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AIBU?

WWUD - christening presents if not close to family

16 replies

Schnullerbacke · 04/04/2011 18:43

I have never been to a christening before and not sure of the protocol. We are not very close to this family, more like neighbours helping each other out. They have 5 kids so money is obviously of concern. So, if you are not the godmother, merely invitees, what is the present protocol?

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HipHopopotomus · 04/04/2011 21:13

I didn't expect presents when dd was christened though she did get a gift from her god mum and s couple of relatives. I'd just give a card.

Ceic · 04/04/2011 21:07

I was going to offler loads of suggestions but then you said it was to get into school. A card and an offer of help with the party should do.

KaraStarbuckThrace · 04/04/2011 21:05

I was really pleased and surprised to get so many gifts, got some clothes, small toys, some books.
Don't buy a bible and traditionally that is what the Godparents will give. You could buy some stand alone bible stories for small children, though. DS got a lovely Noah's Ark picture book.

thinkingkindly · 04/04/2011 21:02

Thinking about it, a couple of my mums-and-babies friends came to DD's christenings and they gave cards only, as did my mum's best friend. Everyone else gave a gift I think. My kids were babies, though. I think it is different if they are doing an en-masse baptism for practical reasons.

grovel · 04/04/2011 20:58

The "proper" form is that only godparents give presents. And grandparents - if they want to.

bubblecoral · 04/04/2011 20:52

If you go to the Christening, you should take a present.

Same with a vow renewal imo, but you would hope that a couple renewing their vows would ask for no gifts or charity donations or something. You don't go to a birthday party without at least taking a bottle of something nice, why should any other event be any different?

I'd try for a family present in this situation though.

Schnullerbacke · 04/04/2011 20:50

Thanks for all your lovely ideas! Mumsnet to the rescue yet again.

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OpheliaBumps · 04/04/2011 20:41

If you are neighbours who help each other out, how about asking if they need any help with the food/drink/cake etc for the christening?

When the DTs were christened I said to people 'no gifts required' but still received a lot of absolutely lovely and useful stuff, which I felt oddly guilty about.

amidaiwish · 04/04/2011 20:38

are they all getting baptised together?
if so you could get them something like this as a family present
children's bible

Schnullerbacke · 04/04/2011 20:33

Well, all the kids are older (between 7 and 1 yr) and since they are only doing it (well, primarily) to get into catholic school later, I don't feel like I want to spend tons of money on presents. It would be a very different story if they were really good friends of mine but....

Also, do you give anything if someone renews their vows?

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thinkingkindly · 04/04/2011 20:16

The nicest non-traditional gift we got was a pretty china money box. DD (4) uses it now, and loves it. A china mug is always nice too, or a tooth-fairy pot. We also got lots of books - some religious, others nicely illustrated fairy stories, poetry anthologies etc. Agree that a small gift is fine.

sparkle12mar08 · 04/04/2011 20:15

A christening is about welcoming a child into the church and really shouldn't be seen as a gift giving/getting occasion. But if you feel you really need to take something then make it very small, preferably under a fiver if possible. I give cards only at christenings.

ENormaSnob · 04/04/2011 20:10

A bible?

amidaiwish · 04/04/2011 20:08

I would bring a small present. For DDs christening we got some nice hardback books, some with a link to her name, others more religious books. Also a couple of nice plants, a rose bush (linked to her name) which i thought was a lovely present.

lilyliz · 04/04/2011 20:06

nice photo frame and then it can have a pic of the babies christening in it.

BlueFergie · 04/04/2011 18:49

I remember when DD was christened being really surprised at the number of presents we got. I had never been to a christening before that, but if I had been invited to one I am not sure the thought of a present would have occured to me. Anyway now I always buy small presents for the child - a toy or a little outfit. For both of ours we also got loads of picture frames which I liked. If you are close enought to have been invited I would get soemthing but just something small for the baby. Under a tenner should do it.

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