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Privacy violation and feeling depressed

(6 Posts)
Ashley333 Fri 14-Feb-20 12:34:39

Hi this is my first post and I'm feeling low. At work we have inboxes where you can grant people access to cover your work. We have to do it. I also use Skype to message colleagues and my boyfriend who works at same place. Admittedly I have got involved in some bitchy comments and I know this is stupid. The skype messages shouldn't be seen by coworkers. Anyway it was brought to my attention that people could view my Skype messages if they wanted and now I am panicking and feel people have had the nerve to look at them when they have no business there. A few people seem to be being funny with me (could be paranoid) and so in my head they have seen the messages. The worst would be between me and my boyfriend just general moaning about my colleagues. 1) I feel violated and dont know what people have seen 2) I feel a terrible person for saying things (never said anything awful) because of this I feel I have wrecked my life I will lose my job my boyfriend will then leave me. I have been having flashing thoughts of just stepping in front of a car. I cannot think of anything else except what have people seen. It's a very bitchy place to work but I have been doing so well in the company and now I have wrecked it all if people have had the audacity to look through things they know they have no place looking. I know this is a minor problem compared to others but I feel so affected by it sad

CircleofWillis Fri 14-Feb-20 12:41:43

What sort of comments are you worried about?
First of all calm down and realise it really isn't the end of the world.

Then ensure your Skype is now secure.

Next It might be a good idea to go to the people you are most worried about and come clean about the comments and apologize to clear the air. I'm sure most of your colleagues have had a moan about each other to loved ones although they have probably not committed it to writing and accidentally shared it.

Lastly, are you sure you want to work in such a bitchy environment long term? Perhaps start making plans to move to an environment that would be better for your mental health.

Ashley333 Fri 14-Feb-20 14:45:12

Thank you for your reply, I found it helped me- especially the calm down part which I have now done. I dont even know half the stuff I've said as I've now deleted everything and made sure this cant happen again but stuff like 'I'm sick of doing so and sos job they're useless' ... or saying I was loads better at something than a particular person. Sounds silly now I say it but 1 particular person I get on with and would hate for them to see one comment that doesn't summarise the way I feel about them at all. As you say i know everyone else does it but I'm the fool who has written it down. Lesson learned thats for sure. I am looking for another job in the same company as it's too good a place to leave in terms of pay/benefit. Thank you for helping me, I had nowhere to turn and was getting myself very worked up for a minute reason!

CircleofWillis Sat 15-Feb-20 00:01:41

Ashley, I'm glad you are feeling better about it all. It sounds as if you have already put the wheels in motion to better the situation.
flowers

mumsie2019 Mon 17-Feb-20 03:28:17

Don't get to upset about it,, we all bitch and moan about people it's human nature
If anyone has seen the messages,one day it will blow over.
It is horrible to work in a unhappy workplace and have a look for another job?
In the future write your messages as if the person was actually reading it or going to be read out back to you.
As you said your doing well, a few messages having a bitch.. at least your human and have a personality!

JourneyToThePlacentaOfTheEarth Mon 17-Feb-20 04:34:19

OP I've been where you are and I understand how worried you're feeling but in all honesty, no one will be arsed enough or daft enough to set about reading your personal Skype messages. Would you read someone else's? Please calm down, be brave, and remember if you believe people are thinking bad of you everything about their behaviour will confirm that in your mind. So keep believing all is well and it will be

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