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"Micro" acts of every day sexism...

(390 Posts)
GunpowderGelatine Wed 13-Nov-19 11:43:00 know the kind of things that, if you didn't look for it you wouldn't even notice?

For example, I'm at hospital today for an outpatient appointment. I noticed that when the staff (Male and female) would call out for patients for their appointment, they would use women's full names (e.g. "Emily Dixon?") and for men they'd use their salutation ("Mr Roberts?"). Every. Single. Time.

I feel like if we look out for things like these we'd notice a lot more? Is it just me going mad or do other people have things like this happen?

GunpowderGelatine Wed 13-Nov-19 11:43:50

And not knowing if someone is a Miss, Mrs or Ms is no excuse - it's on the patient record.

Aderyn19 Wed 13-Nov-19 11:47:57

I'm shamelessly place marking because in all honesty I never notice any micro acts of sexism. But then again I am notoriously unobservant, so I'm curious.

sillysmiles Wed 13-Nov-19 11:50:34

I'm also place marking as I think this is fascinating topic and an interesting observation. I feel like after reading Invisible Women that it is everywhere!

BertrandRussell Wed 13-Nov-19 11:51:47

Too many to mention. Depressingly many women, and many mumsnetters will do the “Be thankful that’s all you’ve got to worry about” routine.
As somebody once said “You don’t notice all the little drips until you’ve got a sodding great brimming bucketful”

Aderyn19 Wed 13-Nov-19 11:55:43

Looking back, I think there were jobs I didn't get because, as a young woman, I was a 'risk' because I might want maternity leave at some point. I remember losing out to men who were as good as me but not better. But I don't think that counts as micro sexism.

Mercedes519 Wed 13-Nov-19 11:57:35

Aderyn19 that's full on sexism!

I noticed this at the weekend when we went to the car showroom. They started talking to DH and only talked to me once DH had pointed out that it was MY car we were looking for.

sashh Wed 13-Nov-19 12:10:33

A 2018 GCSE maths paper

"A manager pays a bonus to his three managers and seven sales men..."

Check you driving licence, women hav a title, men don't.

deydododatdodontdeydo Wed 13-Nov-19 12:19:01

Check you driving licence, women hav a title, men don't.

Isn't it the other way round?

Judashascomeintosomemoney Wed 13-Nov-19 12:19:33

This is a micro, but so bloody irritating. There was a TV clip my DD and I saw last night, (some sort of rescue at sea program I think) with events being recounted by a male witness. He described how he’d watched as a ‘lady kayaker’ was winched to safety by the rescue team. My DD said ‘Yeah, it was the only way she could escape the everyday sexism of being described as a lady kayaker instead of, you know, a kayaker!’
She’s 14, but she’s spotting it already. Not sure if that’s good or bad tbh.

Kit19 Wed 13-Nov-19 12:20:26

I remember trying to book a hotel for my friend & I, were both female & she’s a doctor. The on line form wouldn’t allow me to put her title as doctor. I tried with a male name and it worked :/

Judashascomeintosomemoney Wed 13-Nov-19 12:21:24

(She’s very familiar with the title‘every day sexism’ cos I mutter it often, so I guess she’s a bit more attuned to it now)

TreestumpsAndTrampolines Wed 13-Nov-19 12:22:01

My UK driving license had a title, my European one doesn't.

DP's UK driving license doesn't.

I would assume it's because women have the choice of 3, and men only have one, so they include it, so it's not the driving license that's sexist per se, but the whole idea that women have a title to reflect their marital status.

Lemongrasssugar Wed 13-Nov-19 12:22:10

I bought a kettlebell from argos for myself and the guy behind the counter insisted on giving it to my husband.

EmpressLesbianInChair Wed 13-Nov-19 12:22:59

Unnecessary touches, and then looks of amused confusion when you express annoyance.

I swear the next time a man puts his hands on my waist from behind to move me, my booted foot is going to shoot straight back.

MadamBatty Wed 13-Nov-19 12:35:13

Empress any man who does that gets me stepping back on his foot hard & a I didn’t see you there smile

EmpressLesbianInChair Wed 13-Nov-19 12:35:27


elQuintoConyo Wed 13-Nov-19 12:37:25

Giving me the salad and my husband the steak - waitress or waiter, doesn't matter. Every. Single. Time.

VictoriaSpongeBob Wed 13-Nov-19 12:38:22

At a previous job i was always asked to make guests drinks, clear food from meetings I wasn't in and and on one occasion Hoover the reception before a client arrived. It wasn't my job I work in HR and just happened to be the only woman who worked there.

BoogieFeet Wed 13-Nov-19 12:44:21

Ah yes, my veggie husband and I often have to swap the plates found as he is given the manly steak/burger and me the veggie option smile

Booked a holiday online recently and paid with my credit card, specified myself as lead passenger and the contact for the holiday. Still listed below my husband when I login to view holiday details.

Fishcakey Wed 13-Nov-19 12:46:16

Is it awful that I never notice these things and that even pointed out, I can't get aggrieved about it!

NonnyMouse1337 Wed 13-Nov-19 12:47:07

Wtf... That's proper sexism VictoriaSpongeBob shock

Fishcakey Wed 13-Nov-19 12:47:22

Actually I do notice one thing but it does that make me laugh - bar people always give my Guinness to my husband and his girly Bud Light to me. Every single time!

RetreatingWeasels Wed 13-Nov-19 12:49:46

Many years ago DH went to buy a new vacuum cleaner and the salesman kept trying to talk to me. I had only gone along for the ride and was less than interested in the cleaner.

Sad that it's still going on.

WatchingTheMoon Wed 13-Nov-19 12:50:22

I WISH I didn't notice but here I am every day getting wound up by the millions of things I see happening around me.

My latest one is people saying that if I have a baby girl (I'm pregnant), it will be great cos we can have girly days out and get our nails done.

If I can muster the energy to even cut my nails, I consider it top quality grooming these days but no, as I am a woman, I must be longing for a daughter so we can go and make ourselves look attractive to men.

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