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Feminism: Sex & gender discussions

I think I may be a feminist

18 replies

Everydayisalearningday · 12/07/2020 17:54

It’s only took me to 46 and it’s due to my name being Karen and trying to understand what the hell has been going on with my name. I hate the negative attention of my name don’t get me wrong and I’ve been swerving reading threads about it when I’m feeling sensitive but mostly I’m angry about the Misogyny behind it, but on a positive it’s finally made me read the feminism thread and get up to speed with all the terminology that can make it all difficult to understand, once I’ve found my feet a bit more I’m sure you’ll be hearing from me again soon, in the meantime thank you for educating me and if there’s anything you think I’d benefit from reading I’m all ears

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ChampagneCommunist · 12/07/2020 17:59

Hello!

IMHO, if you want equal pay for equal work, that makes you a feminist. As do lots of other things, but that's an easy one to agree with. Grin

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highame · 12/07/2020 18:00

We're all feminists. Loads to read, lots of people joining in because the debate has heated up with all that lovely sunlight. I only became aware of how far all of this had gone last year when I completed the Equality survey about Transgender. Eventually found MN. Voices of women getting louder. Welcome😊

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ErrolTheDragon · 12/07/2020 18:11

Welcome.Smile
I think in 21st century Britain, it's quite easy to jog along thinking women have equality, the battle for women's rights is done and dusted - until something either in your own life or observation of other women makes you realise it unfortunately isn't so.

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Odense · 12/07/2020 18:15

@ErrolTheDragon

Welcome.Smile
I think in 21st century Britain, it's quite easy to jog along thinking women have equality, the battle for women's rights is done and dusted - until something either in your own life or observation of other women makes you realise it unfortunately isn't so.

So true

I remember my own personal crunching of gears moment.
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wellbehavedwomen · 12/07/2020 18:17

Hey, @Everydayisalearningday, and welcome.

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Everydayisalearningday · 12/07/2020 18:18

I suppose I’ve always been one in theory but in practice life dealt me a hand that left me with a lot of other things to deal with and less time to invest in getting up to speed with confusing terminology, but I have two teen dd’s and dd15 is becoming more woke by the day and I get it who wasn’t idealistic as a teen, but I have a responsibility to them to give them a wider perspective and hopefully food for thought

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Everydayisalearningday · 12/07/2020 18:20

And thank you all for the welcome

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JellySlice · 12/07/2020 18:29

Welcome Smile

I was reluctant to embrace the term 'feminist', partly because I didn't understand what the difference was between all the different 'feminisms', but mostly because I thought it meant I had to accept a whole doctrine. A bit like being a convert to a religion.

But now I understand that it doesn't matter. I still don't understand the difference between Radical/Liberal/4th Wave/Whatever Feminism. What I do understand is that biology matters, that most of what we consider 'feminine' is just stereotypes, and that women and girls are disadvantaged because of our biology and the stereotypes imposed upon us.

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wellbehavedwomen · 12/07/2020 18:32

I've found some pieces especially useful, myself, so I link them here in case you do as well.

A really eye-opening one is by a (young, as it happens) well-respected researcher into victimisation of women, who also helped found a charity to support men, and talks about the very different responses she gets to both roles here.

There's an article here with lots of interesting links, and thought-provoking statistics. It's about the trans issue, but necessarily also provides some appalling evidence on women's treatment more generally, as a sex class.

Sharron Davies also did a brilliant BBC Hard Talk on the sports issue.

And a woman who runs a charity for women escaping domestic violence has talked about how essential it is that they're single sex, here.

And a piece on why women traumatised by male violence (and 95% of violent crime is male; 98-99.5% of sexual violence male) need single sex provision, here.

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wellbehavedwomen · 12/07/2020 18:35

@Everydayisalearningday

I suppose I’ve always been one in theory but in practice life dealt me a hand that left me with a lot of other things to deal with and less time to invest in getting up to speed with confusing terminology, but I have two teen dd’s and dd15 is becoming more woke by the day and I get it who wasn’t idealistic as a teen, but I have a responsibility to them to give them a wider perspective and hopefully food for thought

I get that. I have two disabled children, and life can get overwhelming in domestic, day to day terms, can't it? All the present mess rather passed me by for some years. It came as a huge shock, to find that the ability to even define ourselves as women, with shared biology, was now under attack, and so was single sex provision even being legal in the future.

I think a lot of us are in the same boat. Disoriented, shocked, and scared for our daughters. It all seems so extraordinary, once you break through the soothing mantras and start dealing with the actual facts.
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RednaxelasLunch · 12/07/2020 19:19

Thanks for links @wellbehavedwomen

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gardenbird48 · 12/07/2020 19:23

I think I’m a feminist too :-))) I’m ideologically isolated at home and with friends so interacting here is saving my sanity. Thank you all

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noblegiraffe · 12/07/2020 19:30

You MUST read Invisible Women by Caroline Criado-Perez. Totally eye-opening to a lot of things.

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Everydayisalearningday · 12/07/2020 21:00

@RednaxelasLunch

Thanks for links *@wellbehavedwomen*

Thanks from me too just got through it all
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wellbehavedwomen · 12/07/2020 21:15

@noblegiraffe

You MUST read ]]. Totally eye-opening to a lot of things.

Seconding this. Really makes you see the world completely differently, after.

Hope the links were helpful. There are always more from other people if some ideas don't really feel right to you - that's the beauty of a site this busy, I think.
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ScrimpshawTheSecond · 12/07/2020 22:54

Welcome! Brew I think the next wave if feminism is going to be bigger than anything we've seen yet. Smile

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Dogman · 12/07/2020 23:43

I’ll join you as a former and just now reformed lurker. I spent my twenties thinking feminists where some throw back to an earlier era, my thirties realising the battle wasn’t won and my forties to date getting progressively angrier. I’m going to be such a joy when the menopause hits! I’ve also realised that I’m apparently a T&£f (not sure that term is allowed), who knew! I’ve never been a radical anything but I have a DD and a DS and as much as I would like to just keep baking and going on lovely country walks I cannot look in the mirror and feel like I’ve done my best for them if I don’t stand in my own small way against the hyper gendered world in which we live, where my son can’t cry and young men commit suicide at an alarming rate and my daughter is considered as some form of support human to be thrown under the bus at the behest of male bodied and brained people. I’m still reading, still learning. I will get plenty of things wrong but I will approach everything with an open and critical mind. I will remain empathetic. I don’t hate anyone. I see so many people walking hard paths and can only imagine their pain, and would lessen it if I could, but not at the cost of causing pain to other disenfranchised and marginalised groups.

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Everydayisalearningday · 13/07/2020 10:06

Just had a lovely reply from JK Rowlings office made me feel quite teary middle aged hormones lol. All that’s happening really has brought it home to me how much my circumstances have made me lose myself, my strength of character my confidence, but I realise that if too many of us feel that way, too weary to care about what’s going on around us, we could end up living in a world we .............(I couldn’t decide the right word to end on, you choose)

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