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The NHS is run by misogynists, say women forced to give birth alone

(191 Posts)
MillyMollyFarmer Sun 20-Sep-20 13:54:00

Tory MP Alicia Kearns has been running a campaign to make all NHS trusts change the policies around women giving birth and for pregnancy check ups during Covid. It’s horrific but I didn’t realise it was still ongoing now. This includes women who have lost their babies and have to proceed with the process alone as partners wait outside. I’m so utterly horrified at the inhumane way they are dealing with this. It’s unnecessary. Apparently Boris has backed calls but some trusts are just ignoring women’s requests. I find this so upsetting.

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jellybeanbonbon Mon 21-Sep-20 19:28:26

Re the female workforce in hospitals/maternity care, a lot of the passionate posts about lowering restrictions/allowing partners in more I’ve seen on social media are from midwives

bythehairsonmychinichinchin Mon 21-Sep-20 17:16:39

Posted a few minutes ago, in case anyone reading is interested getting involved...

LittleTiger007 Mon 21-Sep-20 14:12:34

Interesting... if harrowing reads. Thanks for those links @bythehairsonmychinichinchin

MillyMollyFarmer Mon 21-Sep-20 13:46:06

Thanks so much for those links

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bythehairsonmychinichinchin Mon 21-Sep-20 13:41:05

The ultimate impact is birth trauma and midwives, MSWs also experience this too.

bythehairsonmychinichinchin Mon 21-Sep-20 13:35:04

@LittleTiger007 yes millymollyfarmer is correct. I meant the knock on effect by not allowing birth partners to attend births and stay on the postnatal wards.

LittleTiger007 Mon 21-Sep-20 13:34:49

Ok. Sorry. That makes much more sense!

MillyMollyFarmer Mon 21-Sep-20 13:32:07

LittleTiger I think bythehair means that not having a birthing partner means an increase in workload for HCPs

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LittleTiger007 Mon 21-Sep-20 13:30:46

Please explain how a midwife becomes overstretched because my husband is by my side?

I mean I know they are over stretched. That’s a given. But because an extra body is there holding my hand or rubbing my back??

bythehairsonmychinichinchin Mon 21-Sep-20 13:16:28

An HCP isn’t the priority, the patient and their welfare is. The guidelines allow a birthing partner. The campaign is about ensuring all trusts follow guidelines

The knock on effect is that midwives and MSWs are over stretched (especially as there’s staff shortages) which impacts both the mother and baby’s welfare.

ArticulateYourLife Mon 21-Sep-20 13:14:54

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

ArticulateYourLife Mon 21-Sep-20 13:12:45

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

LittleTiger007 Mon 21-Sep-20 13:11:40

@MillyMollyFarmer here here! Sing it from the rooftops.

MillyMollyFarmer Mon 21-Sep-20 13:05:16

An HCP isn’t the priority, the patient and their welfare is. The guidelines allow a birthing partner. The campaign is about ensuring all trusts follow guidelines.

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MillyMollyFarmer Mon 21-Sep-20 13:03:34

Nor do you get to police a thread. I can come on and talk about kittens if I want, you don't get to decide that.

I suggest you read talk guidelines, as you actually can’t.

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LittleTiger007 Mon 21-Sep-20 13:01:16

Yes minimise footfall. I see the reasoning behind that. So that should mean BOTH parents present. Leave it at that. No grandparents, aunts, uncles, best friends etc unless there is no partner.
Many studies have shown for best outcome the woman needs a partner/support person present.

ArticulateYourLife Mon 21-Sep-20 12:57:01

* I’m afraid you don’t decide what a thread I started is about. This is about a specific maternity campaign.

*Nor do you get to police a thread. I can come on and talk about kittens if I want, you don't get to decide that. Or is feminism about shutting down anyone who doesn't agree with you.

It people are at the pub drinking, I think we can get partners or doulas in the birthing room and that is currently allowable under the restrictions. What is happening is some Trusts are not following the guidelines that allow this.

A poor comparison. A hcp chooses whether to go to a pub or not. They still have to go into work. It's about minimising footfall in hospitals.

LittleTiger007 Mon 21-Sep-20 12:46:49

@DidoLamenting I don’t want to have antenatal appointments alone because WE are expecting a child and I want my husband involved the entire way. So does he. Yes it’s my body but it’s his child too.
He’s also the man I love and want by my side. In no way does this mean that all women have to feel this way but I’d hazard a guess that most do if they have the choice.

I am not being a child feeling this way. I have worked in 4 continents of the world alone. I have passed kidney stones alone. I was mugged in a South American city alone. Flown long haul alone. Bought a house alone. Lived my life as a strong, professional, independent woman.

I am no child and neither am I or other woman being infantile wanting our partners by our side.

It’s not a question of not being able to cope. It’s a question of choice and love and basic human need.

MoltenLasagne Mon 21-Sep-20 12:45:33

Prior to covid happening, changes to maternity care were based on understanding the changing evidence. In some cases, such as allowing partners on maternity wards this was then used as an excuse for cost cutting and reducing staffing meaning there are now fewer staff to patients than when partners were not allowed.

Since covid, many of these services that were evidence based have been deemed as "nice to have" and summarily cut without a corresponding replacement of extra staff. It is no surprise that this is having an impact on outcomes, whether that is increase in still births (reported by one London hospital recently), increase in maternal injuries or worse maternal mental health. Add on to that the cut of postnatal services and we are looking to have a very worrying situation on our hands.

MillyMollyFarmer Mon 21-Sep-20 12:39:12

Having a birthing partner improves birth outcomes. So to simply dismiss those facts and repeatedly say women don’t need support is just nonsense. Sexist nonsense.

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MillyMollyFarmer Mon 21-Sep-20 12:38:00

Women needing support does not equate to them being infantilised. What a ridiculous comment. It is sexist to tell women if they can’t cope with something serious alone that they are behaving like children. I’m not sure why you keep commenting the same thing. This is meant to be a support site.

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DidoLamenting Mon 21-Sep-20 12:35:24


and attend antenatal appointments alone

And so what? They are women, not children

That's pretty a misogynistic viewpoint in itself. It's one thing to provide valuable debate and another to reduce the experience of all women to the limitations of your own

Provide debate as long as it supports the prevailing viewpoint? Why does feminism seek to infantilise women?

DidoLamenting Mon 21-Sep-20 12:33:05

Is feminism all about infantilising women? Seems that way.

MillyMollyFarmer Mon 21-Sep-20 12:21:33

We’re discussing this campaign and the guidelines some trusts are ignoring. The focus is maternity care. As I just said, doctors are concerned at the effect this is having on their patients and don’t want these restrictions. What ‘word’ for female HCPs would you like to have that’s relevant to the thread topic? I hope it’s not another attempt to minimise mothers suffering or prioritise someone else’s needs.

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ifonlyus Mon 21-Sep-20 12:20:22

Also - I am so sorry to read everyone's sad stories on here, either those of going through loss alone or traumatic births.

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