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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Am I wrong ??

28 replies

Rockcar101 · 11/09/2019 17:18

I appear to have been booted from a midwifery Facebook group for sticking my head over the parapet ! Someone posted a repost from badass birthmother of a transgender man birthing . There was lots of awwwws and how wonderful . I appear to have been removed , not entirely sure of the circumstances as I was driving to work but I commented that I didn't get was was so aww amazing and newsworthy about a biological woman doing what millions do every day ( every birth is amazing but it was the context of the pictures and the comments that this was something really super dooper amazing and special ) There was one your a transphobiecomment than I was removed it seems .
I can't get my head round this , these are midwives and wannabe midwives .... they can't seem to understand I believe that no one apart from a biological woman can birth ! I don't care if the parents identify as men , women or llamas is they are happy and their child is loved and cared for crack on and I will refer to them how they wish to identify but the only person who possibly gave birth to that child was a biological woman . Men do not have a uterus ......👀

I'm fairly new to all this TR stuff I have to admit this section of Mumsnet goes way over my head a lot of the time but I'm reading and I'm trying to learn ......FFS midwives though , I'm feeling rather upset for women tonight , their pictures of birth are just standard , identify as a male and it's the best thing ever 🙁
I also took offence to a comment about "jealous Cis women " ( why am I jealous of something I can and have done myself 🧐) but that appears to have been glossed over .
Obviously my views are so disgusting I have been immediate removed , Shame really as I'm always happy for a debate and if I'm wrong then show me but this appears to have been not allowed .

Show me he way here , am I totally wrong in my thinking ? I'm struggling .

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TaskMistress · 11/09/2019 17:25

Nope you are not wrong- the world has gone mad, we're down the rabbit hole!

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AnneLovesGilbert · 11/09/2019 17:28

Course you’re not. Biological female has baby not a shocker.

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Hannah021 · 11/09/2019 17:35

I was having a conversation with a trans supporter, and he was saying biological men can give birth too too (!!), have u not seen bla bla uterus implants on the news... I was like, oh I see, so you've taken a biological woman's uterus and tried to stick it into a male and called it a birth !!

Give me a break.
YANBU.

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pachyderm · 11/09/2019 17:35

No you're not wrong. You could also have wondered why it's wrong to drink alcohol, smoke or eat soft cheese during pregnancy but it's ok to subject your female body to shedloads of testosterone for years and then stop to get pregnant, with very little research done on possible effects on your baby.

But you know, brave and stunning.

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Ereshkigal · 11/09/2019 17:42

was like, oh I see, so you've taken a biological woman's uterus and tried to stick it into a male and called it a birth !!

This has never ever happened. It's illegal currently in this country and the risks and difficulties are prohibitive.

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Rockcar101 · 11/09/2019 17:47

It was just the nauseating fawning over the picture . Like wow ... a man . It was a lovely picture but i very much felt that if it was a woman it would have been glossed over a couple of posts and that was that .

I do very much suspect I am not the only one on that site that feels like that however rest assured no one else will say a word if they want to remain members .

I worry for my daughters future 😩

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Hannah021 · 11/09/2019 17:51

@Ereshkigal well the male died cuz his body rejected it, but yes it happened. Given that it was a very long time ago and science had moved forward, I'm unsure what's current in this subject, although i can't see why others anywhere in the world wouldn't try again!

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Fraggling · 11/09/2019 17:52

Interesting how transmen only seem to be in the news when they give birth, isn't it.

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BarbaraStrozzi · 11/09/2019 18:03

Hannah I believe that was decades ago - the real life patient behind the film the "Danish Girl". They certainly didn't give birth, and as you correctly point out, died from complications of their own body rejecting the uterus.

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HandsOffMyRights · 11/09/2019 18:03

Isn't it just, Fraggling!

Tiresome. Those lemmings know only females can give birth.

It's just a classic Emperor's New Clothes, but alarming given their profession.

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Mlou32 · 11/09/2019 18:18

You are not wrong. People are so desperate to be 'woke' these days; the world is going crazy.

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OhHolyJesus · 11/09/2019 18:34

That's it Fraggling the only time transman are in the news it's when they are detransitioning or having a baby. Or maybe talking about their mastectomies. Or need for a mastectomy over and above the need of say a breast cancer patient.

I'm yet to read an article about a transman winning a race/competition or wanting to use the men's toilets.

You're not wrong OP it's just another example of a woman being silenced for telling the truth. It's deeply troubling that the midwifery profession has been captured as it's obviously based on biology and there's a reason why terminology for women's bodies is used.

