Mumsnet and the master baker

A confused stranger came onto Mumsnet with a perplexing dilemma.

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She'd arrived home earlier than expected, and interrupted her husband indulging in some 'quality alone time' in the living room. "Which is fine" - she's a liberal type.

"But Paul Hollywood was on the TV, talking about bread. It wasn't even live TV - he was watching it on demand." Gosh.

"Anyone else think this is odd?" she continued. "I haven't said anything to him yet."

Mumsnetters were intrigued by this story of sex, tugs and sausage rolls - they're a rye bunch, and were soon on a roll. 

"I hope you gave him a pizza your mind."

"Bet he comes out with a load of half-baked excuses."

"He wasn't expecting you to foccacia him at it."

Kneading bread

"I'd baguetting out of there if I were you."

"If you stick with this pervert, you'll be a gluten for punishment."

And naturally, "LTB (leaven the bastard)."

Other MNers took a different view, and advised her to rise above it...

Bread rising

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"A man's got kneads <shrug>"

"He wasn't to know you were only a scone's throw away."

"But did he crumb?"

Paul Hollywood

Image credit: BBC

"At yeast he wasn't cheating on you."

"Did he look glazed when he had finished?"

And, perhaps inevitably…

"I hope he didn't end up with a soggy bottom."

Paul Hollywood

Image credit:



Last updated: about 3 years ago