So many mistakes!,

(5 Posts)
kiddingmyfatself Fri 21-Feb-20 13:05:43

Not sure what I'm expecting from this post tbh, maybe just to offload a little in a safe place?
I have worked in the same fiel professionally for almost 40 years no problems at all in all that time. Now suddenly I have made a mistake which means I have had to write a report for the coroners court and possibly appear there. It's nothing I did specifically but a lack of documentation really that has led to this. I feel so awful and can't sleep for going over and over what I should have done. The interview I had re this was really aggressive and unpleasant.
Now issues have been raised re a staff member that I should be supervising but I haven't kept on top of the supervisions at all for various reasons - none of which are excusable- what has gone wrong ?
I haven't actually worked many days this year due to planned leave and sickness, I work part time as well so keeping up with everything is a bit of a challenge but I've always managed so far.
I really feel it's all getting on top of me and I'm not really sure where to get support it's quite an aggressive blame culture place and I'm a not very assertive person, usually I just get on with things. Dreading going in on Monday .

OP’s posts: |
daisychain01 Fri 21-Feb-20 16:23:45

Now suddenly I have made a mistake which means I have had to write a report for the coroners court and possibly appear there

Your post doesn't give much away in terms of what you're looking for by posting on here but clearly the incident and your role in it is what stands out in your post.

Are you suspended due to whatever happened?

Probably not being much help but its difficult to comment on such a sensitive subject without have to make assumptions. Let's us know how we can help with any practical advice.

Are you getting g any moral support from work or have they basically cut you adrift?

LisaSimpsonsbff Fri 21-Feb-20 16:27:59

I think you need to be really honest with yourself about whether these two things were awful one-offs or not. Is documentation often missing, but it's just that this time someone died and so it became an issue? Do you often not manage to supervise someone as you're meant to, but on this occasion there's been an issue with this person and so it's been highlighted? I think you can't really do anything unless you know whether these were two isolated mistakes or whether they're ongoing issues with bigger causes.

kiddingmyfatself Fri 21-Feb-20 17:03:30

thank you for your replies yes I keep wondering if I have just been lucky for a long time and have actually been incompetent without being discovered or recognising my incompetence?
I obviously cannot go into detail but the coroner case is a person who died lots of people had involvement with him both the acute sector and community including the GP. I only saw him once 10 weeks before he died so I don't think I can be held responsible but I was shocked at how many important things I hadn't recorded.
I am completely up to date on all the staff I supervise except for this one person - who hasn't actually done anything wrong but is a bit hard to tie down to see. She's based in another location but no excuses I should still have pinned her down.
I always felt I'd been promoted above my abilities and I think things are starting to unravel

OP’s posts: |
LisaSimpsonsbff Fri 21-Feb-20 21:20:29

I keep wondering if I have just been lucky for a long time and have actually been incompetent without being discovered or recognising my incompetence?
I always felt I'd been promoted above my abilities and I think things are starting to unravel

This made me feel really sad for you, and it's really unlikely to be true. That sounds like imposter syndrome talking. It doesn't sound like you have been making mistake after mistake but even if it is more of a pattern then I think it's most likely to be one of these three, not fundamental incompetence:
a) you're too overworked. Absolutely everyone's performance drops off if they're working beyond capacity.
b) you're burnt out - I take it that you work in a frontline, caring role (social worker), in which case burn out is sadly common
C) you've got a bit complacent - you've obviously been doing this a long time, and it happens. It doesn't make you incompetent or terrible, but it can be a bit of a wake-up call. However, I wouldn't leap to this one when it could be a) or b).

None of those three are an unsolvable problem or proof that you should never have been promoted.

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