I'm waiting to hear the trans term for a uterus - there's chestfeeding as the word breasts is so offensive - what's the trans term for a womb?

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LordRandallXV · 11/09/2019 20:05

I can't get my head round this , these are midwives and wannabe midwives .... they can't seem to understand I believe that no one apart from a biological woman can birth ! I don't care if the parents identify as men , women or llamas is they are happy and their child is loved and cared for crack on and I will refer to them how they wish to identify but the only person who possibly gave birth to that child was a biological woman . Men do not have a uterus.

They probably weren't interested in your opinion or having a debate and just wanted to congratulate this individual.

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Sallycanwait1 · 11/09/2019 20:14

I don't know why "men" giving birth is being pushed so much all of a sudden. It's old news, that guy in the USA did it like 20 years ago.

At the time people thought it was an Arnold Schwarzenegger in junior type thing. Turned out he was just a bearded lady transman so people lost interest.

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LordProfFekkoThePenguinPhD · 11/09/2019 20:16

Well it’s a good way to quickly identify a whole batch of idiots.

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BooseysMom · 11/09/2019 20:49

Nope you are not wrong- the world has gone mad, we're down the rabbit hole!

Yep, completely batshit! Hmm

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womaninthedark · 11/09/2019 20:52

A lot of young women (indeed, young people - but it's the women who have most to lose, like their fucking identity) have swallowed this stuff whole. They think anyone who doesn't is an outrageous bigot.

I think the world has gone crazy. I'm glad I'm old.

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Rockcar101 · 11/09/2019 20:58

They probably weren't interested in your opinion or having a debate and just wanted to congratulate this individual.

That may be so however why does a picture of a man apparently having birthed elicit such an outpouring of awwww and well done that's so beautiful? Obviously if it's such a normal thing then what that post , why that picture ?

I think that's the most upsetting part , these are midwifes and students and this page prides itself on empowerment of women , except when a man comes into it then it's all fawning and wondrousness..

Thank you to the posters who contribute on here for a very interesting section of Mumsnet btw , I certainly have had my eyes opened today and will be doing some serious reading over the next few days .

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Backintheclosit123 · 11/09/2019 21:07

I certainly have had my eyes opened today and will be doing some serious reading over the next few days

Good on you OP. *warning: there is no going back once your eyes have been opened, and Mumsnet is THE place to do it. I stumbled on this site less than a year ago and have learnt so much.
Flowers to all the mumsnetters who helped me.

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OvaHere · 11/09/2019 21:13

No you're not wrong.

It's particularly infuriating to see it from midwives and trainees who will have no trouble awareness raising about the harms of tobacco, alcohol, caffeine, blue cheese, pain meds etc... pose for fertility and pregnancy yet aren't prepared to question what years of testosterone may do.

Many will also push the benefits of breast feeding relentlessly even to women who have made the choice to opt out or give up through difficulty. But will they point out that an elective mastectomy prior to pregnancy won't give a child the optimum start? I suspect they'll stay silent on that one.

It's utterly ridiculous to create a special class of pregnant women for whom a completely different set of standards apply. It will only be divisive and ultimately harmful in the long run.

We can probably expect some kind of inquiry years from now about failure in duty of care to male identified pregnant females and their babies and it won't be about misgendering.

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CaptainKirksSpookyghost · 11/09/2019 21:17

You aren't wrong of course, but be prepared as the next 7 years is going to get worse and worse as the take over begins and boundaries are totally eroded.

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Gizmo79 · 11/09/2019 21:36

From my personal experience- I find it incredibly worrying how many trans chi.dren are coming through my service with self harm issues even when they are self IDing.

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CaptainKirksSpookyghost · 11/09/2019 21:37

even when they are self IDing

It's almost as if this isn't a solution isn't it?

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JanesKettle · 11/09/2019 22:36

lol, you are not wrong.

It's strange, to find yourself the only person in a large group with 1. your rationality still functioning and 2. not in thrall to groupthink, but feeling strange doesn't make you wrong.

Only females birth. Transmen are female. They conceive, gestate and birth in the same ways other women do.

That they get massive amounts of attention for their 'manly' feat of birthing, and only that, is sexism in action. The midwives in your group are supporting sexism - the only thing a transman (woman) is to be celebrated for is having a baby.

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Qcng · 12/09/2019 00:11

In these Facebook groups it only takes the one "admin" to ban you. There may have been others in the group who actually agree with you, but they'll know to keep their mouth shut now.
Unfortunately the truth now leads to accusations of being some sort of "bigot".

Strange times indeed.

Don't stop talking though. If you're involved in the midwife profession, please, it's important you continue to raise your voice. Join other groups. Speak out at work.

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