Trying to understand the hate trans people get on here.

[Kelcat9494]

Hello,

Firstly I want to say I am not attacking anyone on this forum and I expect the same respect as we are all entitled to an opinion and I am genuinely interested in the reasons why transgender people get so much hate on here:

Firstly I see a lot about not wanting to share bathrooms with trans women as it's a women's safe space - I don't really understand this because to be honest when I'm sat in the cubicle doing my business, I don't think about the persons genitals next to me, it's all very private as you know. The only thing we'd share is the sinks and I don't see a problem with that really. I did read a post about a abuse survivor not wanting to the share the bathroom with someone with a penis (I'm really sorry that the person went through the abuse but that isn't trans people's fault, the fault is with the abuser alone) but in reality a trans person is more at risk in the bathroom and you have no idea whether they are pre op or post op as again in the bathrooms I've been in we don't show each other our genitalia. They are genuinely just doing their human business in the same room as you so don't understand the problem, actually I suppose people are afraid some odd men would use being transgender as an excuse to use the woman's bathroom but that's not trans women's fault also by this logic if we don't want trans women in the bathroom then we should have transmen in there (either pre op or post op), I've posted some pictures below of transmen and woman, would you really want the trans women in men's bathroom and the transmen in the womens?? (I can only post three but you get my point).

I know JKRowling posted about periods and a lot of people jumped on it to say only women have periods and whatever, this isn't true though is it? Some biological women aren't able to have periods or carry a pregnancy or be able to give birth so if we don't see that as a problem as we recognise it's a biological issue then why is trans-men having a period a problem and trans women not having one an issue? And who actually cares? There's enough tampax to go around, maybe let's focus on making them free for women and transmen as I for one is sick of paying for a "luxury item" I need every month due to no fault of my own.

I can't think of anymore off the top of my head that's been posted but anything in the comments I'm happy to reply to but I genuinely think this forum needs to consider what transgender people actually go through, imagine not feeling like you're in the right body, being attacked and hated for who you are and it's obviously not for fun and games because transgender people actually commit suicide over the issues they face remember #bekind and really think how sharing a bathroom or sharing a tampax would affect you? I don't think you'd kill yourself over it.

[Prawnofthepatriarchy]

It's pretty rude to assume that feminist criticism of gender ideology is uninformed or that any of the issues you raise are in any way novel. In fact threads like yours appear with monotonous regularity on this board.

i genuinely think this forum needs to consider what transgender people actually go through.

I think men who identify as women would do well to consider what women go through. Being kind is a one street with TRAs. We are not your support humans.

[WorkingItOutAsIGo]

Welcome to Mumsnet and thank you for your interesting first post.

[truthisarevolutionaryact]

I think you've misunderstood OP. There's no hatred of trans people on here. This is the Feminism & Women's rights board and one of the things that women talk on here is about women's rights to same sex sport, refuges, prisons, spaces where women undress and are vulnerable, sex based language etc.
Your post suggests that you haven't really read many of the excellent informed threads on here - stick around and have a read. Like everyone, we can all learn.

[LillianBland]

Thank you for your opinion. I shall place it in my lessons on how to dismiss women’s rights box for reading later.

[Furx]

You do realise a lot of us on here ARE trans, because they can see how damaging the bullshit TRA ideology is.

And guess what... when the shit hits the fan and there’s pushback, it’s going to be the LGB and old skool trans who will suffer. The woke Rainbow warriors will melt back into the woodwork. Leaving us up shit creek.

[hellandhairnets]

I think men who identify as women would do well to consider what women go through. Being kind is a one street with TRAs. We are not your support humans.

This.

I see little evidence of any wish by TRAs to listen to or understand women. It's a feminism board. It's going to be about women's rights and the stuff that affects women.

How about trying to understand the hate women get everywhere—and it is everywhere— just for having the temerity to say "we exist, have our own material needs & deserve rights too."

[Kelcat9494]

@Prawnofthepatriarchy

It's pretty rude to assume that feminist criticism of gender ideology is uninformed or that any of the issues you raise are in any way novel. In fact threads like yours appear with monotonous regularity on this board.

i genuinely think this forum needs to consider what transgender people actually go through.

I think men who identify as women would do well to consider what women go through. Being kind is a one street with TRAs. We are not your support humans.

What would you suggest trans people need to consider? (Genuine question I'm learning)

[ZuttZeVootEeeVro]

Why is women having words to describe ourselves and ourselves alone, and the right to meet without men and their approval wrong?

[andyoldlabour]

"I know JKRowling posted about periods and a lot of people jumped on it to say only women have periods and whatever, this isn't true though is it? Some biological women aren't able to have periods"

The fact that SOME women do not have periods, does not alter the fact that ONLY women have periods, so JKR was quite correct.
You have made exactly the same mistake as all those ignorant people who took part in the Twitter pile on.

[Kelcat9494]

@LillianBland

Thank you for your opinion. I shall place it in my lessons on how to dismiss women’s rights box for reading later.

I don't understand how I'm dismissing women's rights, again I'm learning but I don't really understand how sharing a bathroom or letting transmen have periods affects my rights in anyway?

