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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

When saying 'mother' is 'harmful' and 'intimidating'

11 replies
OP posts:
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Outbutnotoutout · 18/05/2021 14:24

This is interesting

When saying 'mother' is 'harmful' and 'intimidating'
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ArabellaScott · 18/05/2021 14:25

97% gosh.

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YetAnotherSpartacus · 18/05/2021 14:30

Heartening! (The 97% that is).

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DaisiesandButtercups · 18/05/2021 14:32

Yes it is interesting. There’s nothing like alienating the majority for the comfort of the 1%.

There’s a word for that isn’t there? Elitism? Oligarchy? Or maybe theocracy in this instance is more appropriate. It doesn’t seem all that inclusive anyway.

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Babdoc · 18/05/2021 14:35

What did the daft idiots expect?
“Mother” is one of the most emotionally loaded and visceral words in the language - it carries massive baggage and meaning for the whole human race. Mess with it at your peril!

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DaisiesandButtercups · 18/05/2021 14:53

When an organisation is about mother to mother support for mothering through breastfeeding it is hardly surprising that messing with the “mother” bit of that would be upsetting for current members. It is fundamentally changing the focus of that organisation.

As the article says becoming a mother is a significant life change, many of us need support during that time of “matrescence” from those who have been there before. The loss of the word mother further devalues mothers and mothering and makes us invisible.

Parent to parent support for parenting through human milk transfer (includes chest and breastfeeding) has quite a different feel to it...

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DaisiesandButtercups · 18/05/2021 15:05

Clearly the sensible approach is to use traditional mother centred language in general communications and publications whilst using the preferred language of individuals in one to one situations and in some cases having specific leaflets or web pages to suit those with different needs.

The opinions of current members of organisations and those who regularly attend meetings should be taken into consideration. Has there been a proper survey? What do mothers choosing this style of mothering want? The one above had a clear answer as did the ones that we’ve had on AIBU on this site. These kind of organisations are based on celebrating and supporting mothers specifically and creating an exclusive single sex space where not only is everyone in the room female but everyone in the room is currently or has at some point breastfed a baby. When the switch is made to a parenting organisation that space is lost.

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Findwen · 18/05/2021 15:20

Sorry for the derail, one of my friends recently had a baby. I've been looking for a doll to buy the little one - but they are all so transphobic ! Everyone of the speaking dolls says something like "Mama !" -- urgh..

Does anyone know where I can get a more inclusive dolly that says: "Parent with a cervix" ?

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Babdoc · 18/05/2021 15:43

Findwen love it! Grin

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Delphinium20 · 18/05/2021 22:14

Those poor women. What gross misogyny to be harassed for referring to yourself as a mother.

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RufustheBadgeringReindeer · 18/05/2021 22:18

@Findwen

Sorry for the derail, one of my friends recently had a baby. I've been looking for a doll to buy the little one - but they are all so transphobic ! Everyone of the speaking dolls says something like "Mama !" -- urgh..

Does anyone know where I can get a more inclusive dolly that says: "Parent with a cervix" ?

Shame del boy isn’t selling hooky goods out of his suitcase

I bet he’d have one
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