Marion Fitzgerald says women shouldn't get “hysterical” about the risk of being murdered by a man

(70 Posts)
UhtredRagnarson Thu 11-Mar-21 11:12:11

link

Because men are far more likely to be murdered than women. This is in response to the murder of a woman, by a man.

hmm

Don’t you ya just love to be called hysterical when in fear for your life?

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TartrazineCustard Thu 11-Mar-21 11:15:35

I've been seeing this view point a lot online recently. Men kill men a lot, and men also kill women, so women shouldn't worry about being killed by men because they should worry more about men.

As ever, we exist to care for others more than ourselves.

Hailtomyteeth Thu 11-Mar-21 11:17:25

It's not 'hysterical', it's reasonable to be angry and afraid.

AbsintheFriends Thu 11-Mar-21 11:18:24

I heard this while I was doing something else. At first I thought I'd misunderstood and she couldn't be talking about the murder of women, by men, in their homes and in the streets, by male strangers and male partners and male acquaintances in such an utterly matter of fact tone.

But she was.

It happens, ladies. Nothing to see here. Don't panic, it probably won't happen to you, but just accept that it might without making a silly fuss about it. Men don't make a fuss, after all, and they're more likely to kill each other.

WendyTestaburger Thu 11-Mar-21 11:19:43

I read that. Yes we all know men get murdered more. But ffs how to miss the point. Also no mention of sexual violence and constant harassment and intimidation. Most men do not walk the streets in fear.

At least the BBC quoted Julie Bindel too. They did also use the phrase "male violence", which I think has recently been declared "transphobic" and a "dog whistle" so it will be interesting to see if that stands.

newrubylane Thu 11-Mar-21 11:20:59

Do men get targeted, followed, sexually attacked, picked off at random while minding their own business by a man looking for a victim?

UhtredRagnarson Thu 11-Mar-21 11:26:40

I just can’t believe someone would be so tone deaf as to say this in response to the murder of a woman. What is wrong with her?

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PurpleWh1teGreen Thu 11-Mar-21 11:32:21

I heard the interview and felt she was very dismissive of women. Jess Phillips was far better.

userlotsanumbers Thu 11-Mar-21 11:32:35

On point with the terminology used too. The root of the word hysterical comes from the Greek, 'hystera' meaning womb, uterus.
Because only women get uncontrollable emotions - men of course, just 'snap'. Totally different. And kill - but let's not blow it out of proportion, eh?

Etinox Thu 11-Mar-21 11:34:18

Eugh
Who is MF?

JayAlfredPrufrock Thu 11-Mar-21 11:35:59

R4? I was outraged. More men than women are murdered. Only 11% of murders of women are by a stranger. No need for hysteria.

The one fact she didn’t bother with is that 99% of murders are committed by

Men.

(I made up the 99% but I’m sure it’s fairly accurate)

toffeebutterpopcorn Thu 11-Mar-21 11:36:56

This really upset me this morning.

How many of the killers are men? Men are - I would suspect - more likely to be killed in violent confrontations/fights/crime related activity...

How many are raped and threatened with murder? How many murdered by ex/partners or during 'rough' sex? How many have been through an event when they genuinely felt that they would die?

Maybe statistically women are less likely to be murdered by a stranger (and remember women take precautions when out at night/in strange places) but her whole 'don't be silly girls' tone was deeply offensive.

LunaHeather Thu 11-Mar-21 11:40:50

Oh dear
I have no idea who this is or how it was said

But I regularly say to my panicky mother that I'm a lower risk of getting murdered. Stranger murder is a low proportion of murders isn't it?

Yes, it's always fecking men but was this lady making a point about "stranger danger"?

UhtredRagnarson Thu 11-Mar-21 11:42:59

userlotsanumbers

On point with the terminology used too. The root of the word hysterical comes from the Greek, 'hystera' meaning womb, uterus.
Because only women get uncontrollable emotions - men of course, just 'snap'. Totally different. And kill - but let's not blow it out of proportion, eh?

Totally. It was the “hysterical” that caught my attention.

Men are never hysterical are they? hmm

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stuckinatrap Thu 11-Mar-21 11:43:49

No one has ever denied that men are murdered more than women.

But what is the breakdown of the 'why'? I guess a lot of murdered men are killed in fights, stabbing a due to gang violence...etc.

The only fair comparison would be 'how many men are murdered just for being men?' Vs 'how many women are murdered just for being women?'

OldRailer Thu 11-Mar-21 11:45:02

Surely one factor in why more blokes get murdered in public places is because they don't take the same precautions as women?