[ShinyFootball]

'I've been in we don't show each other our genitalia.'

I've heard in some gentlemen's facilities this is a major theme

[Milotic]

I dont hate transgender people and for the most part I'm not even bothered about sharing a bathroom with them.

It's people like my ex I have an issue with considering he told me "the best thing about the GRA is that you'll have no where I cant access".

The current measures that keep that kind of psychopath away from women are being labelled as gate keeping and discriminatory.

Not to mention that a lot of this treating trans women as the same as a woman is damaging to them because TW and womens lived experiences are not the same. Women live things no TW ever will. TW have usually lived through experiences a woman will process differently due to societal constructs. And yes those constructs should be changed but dealing with the result of them here and now, treating these people as if they were born female is simply not the way forward.

I have an identity disorder myself. And my opinion is that SOME trans people like my ex are suffering the same. They also behave the same as I would if I were encouraged to dissociate and live in that constant mindset as my "other".

[BernardBlackMissesLangCleg]

What would you suggest trans people need to consider? (Genuine question I'm learning)

why do you think the way a person dresses or wants to behave makes them a man or a woman?

[LesNanas]

They need to consider the fact that ingrained male privilege is making them not only (1) aggressively erode women’s hard-won rights but also (2) attempt to redefine the category of ‘woman’.

[ShinyFootball]

Sharing a bathroom?

At a b and b or something? Well it happens. If a person was in the bath you might get an eyeful!

Or do you mean toilets?

Tell us what you think about prisons and sports pls.

[Datun]

Trans people post on here, OP, and the parents of trans children, and the children of trans parents. We talk all the time to trans people and to people who have trans people in their lives.

There are, for example, at least three or 4000 posts devoted to the wives of transwomen.

It doesn't get nearer to the coalface than that.

We want the law, as it stands, to be upheld.

Unless, of course, you think that women's current right, in law, to sex segregation should be withdrawn?

[Kelcat9494]

@BernardBlackMissesLangCleg

What would you suggest trans people need to consider? (Genuine question I'm learning)

why do you think the way a person dresses or wants to behave makes them a man or a woman?

I'm not saying the way a person dresses or behaves makes them male or female. Personally to me that's a different kettle of fish, again I'm
learning but my impression of trans people are those who don't identify with the gender of their body and go through procedures (whether it be the full blown transition or taking medication) to make them identify more with the gender they feel they are.

[Milotic]

As for considering what transgender people go through. Consider what I went through at the hands of someone blatantly suffering from a serious dissociative identity disorder, because he calls it a female personality and hides under the trans umbrella.

And If he should be treated as a female for displaying the exact same symptoms as me, then should my other personality be treated as a 14 year old? The age it was split at and remains stunted at? Surely you agree that if identity is valid then if I commit a crime I should be treated as a minor.

[picklemewalnuts]

First sentence "I am genuinely interested in the reasons why transgender people get so much hate on here"

Show me the hate?

Discussing female rights on a feminist forum is not hate.

[TheFormerPorpentinaScamander]

only women have periods and whatever, this isn't true though is it? Some biological women aren't able to have periods or carry a pregnancy or be able to give birth so if we don't see that as a problem as we recognise it's a biological issue then why is trans-men having a period a problem and trans women not having one an issue?
Yes it is true. "Only women have periods" is not the same as "not all women have periods"

I genuinely think this forum needs to consider what transgender people actually go through, imagine not feeling like you're in the right body, being attacked and hated for who you are Trans people have my sympathy. It can't be easy for them. But it's not hard for most women to imagine how it feels to be attacked because of who they are. Rape statistics speak for themselves. I'm a CSA survivor. My brother was never abused. Not hard to work out why.

[truthisarevolutionaryact]

Have you thought about sport OP? Should Usain Bolt be able to self identify as a woman and compete in the women's 100m? Is that fair to women?

[TheSingingKettle49]

OP I suggest you try looking at all the issues you’ve raised through the eyes of the most vulnerable woman you can imagine, try going into the world and speaking to some people who have not had privileged lives and the ask yourself why you’re so keen to give other people’s rights away just because you personally have no problem with it.

[LunchBoxPolice]

The only thing we'd share is the sinks and I don't see a problem with that really. I did read a post about a abuse survivor not wanting to the share the bathroom with someone with a penis (I'm really sorry that the person went through the abuse but that isn't trans people's fault, the fault is with the abuser alone)

Why bother separating toilets into male and female at all then? Let men into women’s toilets, since it’s the individual abusers fault and women shouldn’t worry.

Or is it just trans women who need to feel safe?

[AnyOldPrion]

this forum needs to consider what transgender people actually go through.

Not sure why you think we haven’t. Traumatic experiences and mental illness are wholly irrelevant to which sex you are. If a gay man has been bullied relentlessly in male spaces, would you advocate for him to use women’s spaces too?

Also those currently claiming this trauma include cross-dressing men and transvestites. There was little objection from women when transsexual males were using our spaces, so then more and more men decided to jump on that bandwagon. At what point do women get to say “stop”? Or is that for men to decide?