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Four years ago, my life changed forever

Dilan and Me Dilan and Me reflects on how her boy has helped her through everything from betrayal to separation, and finally finding herself


""This week is always a challenge, this month is always a difficult one.

The memories still haunt me. They are constant reminders of the choices I made.

Sometimes all of the regret and the guilt is just too much to bear, and I agonise over the things I would change if I could. Sometimes the sense of failure rises up from beneath me and takes over completely. Sometimes I would give anything to go back and start it all again. To do it right, to do it better.


But this week I look down beside me and I know I can be strong. Somehow through it all we carried on, and we will continue to survive. I don't know where we are headed, I have no idea where we will be a year from now, but I know that we will have each other. This little boy has shown me more love and more happiness than I even knew existed."


Monday's blog of the day: The four phases of realising you'll have to give birth again

Random Musings By Nobody Important has been through childbirth twice already - is knowing what's coming the hardest part?


"Phase 1: HORROR

Approximately 30 seconds after the cross shows up on the pregnancy test stick, you realise in absolute, stop-still-and-freeze horror that you'll have to give birth again. Previously rosy memories of birth, polished by years of telling, become distinctly less rosy in the light of this new realisation.

Yes, they were comparatively easy and straightforward, but, you know, it's all relative. They still felt like every bone in your body was being broken at regular intervals. You remember that ever since, you have assessed all pain on two separate scales: normal pain and birth pain. No pain you've experienced since, including broken bones, has ever made it above a 3 in the birth pain category."


Friday's blog of the day: Dreaming of strike action

Mad House Mum wishes she could announce she's walking out, just for a day


"The storm cloud of husband and teenagers leaves the house just ahead of you. You shut the door behind you on a mess that will greet you with arms flung wide open on your return at 6pm.

Your train is cancelled due to the strike and as you clutch at your one bastion of freedom that is a Costa coffee, you dream of going on strike.

You stand there on the platform and you imagine that one day your service will not be running: there were crisis talks, but no resolution was reached and the dispute continued. The two sides could not agree. One side felt aggrieved that she did all the work running the home, for no extra pay and the other side disagreed and felt that her allegation was unfair."


Thursday's blog of the day: "We are done with school"

A very excited The Airing Cupboard will soon take the plunge and start homeschooling her daughter


"We've made our decision. We're 99.9% certain. We're going to homeschool. Actually it'll be unschooling, but more on that later. It's such a relief.

I knew in my heart that it was going to be this outcome but I think I needed to go through the process of agonising over it first. So that's it. We're going to let Amelie finish out her preschool year in the Montessori, though I'll continue to be lax about whether she attends or not.

We've missed quite a lot of days for sickness, homeschool meet-ups, and for the days when she just wanted to stay dressed up as a princess. Once she's finished the year we'll slip into summer mode and basically stay in summer mode for the rest of her childhood."

Wednesday's blog of the day: My "perfect" children are just as annoying as yours

After receiving an anonymous message criticising her for complaining about her children, Five Little Doves felt the urge to hit back


"The message said: 'I was surprised by your post on Instagram this evening. You would think that someone like you would be more grateful for your children.'

Let me tell you that 'someone like me' may well be the proudest mother in the world. Even as the years pass, I still feel incredibly grateful that we have been blessed with four healthy children in our arms. Never for one moment do I take that for granted, nor forget just how unbearably painful our journey was to have them.

And yet the truth is this. 'Someone like me' still has days when I struggle to like my children very much at all. As much as I love them, and I can't even begin to tell you just how much, the days when they whinge from morning 'til night, when they trash my home, hit, kick and scream at each other, when they embarrass me in public, terrorise me in the supermarket, refuse to eat a dinner I have spent hours slaving over, I'll be honest, I find it hard to come up with even one redeeming quality."

Tuesday's blog of the day: Thought your relationship had seen it all? Have a baby

This Valentine's Day, Teeny Tiny Toddlers revisits the highs and lows of her marriage, from getting a puppy to hours of painful labour 


"Having a first baby is always going to be a unique experience and a little test (er, huge assessment) of how well you REALLY work together with your partner. Much of the early days went by in a blur for me and we talked a lot about what an easy baby our daughter was, so I'm thinking we didn't do too badly, all things considered. It was probably that smug attitude which ended us up with another baby exactly 15 months later, and we quickly found that two under two was a whole different ball game...

But we certainly can't imagine life without them now. As odd as it might sound, sharing something so great can be hard too. We both want the best for them, but our definitions of "the best" are not always aligned. And there is always some level of guilt."


Last updated: 21-Feb-2017 at 1:38 PM