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Not sure if I'm being precious or not...

(4 Posts)
MyGhastIsFlabbered Sat 02-Nov-19 17:13:46

I work in a very small team-at the beginning of the year there were 4 of us, all part time. When I had my appraisal review in May I mentioned to my manager that I'd quite like to take on 'meatier' things....not a problem she said, there are always projects that need doing. I started one project almost immediately and it's working really well so far.

Over July/August all 3 other team members left/retired so for a few weeks I was doing it on my own. We've since hired 2 people, let's call them A&B, and I've been training them up. A already had experience in a similar role but B needed training almost from scratch. A & B are both on the same money as me as I saw the job advertisement when it was published. This may or may not be relevant.

I get on really well with A and B, we've built up a really good team very quickly. BUT this is where I wonder if I'm being precious. We're taking on new processes to our team but every time one comes our way the first I hear of it is when it's announced that A will be taking ownership of it. And the processes she's so far taken on haven't been filtered down to me. If I ask her when she's going to go through the process with me and B she's a bit cagey and we never get anywhere.

So, am I being a bit precious, and if I'm not how do I bring this up? I don't want to cause bad feeling but neither do I want to be pushed out.

Sorry it's so long and rambling.

maxelly Mon 04-Nov-19 13:10:28

I wouldn't say you are being precious but I think you need to sort out in your own mind what is bothering you here, is it that you feel you deserve a salary increase or a promotion, or is it that you still feel a bit bored/un-stretched and want some meatier projects, or is it the lack of communication from A/your manager about the new processes? Any or all of these are perfectly fair things to raise in themselves but are separate issues really and if you muddle them into one big conversation you might risk seeming a bit whingy and/or not getting the outcome you want.

It does sound a bit as though A has been brought in on the basis of her prior experience and is therefore being given first call on leading the new processes. That might be reasonable on the part of your manager if A is the best person to do it, but I'd be a bit miffed too especially as you've made it clear you are up for taking on more. If this is your biggest issue I would simply approach it in a constructive way with your manager in a 1-1 setting, don't accuse A of anything or say you feel excluded/shut out, but remind your manager that you are really keen to develop and take on more, and you'd really appreciate the chance to lead on a new process (perhaps suggest a particular one if you can) or to work alongside A on one if s/he feels more comfortable that way. Ask if that is possible and if not why not, s/he might say it's better for one person to lead/coordinate everything and they've already given that job to A which would be fair enough but disappointing, in that case I would see if there are other areas/projects aside from the new processes you could take more of a lead on to make you more commensurate with A?

Over the years I've been in situations where colleagues are effectively (although not explicitly/formally!) promoted over me and given all the exciting new responsibilities while I am stuck 'competently'/boringly doing all the normal work and/or the less 'sexy' projects, and it does suck, TBH I've always eventually ended up leaving the role in those circumstances. It doesn't have to escalate into a big drama and I can feel quite philosophic about it in hindsight (particularly once I've moved on into a new/better job! wink ), sometimes there just aren't enough opportunities to go around or my colleague was a better fit at the time, or maybe they were simply pushier, more confident or ultimately friendlier with the manager/powers that be than me, which is a bit rubbish but not worth losing sleep over. I do understand it hurts and can be quite confidence/morale sapping at the time though so you have my sympathies!

Good luck, hope you can sort it out.

NoProblem123 Sat 09-Nov-19 23:24:49

What Max said !

Alsioma Sun 10-Nov-19 01:57:47

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

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