@IrishCawfee
And how has it changed your life?
Thank you.
Oh gosh... Where to start.... I wouldn't be able to fit it all in a single post, so I'll try to summarise as much as I can.
I was raised as a Jehovah's Witness from a young age by my mum. I'm also from an Indian background and I lived in an Islamic country. So I've had exposure to all kinds of faiths and religions - Roman Catholic, Protestant, more evangelical types like Jehovah's Witnesses, Pentecostal etc, along with Hinduism and Islam.
The concept of atheism is quite unknown among South Asians. The assumption is even if you aren't overtly religious, you and everyone else will/must always believe in God or some sort of higher power. For most people, if you say you're an atheist or try to explain the concept, their reactions can range from confusion to looking at you like you're from another planet.
And also (unfortunately in my view) women from these regions are
way more religious than the men and less likely to feel bold enough to entertain ideas like atheism or abandoning religious beliefs. Maybe it's changing with the younger generations as they connect with other people around the world and absorb more westernised media.
Anyway, I say this to give context as to how difficult it is to question your own religion and other religions and to reach a position of rejecting all of them. It is really not easy because religion and culture is very closely intertwined and the concept of separating religion and state seems like a distant dream.
Family, community... Everything is connected to religious beliefs and rituals and of course women are at the bottom of the hierarchy in them all. The vast majority accept this meekly.
My questioning and rejecting of religion was based a lot on how it affects and impacts women and how, irrespective of the religion, Indian women are always second (if not third) class citizens. And that we have to accept our place with men being the "head".
I dunno, I've always found it hard to swallow that concept. I'm too headstrong and stubborn and I like to think things through logically. I love science and understanding the world around me. I tend not to get scared or existential about "unknowns". I find a lot of beauty and comfort in knowing about the physical and material wonders of the universe and all that is in it. I don't feel threatened by the fact that there is much out there that we haven't figured out yet. I feel humbled by knowing how insignificant I am in the grand scheme of things.
For all sorts of reasons, I eventually couldn't justify my belief in religion and God. I love reading about ancient religions and seeing parallels with more modern ones. Human civilization, history and culture passes through generations and these stories / ideas evolve and transmit via religions.
Our exceptional intelligence as a species also brings all kinds of mental health issues, and I see humans as finding solace in religious beliefs as a way of coping with the existential dread that is the consequence of our intelligence and self-awareness.
I used to be really depressed and suicidal when I believed in God because I never felt I could live up to all the crazy standards required from me. Plus I could never really suspend my rational thinking and have blind faith. I sometimes wish I did as life does seem easier if you can have blind faith.
Overall though, I am so much happier as an atheist. It's like a huge weight has been lifted off me. I have been very fortunate to have a good life and live in a good country that protects my right to live free from religion. There is so much beauty and wonder in the natural world. I've never felt the need for a "higher power" to experience admiration and humility at our brief time in this world. I know that humans, as amazing as we are, do not sit outside of the animal world. We are not above it, even though we have always tried very hard to pretend that we are via creationist myths. I think those myths are ways to grapple with some very complex ideas.
I can understand people's need for religious beliefs when their lives are very hard and their circumstances particularly cruel and difficult. I can see how powerless so many women are in their societies and so I understand that they hold onto religion to help them get through such unfairness. When you know you are born and will die as a second class citizen with men always dominating you, then I can imagine you need the comfort of a better afterlife to get you through your lot in life. Although at times the afterlife perks for women still don't seem as good as what's promised for men, but something better than nothing.