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Terrible at everything

(13 Posts)
Dontknownow86 Fri 07-Aug-20 17:24:05

Has anybody else been consistently terrible at almost every job and managed to eventually pull it together? I try so hard but I'm a slow worker, easily distracted, struggle to cope with boredom and it always ends up catching up with me. It doesn't matter what I try I always end up in this rut. I've been through a few different jobs and it keeps happening.

If you've managed to turn this around how have you done it? Sheer effort alone isn't working as I end up feeling so stressed and fatigued I fall into depression.

OP’s posts: |
Ceriane Fri 07-Aug-20 20:45:02

You know, I was starting to think I was the only person with this problem. I start jobs, and for the first few months they sing my praises and then, no matter how well intentioned I am or how hard I try, I at some point have a brain fog day or week and everything goes pear shaped. Generally happens when I’ve been used to doing the job one way and then they bring in a lot of change all at once when my brains not in gear. It’s happened at several jobs for me. I’m good at some things, but really really have to concentrate to pay attention to detail, I really do struggle that way, it’s weird, and really affects my confidence. Unfortunately I’m dealing with a really unreasonable bully boss at the minute, so my stress levels are high. I’m in my 30s and STILl trying to find my niche. I will do, but I don’t think the job I’m doing at the minute is really for me, just doing it cos I need a job. Hugs.

Dontknownow86 Fri 07-Aug-20 20:53:03

That's exactly how every job with me goes. I'm know I'm not stupid and I try so hard to stay engaged but it just turns into total fog, and I feel like I'm thinking through treacle especially once it starts getting old. I'm in my 30s too and wish I could just find something that clicks or at least where it wouldn't become obvious.

OP’s posts: |
Ceriane Fri 07-Aug-20 21:10:45

That’s exactly what I’m like. It’s never at the beginning of a new job, it always happens once I’ve reached that foggy lull place if they then make changes. For example, in lockdown, I got used to doing things the old way and that was fine, then new manager came along and made massive changes and suddenly I had to wake my brain up again when I just wasn’t in the right frame of mind ....made a few dozy mistakes and then the problems began. I’ve always seen admin as a “for now” job....but I still don’t really know what I really do want to do. I know it not my niche.

LonginesPrime Fri 07-Aug-20 21:22:33

Have either of you thought about ADHD as an explanation for your difficulties?

Dontknownow86 Fri 07-Aug-20 21:33:55

I have thought about it and I mentioned it to my doctor once but he made me feel like I was being stupid.

OP’s posts: |
LonginesPrime Fri 07-Aug-20 21:46:31

Well, if it is ADHD, it's likely to be hard for you to articulate your thoughts under pressure. And if you've felt crap at work for years, it's not surprising that your confidence is low and you weren't able to advocate for yourself with your GP (and/or he might just be an arsehole).

I would have a google and look at the diagnostic criteria or do an online test. Then if you still think it's that, I'd go back to the GP with a list of how your issues are adversely affecting your life and why you think an ADHD assessment is needed.

They're unlikely to do something if they think you're just curious to know whether you have it, but if you explain that it's ruining your career, you can't concentrate on anything and it's knocking your confidence massively, they will hopefully realise you're not just idly musing about it and actually need some help.

The other option is to go private for an assessment if you're not getting anywhere on the NHS and have the means.

MostIneptThatEverStepped Fri 07-Aug-20 21:54:25

This is how I feel and I am currently waiting for my ADHD assessment appointment after reading a thread on here that prompted me to go to my GP.
I find starting jobs very hard, all that fiddly new info to get my head round, get into a good zone and then go off the boil, making loads of mistakes and just shying away from the big picture stuff (it's overwhelming).
Not quite sure what I'm going to do with the info if I get a diagnosis but it will certainly explain a few things about my life!

LonginesPrime Fri 07-Aug-20 22:07:30

Not quite sure what I'm going to do with the info if I get a diagnosis but it will certainly explain a few things about my life

I found the diagnosis hugely helpful in lots of ways, and career-wise especially in shedding some light on why I've been more successful in some jobs than others, which is very helpful in terms of knowing what sorts of jobs to avoid in the future!

BadDucks Fri 07-Aug-20 22:12:52

My first thought was ADHD when I read your post. It’s worth investigating and if it is the case then you can look into strategies that will help you function better at work.

Ceriane Fri 07-Aug-20 22:16:58

Hmmm... Just googled it and think I may have it!

zerocraic Fri 07-Aug-20 22:20:27

This is me too sad I know I'm quite intelligent but i find it so hard to be productive. I have seen the ADHD suggestion here before, I'm not discounting it at all but is it ever just to do with a bullshit work environment, modern attention spans and a bad personality/temperament fit for a job?

LonginesPrime Fri 07-Aug-20 22:52:35

is it ever just to do with a bullshit work environment, modern attention spans and a bad personality/temperament fit for a job?

If it's just one job/environment it could well be. With ADHD, it will have been present from childhood and will affect several different areas of one's life (if not all of them). So if someone's issues affect them only at work and nowhere else, it may well be the workplace/job role that's the problem!

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