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Can we talk about the f word

134 replies

HighlandWorrier · 16/10/2018 18:52

As in fart?! After 16 years together I am no longer mortified when I have to pass wind around him but DH always passes a snide comment, like he never does it Hmm As a good Scottish saying goes "where ever you may be let your wind blow free!"
I know it's not supposed to be ladylike and I would be mortified in public but come on fellow mumsnetters admit it do you let rip in front of your other halves too or disappear off somewhere private?

OP posts:
toffee1000 · 16/10/2018 18:58

Mumsnetters NEVER EVER fart. Certainly not in front of their DHs! If they have to pass wind they go to the bathroom.

There’ve been farting threads on MN before and the attitude I’ve seen from some posters is ridiculous IMO. Many MNers seem v v precious about it.

HighlandWorrier · 16/10/2018 19:02

Oh dear maybe shouldn't have posted but the fizzy wine made me do it Wink

OP posts:
KindergartenKop · 16/10/2018 21:26

I love to fart and I'm not holding it in for anyone. My DS cried on the weekend because he wanted to come in my bed and cuddle but it smelt too badly of farts SadGrin.

BetterEatCheese · 16/10/2018 21:31

We both fart in front of each other, always have, no issue at all

Ohyesiam · 16/10/2018 21:33

If you can’t fart I front of your life partner, it can’t be a very comfy life.

Singlenotsingle · 16/10/2018 21:35

DP goes to the bathroom and let's rip! I don't fart at all, but the dog does. She could clear a room in 2 seconds, and she DOESN'T CARE!

ShirleyPhallus · 16/10/2018 21:37

I know it’s an essential bodily function etc

But I honestly find it absolutely disgusting. I really cringe when people find it funny.

I will always try and keep the romance a bit between me and DP and that includes not farting in front of one another if we can help it!

AnneLovesGilbert · 16/10/2018 21:39

I’ve only ever heard DH fart when he’s asleep. Honestly, till that happened I didn’t think he even did it. I was quite relieved.

It’s a normal function but I don’t get why it’s funny. Having a wee isn’t funny. Sneezing isn’t funny.

myidentitymycrisis · 16/10/2018 21:41

Unfortunately our bed truly stinks. especially after dp has been on a garlic binge.
I still don't like doing it in front of him sometimes they make their way out unannounced.

MattBerrysHair · 16/10/2018 21:45

Dp and I both have IBS and fart a lot. At the very beginning of the relationship I tried to be polite and keep it in until I was out of his presence but i was forever having to leave the room and it took up too much time. Now we don't care, life is too short. He revealed that during the 'polite' phase of the relationship I would fart enormously in my sleep, which I don't do so much of now. So all you people who claim not to do it in front of your dp's are probably just letting rip all night long.....

Socksandshoes · 16/10/2018 21:47

Since having dd via c section I have very little choice in the matter. They are both loud and frequent.
Luckily dh couldn’t care less.

huggybear · 16/10/2018 21:48

So no one has farting matches with their DP? Me neither.

Socksandshoes · 16/10/2018 21:49

No. We never do that. And I NEVER win. Blush

QueenOfMyWorld · 16/10/2018 21:54

If I have to I will and so does he,it's not ideal or pleasant but ill be fucked if I'm traipsing to the bathroom every time

SheWhoDaresGins2 · 17/10/2018 09:02

sometimes they make their way out unannounced

GrinGrinGrin

Mine too Blush

SheWhoDaresGins2 · 17/10/2018 09:03

Socksandshoes me too!! No control and can be violent explosions, like physically hurt as they pass Confused

tectonicplates · 17/10/2018 09:08

Finally, people are taking sense on this thread!

I absolutely cannot believe some of the precious people on MN, waiting until their DH goes out before they have a secret fart. It's ridiculous. It's not a public place, it's your home that you share with an intimate partner. WTF is wrong with people?

welshweasel · 17/10/2018 09:10

We all fart freely in our house. Holding in wind isn’t good for you. And we laugh about it. So kill me Grin

Chelsea26 · 17/10/2018 09:11

I’ve not been with my BF that long so still in the ‘polite - hold it in phase’ however this morning he told me that in bed last night I cuddled him all night “like a little trumping koala” Blush

DontCallMeCharlotte · 17/10/2018 09:20

*A little trumping koala" - that's adorable!

And we never play fart tennis. Oh no.

Jaxtellerswife · 17/10/2018 09:24

I honestly don't, just personal preference.
But after I had my daughter we were in hospital because I'd had surgery after a fourth degree tear. We were wandering around (very slowly) and out of nowhere escaped the sounds of hell from my arse BlushI had no feeling at the time so didn't know it was coming and my ever sympathetic partner laughed until he cried. Two years later I still hear about it lol

buscaution · 17/10/2018 09:28

I have never understood the big deal with farting. I mean it's just a fart. Mumsnet be so precious about farting. Imagine not being comfortable enough, in your own house, to simply fart Shock

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waterlego6064 · 17/10/2018 09:30

I did a really unusual and magnificent fart in bed the other morning.

There was a brief silence and then, from OH: ‘Wow!’

I’ve never had a ‘wow’ for a fart before. Feel very proud.

SheWhoDaresGins2 · 17/10/2018 09:53

Once woke myself up with a stupendous fart that sounded like a ships horn. I wound up laughing hysterically and could't get back to sleep.

susurration · 17/10/2018 10:19

If I had to go to the bathroom every time I needed to pass wind, I'd never be able to leave the house.

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