To not want to pay £15 to go to a party?

[Clandy]

Friend is having a christening for her little girl in August, on the invite she has asked for £15 ASAP per couple to pay for the food. She has also said no drinks are included so bring your own. Aibu to be annoyed at this? My thoughts are if its a BBQ and she can't afford food, why not ask people to bring a few things but £15 is a lot esp if there is no drinks and its at her house so she isn't paying out for an expensive venue. Also if you can't afford a big party... Don't have one. We couldn't afford to so we didn't have a christening party. I am cross and don't really want to go

[ChocsAwayInMyGob]

Only the Paypal details will be in rhyming form.

[ChocsAwayInMyGob]

I've got a horrible feeling weddings will go this way in the not too distant future.

[WandaDoff]

What a materialistic arsehole.

She wouldn't be getting any money from me, & she'd be told what a grasping cunt she is as well

[Manchesterhistorygirl]

You are not being unreasonable!

It's beyond rude.

Dh and I were invited to a big birthday last year and asked to bring food, drink, chair to sit in each and a present!

This was shortly after a birthday party for the dc where we were also asked to bring food, drink and present, but no chair be sue we cold sit outside n the wall!

Same family obviously. Have you ever heard the like?

[maddening]

Take your own butties and a can of pop :)

[cafebistro]

Emsmaman - that happened to me too it was NYE of the millennium! Your party wasn't in Liverpool was it??

[Acandlelitshadow]

Cheeky mare

Go but take your own picnic

[whistleahappytune]

Bloody outrageous, and totally antithetical to the idea of a christening, which is about welcoming a new life to the community. This is a terrible start to give a baby!

I can see asking perhaps for people to bring a dish of something or even a bottle, but cash? Rude, rude and beyond rude.

[melika]

OMG what is the world coming to?

I have had at least 2 parties a year, all get fed and watered. Some bring drinks because it's something they like specifically.

But to charge, sorry I wouldn't go.

[ENormaSnob]

I have just thought of the perfect gift.

A customised tee shirt saying 'baptised in 2013, sponsored by clandy and co'

[expatinscotland]

Behind every grabby pisstaker, Clandy, stands a mug. You pay this gal £15, that mug is you.

[QuintessentialOHara]

Yanbu. If she is religious, she will Christen her dd without a party, as Christenings are not about parties, but a religious ceremony.

She is rude and lacking manners. Using her baby to get people to sponsor a party.

[raisah]

i meant nice food from m&s and waitrose not tescos and waitrose!

[raisah]

Really bad mannered, grabby d & cheeky. Is she going to use the money to get nice food from Tescos / Waitrose or Lidl/ Tesco value & pocket the cash? It looks like a scheme to make a bit of money & get people to pay for a party.

The host should provide food & drink, if she cant afford it then she shouldnt have the party. I suppise she wants you to buy her dd a gift? I cant stand this sense of entitlement that people have. They want everything and dont want to save money for it but expect others to pick up the bill.

She could have asked for people to bring a dish & thats perfectly acceptable. To ask for cash contributions to fund her own party is really ill mannered. I feel the same way about couples who ask guests to pay for their own meals at wedding receptions.

[ChocsAwayInMyGob]

OP-I like that idea! say "My gift cost £15 so you can just take that off my bill".

[MusicalEndorphins]

That is very strange of your friend, do you know her well enough to ask her why she feels the need to throw a party beyond her means?
Since you don't want to go now, don't. Tell her you will be at the church for the baptism but have plans for afterwards. (If she mentions you didn't have plans before say you forgot)

[Laquitar]

You can pop into my house tomorrow for a cup of tea. That will be £2.50 per head.

Playdate? Thats £10 per head. (pasta prices gone up)

Come to watch my holiday photos. Thats £7 per head.

What else next?

[expatinscotland]

Oh, Clandy, get real! She's a complete pisstaker! Don't pay £15 to line her pockets.

Go to the church service, leave a present and check out.

Anyone who does this isn't a mate.

[olivertheoctopus]

Wow, that's rude. I'd be tempted to offer to take something tangible like a salad or a cake rather than cold hard cash.

[Clandy]

I might ask her in advance for a contribution towards my gift....

[AnnaRack]

Bet they have a baby gift list too. Shocking

[Shenanagins]

Better check there is no corkage charge as well!

[GreenEggsAndNichts]

OP will end up paying and going. :) Especially if, as she says, the woman and her DD are good friends of hers.

But yes, it's very rude. I'm not above asking for people to bring a dish, but even then that's usual for a casual BBQ. Celebrating something like a christening would be an occasion to host the whole thing yourself, and just tell adults if they want real drink they'll need to bring it. etc.

[thermalsinapril]

YANBU. Parties are about providing hospitality to your guests. You provide for your guests when it's your party, and others provide for you when you attend theirs. You certainly don't go to other people's parties and consume the free food/drink and then expect them to pay to attend yours! Agree with Horrace that it might be best just to go to the service and then leave. If she doesn't have the funds for a party, why isn't she just doing tea and cake at the back of the church?

[SauvignonBlanche]

WTF?
Are they joking?