ear piercing with vaccination?

I would agree - the pain of piercing, if done properly with a needle is minimal. However the healing time, infection risk, damage risk and aesthetic risk makes it far more invasive, and in far more prominent a spot than ear piercing.

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cheercaptain · 14/04/2019 10:07

In many parts of the world, ear piercing is done at hospital right after birth and is very often without tears. The place I did my DDs have a minimum age of 2months so perhaps there is no law and its simply at the discretion of the store as a PP said in her store it was 7. Baby boys cry when they are circumcised (...and during the healing process); has that been stopped?

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TrixieFranklin · 14/04/2019 10:01

@SandyY2K when you start comparing ear piercing to vaccinations you've lost any semblance of a point.

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SandyY2K · 14/04/2019 09:56

When you start comparing this to being an alcoholic you've lost any semblance of a point.

Being an alcoholic is damaging to your health and has an age restriction. Having my ears pierced as a baby hasn't done any damage to anyone in my family.

I don't agree with pageants either but that's mental and emotional abuse on children forcing them to believe there self worth is only in their looks and ability to shimmy with some swim wear on.

Yet many pageant kids, now adults say they loved it and it gave them confidence.

The pain of ear piercing isn't anything more painful than an injection for a baby.

My DDs pretty much had the same reaction with both.

Ear piercing is not brutality, child abuse or assault as people are trying to say here. You can disagree with it and chose not to do it for your child, but you're never going to get any laws passed over it.

Other ethnicities are entitled to maintain their traditions when in the UK.... where those traditions are unlawful, for example forced marriage, shariah law or FGM, then you can expect to be dealt with by the full force of the law.

So for the many (and others have this same view globally) that argue the case, are you trying to say that child welfare/protection experts such as social workers, doctors, psychologists and child development workers have just ignored how life damaging and abusive ear piercing is at an early age? That their education and attainment has ignored something so very critical! Seriously... you just need to put it into perspective and make the choices you feel are right for your child, without being so judgemental.

People from my country of origin are sometimes amazed, that you can have child after child in the UK and depend on the welfare system to house and feed them.... that your lack of financial resources are limiting your child from day 1.
They make a judgement on your parenting for bringing a child into a life on the breadline which has a lifelong impact for your children, not a few seconds of crying.

So while you feel free to judge and I totally accept it's human nature to do so, accept that others could also take a dim view of your parenting choices too.

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Hoppinggreen · 14/04/2019 09:38

Eh?

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AliceAbsolum · 14/04/2019 09:37

No! This isn't China ffs.

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HexagonalBattenburg · 14/04/2019 08:52

I'm very laid back about my kids deciding what to do in terms of hair cuts etc - but ear piercing will wait until they decide to start asking about getting it done - I'm not going to force it onto them.

So far the 7 year old has no interest in it, and the 6 year olds interest was just looking at everything sparkly in the jewellery shop with Grandma the other day - and then buying a necklace.

Surprised my eldest hasn't started asking since her best friend has hers done to be honest. I'm happy to hold off as long as possible because there's a lot of issues with jewellery allergies in our family.

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JacquesHammer · 14/04/2019 08:42

You're still punching a needle through skin without consent (if it's a baby) for non medical reasons

That to me is all that’s needed to be said against piercing - I agree with you totally.

The thing about lobes is they’re unlike anywhere else on the body in terms of ease of piercing, pain level and healing time. I would imagine somewhere along the line their immediate visibility together with the quick healing time had some bearing on why they became so popular to pierce.

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MagicKingdomDizzy · 14/04/2019 08:38

JacquesHammer

I understand what you're saying. I suppose the point I'm trying to make is that physically a hole in the ear and a hole in the navel is still a hole in the body. One is just considered more appropriate and normal than the other. You're still punching a needle through skin without consent (if it's a baby) for non medical reasons.

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JacquesHammer · 14/04/2019 08:29

Just to clarify I’m completely against piercings a baby’s ears, but the act of ear piercing should be enough to discuss without other non-related piercings being used as a comparison.

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JacquesHammer · 14/04/2019 08:28

I would also ask anyone willing to pierce a baby's ears if they would consider piercing a child's navel or nipples acceptable?

For me this isn’t a good way to argue against piercing a baby’s ears because the sites simply aren’t comparable (and one is covered by an age restriction anyway).

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NearlyVegan · 14/04/2019 08:19

All the women in my family are alcoholics by my age does that make it ok if I just go and start sticking spirits in my morning brew? It's the done thing you know.

Ah it's the lack of thought process applied by most that destroys my faith in humanity.

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MagicKingdomDizzy · 14/04/2019 08:19

I would also ask anyone willing to pierce a baby's ears if they would consider piercing a child's navel or nipples acceptable?

And if not, why not? After all, a hole in the body is a hole in the body, regardless of where it is.

I judge people who do this harshly, and that includes my own sister who pierced my nieces ears when she was a baby. My sister now admits she regrets it, and had waited until my niece was old enough to make her own decision about whether to put holes in her body or not.

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MagicKingdomDizzy · 14/04/2019 08:11

TapasForTwo

What are the cultural reasons? Why can no-one answer this question? Being a "rite of passage" is IMO not a valid reason

There is no acceptable answer to this question, which is why it is never answered.

The best you'll get is someone saying every female in their family had it done at 3 weeks old.

As if that is an acceptable reason.

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Jaybee83 · 14/04/2019 08:10

I’m from Nothern Indian heritage. I’ve seen young girls in my circles who have had it done - I’ve asked why but never given a reason just think it’s what is acceptable.

Personally I won’t get my kids done until they’re at least 10 and then has to be their choice.

It is sad to see very small girls with ears pierced as it must have been very painful. I still remember mine I think I was 11 or 12. My great grandmother said in India they do it with a hot needle. I remember the gun hurting a lot.

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NearlyVegan · 14/04/2019 08:09

Sandy what you list other than the piercing is not inflicting pain unless you are force feeding shite like coke and sweets or a bloody whole scotch bonnet to your child from weaning.

I don't agree with pageants either but that's mental and emotional abuse on children forcing them to believe there self worth is only in their looks and ability to shimmy with some swim wear on.

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NearlyVegan · 14/04/2019 08:05

Circumcision is wrong if human males were meant to be born without a foreskin they would be. You know that thing called evolution, it would have taken care of it.

Then there is fgm it's a cultural thing but good god not acceptable. So is stoning someone to death for being gay all bloody cultural all bloody wrong.

Indoctrination is what you need to be looking up if you are so convinced it is ok to inflict pain on a child unable to understand or consent for aesthetic reasons.

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SandyY2K · 14/04/2019 08:04

We make all sorts of decisions for our kids for various reasons

Absolutely.

Including the type of food we give them and the clothes they were.

In America they put fake tan on little girls and OTT hairstyles in beauty pageants. I'm not fussed on it and do think it can look ridiculous at times, but that's their choice.

If the practice of ear piercing at a young age was considered harmful, it would not be allowed in the UK in 2019, in a time where health and safety and child protection laws are priorities.

In my culture little girls also have their hair braided from a young age, which some may not agree with. My DDs headteacher was one of them, until I informed her that this was part of our culture and if she wanted to challenge it I'd be taking it further. She didnt say another word on the matter after that.

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