Lack of confidence holding me back

(11 Posts)
LackOfConfidence Fri 12-Apr-19 21:53:28

I’m self employed. I’ve been pootling along part time for a few years. Making ends meet. Ive come up with various directions I’d like to go in over the years but dread of failure always means I talk myself out of trying anything. I see all these new businesses coming up on social media from people I knew from school or former colleagues etc and think “well if they can do that, I can do what I want to do” but I’m too afraid to go for it and spend money incase I’m a massive failure and everyone will laugh at me. I know how ridiculous that sounds.

I need to reprogram my thoughts to get rid of this deeply ingrained self doubt.

What do I do? I need to pull myself out of this work rut.

OP’s posts: |
pottyteethfacehands Sat 13-Apr-19 20:07:07

Ohmygosh.... I could have written this post word for word.

Hugs, it's not easy.

I think its the vulnerability of 'putting yourself out there', being seen to launch and then people watching your results to see what happens.

I think it's time for us both to put the blinkers on and get on with it!!

AventaRizon Sun 14-Apr-19 18:08:33

Yes, but what you don't see on facebook is all the businesses that people tried and which failed to take off. Nobody boasts on FB about those!

UbbesPonytail Mon 15-Apr-19 12:16:57

I’ve had this in the guise of imposter syndrome. But I’m not an imposter. I’m bloody great at what I do and it’s okay for me to say that out loud!

Take it one idea at a time. You wouldn’t be making ends meet if you couldn’t do it.

I’m not completely sold on the theory but have just listened to an interesting podcast about lack v abundance mindsets. The essence is believe in yourself and remember that opportunity is not a finite commodity, look outward and do for others what you want to do for yourself.

LackOfConfidence Mon 15-Apr-19 12:29:53

Thank you everyone for responding. Lots of great points being made here. I need to take a deep breath and make the leap. And decide that it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks about it. Negative self talk is a horrible habit. Need to find a way to stamp on that when it starts.

OP’s posts: |
UbbesPonytail Mon 15-Apr-19 12:38:23

One thing I do when I have an idea is actually write it out. All the to dos, the to buys, the how to market etc and build a mini business plan. It makes it feel more obtainable and far less scary than just having an idea wafting around in my head.

LackOfConfidence Mon 15-Apr-19 12:43:54

I have a book full of ideas, plans, budgets, steps etc blush it’s just actually taking the first step where I get the jitters and talk myself out of it. It’s like the cold light of day hits and all I can see is problems and reasons not to do it.

OP’s posts: |
UbbesPonytail Mon 15-Apr-19 13:34:19

I know, it’s hard. I’m launching a new side to my business and I’m having to really force myself to mention it to potential clients. Have you thought about a coach/mentor? Someone to hold you accountable or make you feel like you have permission?

CloudRusting Mon 15-Apr-19 13:36:10

Feel the fear and do it anyway

LackOfConfidence Mon 15-Apr-19 15:04:56

That’s a good idea ubbe. I have a close friend who is really the only person I have vaguely discussed any off this with and she is very supportive/encouraging. Maybe I should lay it all out as my “official plan” and ask her to help keep my focus if she hears me talking myself out of anything.

OP’s posts: |
Clavender Thu 18-Apr-19 13:36:34

Sounds like you have a great cheerleader, just believe her! I think once you have taken the plunge you'll wish you just got on with it. Good luck!

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