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Why do transgender people change their names when they transition?

(71 Posts)
BowermansNose Fri 14-Feb-20 08:23:24

I was just thinking about some of the inconsistencies in genderism ideology and I thought of one that hadn't struck me before (probably says more about me).

One of the gender arguments is that a woman can have a lady penis, and they don't have a man's body, they are women, and it's their body.

If this is all true, why can't Kevin be a woman's name and Sally be a boy's name? Why do we have male and female names at all, if male and female don't mean anything?

ThinEndoftheWedge Fri 14-Feb-20 08:32:10

I was just thinking about some of the inconsistencies in genderism ideology and I thought of one that hadn't struck me before (probably says more about me)

No it doesn’t say anything about you - the whole thing is full of inconsistencies, I’m impressed you manage to keep up!

I don’t know. Would like other views too on this.

We have trans men giving birth who state giving birth is not a uniquely female experience but misgendering is a sackable offence?

Babdoc Fri 14-Feb-20 08:33:13

OP, you are making the mistake of expecting logic and consistency from a completely illogical ideology.
If they can’t even define what a woman is, or what they are transing from or to, or how a human actually changes sex at all, why should there be any rationale in their names?

isabellerossignol Fri 14-Feb-20 08:34:35

The whole thing is so filled with inconsistencies and illogical ideas and blatantly anti-science ideas, so it's not surprising that this is just one more inconsistency to add to the list. Although until I read your post, I hadn't actually thought about the name thing before!

It's almost as if it isn't really about being one's true self at all, but about the power play of insisting that other people give you the validation that you crave...

Lojoh Fri 14-Feb-20 08:40:18

It's a broad church, so there will always be inconsistencies. Not everyone believes the same things or agrees with each other. So many trans people do not change their name.

But typically many trans people posit two aspects of gender: gender identity (what you feel internally) and gender expression (how you dress, what you wear, body language etc). When people talk about their body being a woman's body, they mean they believe that gender identity is the defining characteristic of manhood or womanhood. That it trumps all other characteristics. That it is necessary and sufficient.

Things like hair, dress, names, (AND for some, sexed characteristics) are sorted into gender expression in this taxonomy. So someone with an internal gender identity of woman may also express this gender with feminine signalling like a feminine name, long hair, dresses, if they wish. But they also may not.

The part that is proposed as feminist is saying that no woman has to perform gender in order to gain admission, so nothing in the gender expression box either admits or disbars one from womanhood. The radfem part says women can resist gender and the libfem part says women may choose and in fact be empowered by gender expression.

If you combine these ideas you can see that a transwoman could reasonably consider themself to be enacting a feminist ideology by changing their name to Betty and taking up pole dancing.

I don't agree with these arguments and do not have a gender identity, but that's what they are.

ladybee28 Fri 14-Feb-20 08:58:26

@Lojoh that was incredibly clear and helpfully explained; thank you so much.

I really work to educate myself on this debate – and I still find myself tied in knots a lot of the time.

Posts like yours, expressed in this way, are so helpful.

Thank you.

AppleTree76 Fri 14-Feb-20 09:02:34

Because they want too, that should be a good enough reason!!

JillAmanda Fri 14-Feb-20 09:07:55

Because they want too, that should be a good enough reason!!

That’s pretty much the argument they use for everything tbh. Why should they use women’s bathrooms... should they infiltrate women’s sports... 😏

OldCrone Fri 14-Feb-20 09:08:33

It's almost as if it isn't really about being one's true self at all, but about the power play of insisting that other people give you the validation that you crave...

It is. That's the only thing it is. It's not about being one's true self, it's about convincing other people that you are something you are not. Otherwise why would anyone talk about 'passing' as the opposite sex?

Being your true self would be about self acceptance and expressing your own personality regardless of what sex you are.

ahumanfemale Fri 14-Feb-20 09:17:36

It's partially about power. Mainly about narcissism. The whole point is that people KNOW. There's no point transitioning if nobody can tell. And if you get to make it a bit awkward, put people on the back foot, all the better.