Weirdfan Thu 11-Mar-21 11:45:50

My 12yo DD just asked me why I was ranting muttering to myself whilst reading this thread and when I explained, referencing the case and mentioning the warning police had put out for women to stay home, she said 'but why should women stay home when it's men causing the problem'. Feeling proud and dismayed at the same time was a very odd experience, if a 12yo gets it why doesn't Marion?

dellarossa Thu 11-Mar-21 11:48:07

JayAlfredPrufrock

R4? I was outraged. More men than women are murdered. Only 11% of murders of women are by a stranger. No need for hysteria.

The one fact she didn’t bother with is that 99% of murders are committed by

Men.

(I made up the 99% but I’m sure it’s fairly accurate)

I was just about to say exactly this!

Leaving aside the other very valid points that it largely is only women who have to think about being attacked and how to mitigate it with any regularity, the fact is that most violence is perpetrated by men... that is the issue, not the sex of the victim!

A 2016 study of all murder in Sweden over a 30 year period found that men committed 9/10. I’m not sure if any other studies have been done.

UhtredRagnarson Thu 11-Mar-21 11:49:28

The thing is if men decided to gather and reclaim the streets from the violent men no one would call them hysterical. No one would tell them they’re more likely to die from an accident would they? No one would basically say “shut the fuck up and sit the fuck down”

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AgentCooper Thu 11-Mar-21 11:53:35

Fucking hell.

God, I used to chuckle at my mum for worrying about me on nights out, or if I was travelling alone. I remember her saying she didn’t want me going down to Manchester for the weekend at the time the serial killer in Ipswich was at large. I thought that was funny (I was 19) because they’re nowhere near each other. Now I’m 35 and I see that no matter where this happens it’s just another fucking reminder of what men can do to us.

UhtredRagnarson Thu 11-Mar-21 11:57:34

Same @AgentCooper. As a child I used to hate always being made to go with my younger sister to the toilet when out. I kept waiting for her to be old enough to go by herself. I now realise there is no age where girls and women are safe.

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TheChampagneGalop Thu 11-Mar-21 12:03:05

It's not just tone deaf, it's pure misogyny to use "hysterical" about women being afraid of male violence.

InThisMultiverse Thu 11-Mar-21 12:03:23

I wonder how many men are worried about being plucked off the streets and killed by a woman.

giletrouge Thu 11-Mar-21 12:11:43

Women are murdered by men.
Men are murdered by men.
Men are the problem.

Retinal Thu 11-Mar-21 12:26:03

Tone deaf indeed. But maybe she’s had to (or is naturally inclined to) have such an air of self-protective detachment when dealing with crime and its horrific details that she simply sees statistics stripped of their humanity - number crunching epidemiology if you like. I didn’t hear the interview so can’t comment as to whether she was saying it in a ‘calm down dear’ way or whether she was simply churning out facts in a very dry, unemotional, unempathic way with absolutely no notion of how it might be received by a female audience who WILL be looking over their shoulder even more as they go about their business. Who booked her for the interview and what was their agenda in putting forth this perspective the morning after we’ve just learned of the murder of a young woman?

We all know what the optics of any march/protest will be - how it will be hijacked by all sorts of groups and it will result in lots of media coverage. All fine and good but what will happen? What should we be looking at - laws and policies? Policing? Prevailing attitudes of misogyny? Denigration of women in society. Treatment of those men who commit the crimes. Prisons? The protections given to women in law? Sex-based Rights? All the shit that is going on behind the scenes that is leading me to fear for the quality of life and opportunity that my daughter will experience as she embarks upon her teen years.

Recently I’ve had an awkward and uncomfortable conversation with my daughter about not letting her walk in our local woods alone. Her brother is allowed (although I fear for him too because I am aware as a young Male he is liable to be a victim of knife crime, mugging etc) But we all know we have to have this conversation with our young women and it pains me. Because it’s not fair. She knows it, I know it and maybe I should just let her Free and ‘statistically’ she’ll be fine. But the fact I’ve had to have the conversation means she’ll be joining me in that state of constant vigilance. I walked through the woods alone myself the other day and it was fine. But on another day I had to leave because there was a man in there who stared a bit too long at me when he passed me and then kept stopping and looking around as if checking to see if there was anyone else around and it spooked me. So I hung back until another elderly dog walker appeared with their wife and hated that I had to devise these strategies to feel safe and that I have to do it all the time.

The use of ‘hysteria’ was shit. These past few days though - women have every fucking right to be wary and piss-boilingly angry.

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