If you eat at a buffet, you take your life in your hands. Here's why

'What are the worst crimes you've seen committed at an all-inclusive buffet?', asked one Mumsnetter, citing her own personal gripes: the picking up and putting back of items; the cross-contamination of food stuffs.  But the list didn't stop there; in fact, this smörgåsbord of grossness is enough to put you off buffet-dining ever again. You have been warned.

1) Double dippers

double dip

"Double dipping in the hummus after you've put one end of the breadstick in your mouth. Eek!"

"Labradors can't eat a whole bread stick in one mouthful - they need the second half moistening with dip too. I learnt that from my friend on New Year's Eve. She wasn't even pissed."

2) "Conveyer belt toaster arseholes"


"How could I forget the conveyor belt toaster arsehole - hovering in front of it in case someone nicks their precious heated bread?"

"No, it's my toast. I watched it going in, it didn't cook and I put it in again. That's why it's nice, golden toast. You put 18 slices in and wandered off. The pile of slightly warm bread stuck to the crumb tray is yours."

"I always turn up the conveyor belt toasters. If I wanted warm bread I'd layer a slice over my coffee to gently steam it."


3) Sniffers

Alan Partridge photo cheese_zps3de54e1f.gif


"I saw a guy at an all-you-can-eat place last week pick up some sushi with his hands, sniff it and put it back."


4) Samplers 


"I saw a woman in Morissons walk around the salad bar with one of the plastic forks, eating a bit from each of the salads." 


5) Teeny Juice Glasses of Dashed Hopes

small glass

"My gripe is about those who get their minuscule glass and fill it with juice, then stand and drink it at the dispenser, refilling it two or three times.  You have to ask for a large glass, for water... and then fill it with juice."


6) Outlandish flavour combinations

hotdog and banana

"I saw one guest with his breakfast plate piled up with bacon and eggs etc. So far, so good. He was also carrying a side plate with two Danish pastries sandwiching a couple of fried eggs."

"I went on a 5-star cruise to Alaska and was horrified by the buffet antics, especially one lady who came away with beef stew and lemon cheesecake on the same plate."


7) Finger lickers 

lick finger

"Picking something from the buffet, licking fingers, going in for something else, licking fingers and so on, until they've inserted their dirty digits in every dish along the length of the buffet." 


8) Meat mountains

chicken balls

"My most favourite moment ever was at an all you can eat Chinese. A woman took every single chicken ball and piled them on her plate until it resembled the Ferrero Rocher mountain."

9) Straight-up, unabashed, shameless freeloading

 photo BUFFETpizza_zps3b4b90bd.gif


"We watched as a guy asked for three take-home boxes, then preceded to go up and fill all three  with pizza. Even when the pizza had run out he continued to stand there and wait for more to be brought out so he could continue filling. He rammed them full and walked off."



Last updated: about 3 years ago