The idea of someone transitioning, not telling anybody, no surgery hormones or clothes change is really quite funny! Which highlights how it's a social same more than anything else.

ahumanfemale Fri 14-Feb-20 09:18:20

*a social game

ErrolTheDragon Fri 14-Feb-20 09:20:05

Isn't it simply because names are gendered, and they want to adopt the gender which isn't associated with their actual sex? The same reason as you may find a transwoman wearing a skirt on a cold day when all the women are sensibly in trousers, or wearing more makeup or whatever.

For some it may be a sort of play acting, assuming a role. 'Gender fluid' Bunce changes his name from Phillip to Phillipa when donning a frock and wig.

Fieldofgreycorn Fri 14-Feb-20 09:21:46

Otherwise why would anyone talk about 'passing' as the opposite sex?

Because some of them believe they are (internally), or should be the opposite sex, so ‘passing’ means being seen as they see themself.

mummmy2017 Fri 14-Feb-20 09:23:18

So far this year I have seen 3 dress wearing, make up wearing people.
All over 6 foot with full beards, one was called Julie.
My brain hurts.

Amalfimamma Fri 14-Feb-20 09:26:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Amalfimamma Fri 14-Feb-20 09:27:47

Wrong thread have self reported 🙄

itsUnderMyPillow Fri 14-Feb-20 09:31:03

It's part of their 'new me' I guess . Each to their own. I'm was past caring what other folks get up to these days . I find myself say "that's nice dear' quite a lot these days, while inwardly thing "WTAF!!" It's just easier to be nice .

womaninblue Fri 14-Feb-20 09:32:08

The first transwoman I knew was the long-term boyfriend of my best friend. It was in the 90s and as his transition progressed (he went from cross-dressing at weekends to going to the Charing Cross clinic and getting hormones etc) he became Diana and was upset to find that most of the other transitioners encountered on the journey were also called Diana. I got the distinct impression that they selected the Ur-female of the day to model themselves on.

It's all fantasy, I suspect. I've never come across a transwoman called Pat or Joyce or Barbara.

itsUnderMyPillow Fri 14-Feb-20 09:32:45

Geeze loads of typos there ! Sorry! If anyone needs a translation let me know !

dalishelf Fri 14-Feb-20 09:41:10

My personal view (which may be wrong) is that transitioning is about becoming your true self. This includes choosing a new name for yourself, to fully become that new version of you, often what people call the 'true' version of themselves.

My friend who is currently transitioning asked their parents to give them a new name, like they did when they were born.

NonnyMouse1337 Fri 14-Feb-20 09:42:45

he became Diana and was upset to find that most of the other transitioners encountered on the journey were also called Diana

😂😂😂😂

SpartacusLangClegicus Fri 14-Feb-20 09:44:34

The name is really important as it's the first indicator that this person needs special treatment in terms of access, language and support, when a person who appears to be a man tells you his name is Daphne, or a person who appears to be female tells you her name is Godfrey, you know immediately what is expected of you.

It is, essentially, a means to force compliance.

Babieseverywhere Fri 14-Feb-20 09:45:08

Gendered names change with the times and cultures anyway.

I adored the wrestler Big Daddy when I was little and clearly remember his name was Shirley Crabtree !

Many names are given to more girls in one country and more boys in another aka Brooke, Ashley etc.

I do not care if a male (*whatever gender they choose to identify as) changes his name to any other.

I won't lie and use the incorrect pronouns for anyone, happy to use they or name instead, as my female upbringing makes me uncomfortable to be rude, especially to a person who might hurt me.

I also don't care when males* wear dresses and skirts. Go for it. We might end up with dresses in bigger sizes WITH pockets! Plus many men already wear dresses, skirts, kilts and robes...it is just fabric.

I don't accept wearing skirts or dresses alters anything about a person, it is only clothing.

Male* people are still unwelcome in women only space, it is irrelevant what they are wearing or what their name is.

NonnyMouse1337 Fri 14-Feb-20 09:46:08

My friend who is currently transitioning asked their parents to give them a new name, like they did when they were born.

What the actual fuck?! They are a grown adult. They can choose a new name for themselves.
They have to rope their poor parents into this as well?

JillAmanda Fri 14-Feb-20 09:52:27

*What the actual fuck?! They are a grown adult. They can choose a new name for themselves.
They have to rope their poor parents into this as well?*

I know right?! 🙄🙄🙄

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