Advanced search

17 year old kills mother details

(35 Posts)
Tootsweets23 Mon 14-Dec-20 18:18:19

There is an awfully grim story about a 17 year old boy who strangled and murdered his mother in the Times.

It is all awful, however the details on his gender issues and mental health are worth noting. He was born Ben, had mental health issues including being suicidal and depression, declared himself genderless plus there is a suggestion of autism.

The father says he was in a mental health unit which segregated boys and girls which made his gender identity issues worse. He doesn't say if he expected his son to be in a mixed unit or in with girls - either would have put the girls' needs second to his needs.

He was due to stand trial in October but killed himself four days before.

So grim, the poor woman.

OP’s posts: |
NotTerfNorCis Mon 14-Dec-20 18:31:00

It looks like many people struggling with mental health issues express it through gender experimentation.

I know such a case personally. Luckily mild issues. He 'detransitioned' after having identified as a woman for 2 years, taken hormones and pushed for surgery.

Circusoflove Mon 14-Dec-20 18:34:17

Will this go down as a trans related child suicide of the type that Mermaids say happen in significant numbers?

Mrsmorton Mon 14-Dec-20 18:37:00

I came on to see if this had been posted. Clearly a deeply unwell child.

willien Mon 14-Dec-20 18:41:05

Stabbed her 188 times, Jesus. That is so chilling

willien Mon 14-Dec-20 18:41:18

118 sorry

NiceGerbil Mon 14-Dec-20 18:44:37

Oh goda horrendous story

I can't read the whole article. Were authorities aware of the level of threat he presented? Has something been missed that would have prevented this?

happydappy2 Mon 14-Dec-20 19:00:44

Another terrible example that children suffering with gender confusion often have other issues as well. When will we start being honest with children and give them mental health support, rather than experimental hormone treatments? He was clearly extremely unwell.

HollowTalk Mon 14-Dec-20 19:04:48

I always wonder whether the woman in a situation like that was on MN. She said to a friend she was walking on eggshells all the time - it sounds as though she'd be asking for advice on a forum when her child has so many problems.

Flaxmeadow Mon 14-Dec-20 19:10:01

I can't read the whole article..

It's in the Mail as well, full article

Private school pupil, 17, killed his mother by stabbing her 118 times

SonjaMorgan Mon 14-Dec-20 19:10:10

How much research has been done on the relationship between autism and gender confusion?

I am concerned that many mental health issues will be missed in those wanting to transition or having issues with their gender due to health professionals not wanting to be labelled as transphobic.

FWRLurker Mon 14-Dec-20 19:36:08

My husband identified as trans and transitioned for 2 years before desisting because of mental health issues. Fortunately he wouldn’t hurt a fly, his issues are all self directed.

I don’t think the “anyone who doesn’t validate you is committing violence and therefore deserves violence” rhetoric is helpful Though.

HighHeelBoots Mon 14-Dec-20 19:53:11

Years ago I worked in an acute mental health unit. Cross dressing was common amongst our service users, well the male ones. Sometimes it was just cross dressing, others had an alter ego some had the delusion they were someone else. We also had adult babies and those who fetishished wearing/soiling nappies
Its never mentioned now in relation to MH issues. All had had trauma in the past and the treatment was talking therapies alongside medication, depending on the diagnosis of course. Some hated women particularly their mothers
We now, in general society, have to pretend this doesn't exist for fear of upsetting the ideology, or that's how it seems to me

irishfeminist Mon 14-Dec-20 20:16:29

Look how the Guardian reports it. Dishonest as ever. "They"hmm

NiceGerbil Mon 14-Dec-20 20:20:31

The father feel feels the child was failed by authorities.

If things have been missed that could have prevented this I hope they come out.

NiceGerbil Mon 14-Dec-20 20:21:14

I really think there's a lot going on here and I'm not sure why the papers are all highlighting the non binary identity.

irishfeminist Mon 14-Dec-20 20:24:04

Yes, absolutely. It's a horribly sad account of someone who was severely mentally ill. The violence followed a male pattern though, and obfuscating the murderer's sex like the Guardian did, was wrong. No other news outlet did.

Emeeno1 Mon 14-Dec-20 20:24:35

'I always wonder whether the woman in a situation like that was on MN. She said to a friend she was walking on eggshells all the time - it sounds as though she'd be asking for advice on a forum when her child has so many problems.'

Interesting considering there is a mum on here tonight asking if she should send her daughter back to university (safe, secure) because her daughter has been telling her to fuck off, calling her a cunt, and buying alcohol for her 13 year old brother and letting him drink it in her bedroom and a lot of posters are telling the mum she is being unreasonable. And that it is basically her fault.

How the fuck did we get here? If that poor mother came here looking for help she would probably have gone away feeling worse.

Grellbunt Mon 14-Dec-20 21:02:32

Those quotes sound very odd, childlike. As if he had a learning difficulty. Doesn't add up.

OneEpisode Mon 14-Dec-20 21:03:11

So sad that I will never meet Joanna. The news reports are around the inquest into her death.
It seems the reporting on Rowan’s death might be more pertinent. This family was clearly let down by mental health services.

StillAHarpie Mon 14-Dec-20 21:53:43

Horrific, i find it disturbing how many mothers are killed by their sons

elgreco Mon 14-Dec-20 22:18:41

I was talking about this to my husband. I asked him why do disturbed sons nearly always kill their mothers rather than fathers? He replied that the fathers had probably fucked off already. Its just not fair.

EmbarrassingAdmissions Mon 14-Dec-20 22:39:39

It's a tragedy on so many levels. I hope that something useful emerges from the enquiry into Rowan's death and highlights useful service improvements for young people and their parents/families.

ClarenceBoddicker Tue 15-Dec-20 03:05:36

Pretty horrific case. Read this in the Daily Mail originally. Then the Guardian. Whilst both were mindful to the legal implications i despaired at the Guardian version which seemed to deliberately just miss out certain factors which I consider to be relevant rather than just incidental

ClarenceBoddicker Tue 15-Dec-20 03:06:29

Guardian says son kills mum. That’s it

Join the discussion

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet

Already have a Mumsnet account? Log in