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Tooth fairy writes harsh letter to eight-year-old

Tough tooth fairy

You won't have any difficulty getting your children to brush their teeth if you take a leaf (or a letter) out of the tooth fairy's book, as one father recently discovered

Are you struggling to persuade your kids to look after their teeth? If so, you could learn from Henry Warren who's found a novel way to get his son Sam to brush properly – with help from the tooth fairy.

When eight-year-old Sam, who is reportedly “awful at brushing his teeth,” lost a tooth recently, Henry did what most parents do and told his son to put the tooth beneath his pillow. The next morning, when Sam woke up, the tooth fairy had collected. But the tooth fairy had also left a sternly-worded letter, warning Sam about the dangers of neglecting his teeth.

The letter is a masterpiece of persuasive bureaucracy. Parents, take note:

“Dear Mr. Warren,

This letter is to inform you that I have now taken receipt of your tooth and it is being duly processed in our system.

You will have noticed there has been a delay in your payment for the tooth. Mr. Warren, I have to inform you that this is due to the condition in which we found said tooth. We expect a certain amount of wear and tear on the teeth we appraise. However in this case your tooth had to be referred up to the committee for further analysis.

We believe this is due to the lack of care and attention by yourself. We have detected more than trace amounts of Fanta™ and residual amounts of both cereal and chocolate which have not been removed by appropriate brushing technique. We recommend you review your practice here as a matter of urgency.

Mr. Warren we will accept the tooth on this occasion but we need your assurances that the condition of your next tooth will be significantly better or we will withhold payment.

Sincerely yours,
Barry T. Tooth Fairy.”

letter

Sam showed the letter to his father and, since then, it’s been shared widely on social media – and praised by other parents who are keen to find ways to get their children to take care of their teeth.

Barry T, a tooth fairy operating in the London area where Sam lives, has become something of a hero. We expect he might be working overtime as more parents discover the benefits of a few tough words from such an influential character.