My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Feminism: Sex & gender discussions

Remember that grey hair is rarely attractive

159 replies

TheGreysAreComing · 07/08/2019 16:46

5. Remember that grey hair is rarely attractive unless you have the correct combination of skin tone and eye colouring! (You suit clothes in blues, lilacs, greys and pinks and have neutral skin tone and grey/blue eyes).

www.danielfieldmailorder.co.uk/support/?q=1017


Thoughts? Posting this in FWR as I know AIBU will be full of posters who wish to post that actually they do believe grey hair on women is unattractive.. like pubes, and women leaving the house without a chaperone face full of makeup.

Regardless of a person's personal beliefs on grey hair (or any colour) there is something exceptionally sexist and patronising in advising women to remember they are unattractive. Now, now ladies, lest you forget or start to feel confident in your hair colour, you are probably unattractive.

Also, I've known lots of beautiful black women with grey hair btw but not a single one with blue eyes though.. so not sure if this brand counts them or not. Hmm

OP posts:
Report
ScreamingValenta · 07/08/2019 16:50

Ugh. I hate the expectation that women's primary goal in life is to be attractive to men, and the kind of 'how dare you!' attitude towards women who don't actually give a fig.

The 'correct' combination of skin and eye colour - ffs. Oy, you - your combination of skin, eye and hair colour is incorrect - change it at once.

Report
JellySlice · 07/08/2019 16:54

Would they also say

Remember that unhighlighted hair is rarely attractive
Remember that mousy hair is rarely attractive
Remember that non-relaxed Afro hair is rarely attractive

Yes, I agree with you.

What they're actually saying is
Remember that whatever natural, unmodified feature you have is rarely attractive

Report
woodhill · 07/08/2019 16:55

Well stating the obvious isn't it in his interest to make this statement as there is money to be made from products and Hair colouring

It is just rubbish though

Report
GCAcademic · 07/08/2019 16:56

I think I can safely say that I give not a shiny shit if Daniel Field finds me attractive. He’s someone who I haven’t ever given a moment’s thought to. I haven’t dyed my hair and never will, though I do have quite a few greys. One of the best things about being middle-aged is being invisible to men. The last thing I’d want is to go back to the relentless fucking hassle and actual fear I experienced in my 20s when men, apparently, did find me attractive.

Report
TheGreysAreComing · 07/08/2019 16:56

The 'correct' combination of skin and eye colour - ffs. Oy, you - your combination of skin, eye and hair colour is incorrect - change it at once.
I mean, it's your actual natural hair colour. How can it be wrong? Confused

I actually think grey hair looks beautiful on most women and I'm more than keen on men but strangely when mine grew in it was a total different curl to my other hair causing a sort of two layer multi hair system, hence looking into grey coverage which goes someway into disguising the insanity. The other possibility was dying it all grey but I'm worried I will get the tone wrong. Natural grey has lots of different lovely shades, and I'm not sure I can recreate that with home DIY kits.

What I find strange is that silver fox men who as far as I know are in no way differently coloured to women don't seem to have these issues.

OP posts:
Report
SnuggyBuggy · 07/08/2019 16:58

I must admit I think I would like to get a blue rinse when I'm older

Report
TheGreysAreComing · 07/08/2019 16:59

I think I can safely say that I give not a shiny shit if Daniel Field finds me attractive.


I also have a baren field of shiny shits. Which is too bad for Dan as I won't be purchasing his dye because I don't support businesses that tell women they are a bit crap.

OP posts:
Report
TheGreysAreComing · 07/08/2019 17:00

TBF Blue rinses seem to be all the rage with the yoof these days snuggy.

OP posts:
Report
BogglesGoggles · 07/08/2019 17:00

I’m inclined to agree. Grey hair suits very few people as well as their original colour. Lots of things are unattractive, nothing wrong with aknowledging that and sharing an opinion on what is/isn’t aesthetically pleasing. The analysis of who would suit grey is rather over simplified imo. What’s more problematic is the assumption that people will try to cover up grey hair. Not everyone is vain enough to give a shit.

Report
SmellbowSpaceBowl · 07/08/2019 17:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheBigBallOfOil · 07/08/2019 17:01

Remember, Daniel, that being a judgemental vacuous arsewipe is rarely attractive.
Two can play at this game

Report
FWRLurker · 07/08/2019 17:01

I still don’t have any grey but I’m looking forward to it so I’m no longer mistaken for a student quite as often (I’m an academic)!

And wow that is some racist undertones there - Blue or grey are the “correct” eye tone WTAF!

Report
SunnySomer · 07/08/2019 17:01

The reason I chose to go grey after 15 years of dying my hair was because I heard a bunch of male friends congratulating one another one their silver foxiness. I had a complete WTF moment when I thought about the thousands I’d been conned out of in the belief that grey was unattractive when it’s actually beautiful. But doesn’t make hair dye manufacturers any money. They depend on making us feel inadequate

Report
SnuggyBuggy · 07/08/2019 17:02

I've had whiteys since my mid 20s and have a bad feeling I'm going to get Dracula pattern greying rather than an elegant salt and pepper in the next 10 years Grin

Report
TheGreysAreComing · 07/08/2019 17:03

Grey hair suits very few people as well as their original colour. Lots of things are unattractive, nothing wrong with aknowledging that and sharing an opinion on what is/isn’t aesthetically pleasing.


If Mr Field had been asked his opinon and he said, "As a hair colourist it isnt my favourite" that would be one thing. But to remind women that their hair is unattractive when attraction is totally subjective, you move into a different category of wankbadger.

OP posts:
Report
TheGreysAreComing · 07/08/2019 17:04

The reason I chose to go grey after 15 years of dying my hair was because I heard a bunch of male friends congratulating one another one their silver foxiness.

"Their silver foxiness" Grin

OP posts:
Report
TheGreysAreComing · 07/08/2019 17:08

've had whiteys since my mid 20s and have a bad feeling I'm going to get Dracula pattern greying rather than an elegant salt and pepper in the next 10 years

I like the colour in mine, and when I occasionally never straighten it, I really like the effect. But currently they all sort of stand right up? Confused I have curly hair and they don't follow the authorised curl pattern. Hmm

OP posts:
Report
MaybeDoctor · 07/08/2019 17:10

I hear you, but I don’t think Daniel Field is public enemy number one here.

He is running a small mailorder business selling haircare products in Devon. He isn’t Procter & Gamble or the glossy magazines.

Report
ScrimshawTheSecond · 07/08/2019 17:11

Twaddle & bollocks.

I say that as a qualified professional Authority on Who and What is Attractive.

Report
TheGreysAreComing · 07/08/2019 17:14

I hear you, but I don’t think Daniel Field is public enemy number one here.

No, but in this case it makes it harder to pass the buck. At some point he sat down and either wrote that copy or approved it. And it just makes me want to kick him in the probably greying nads. He seems to have a large following on MN though which is how I found the website.

OP posts:
Report
EmilyStar · 07/08/2019 17:19

It’s the double standards here that really irritate me.

Women with grey hair are “reminded” that it’s unattractive and encouraged to dye it.

Men with grey hair, if it’s mentioned at all with regards to attractiveness, tend to get positive comments about “silver foxes.”

Report
Goosefoot · 07/08/2019 17:19

The way that is worded is weird and not very nice.

I would say that, as far as you can be objective about such things, grey hair comes in some different types and shades, and people's skin and hair vary, and sometimes the particular combination you get isn't as flattering as other times.

When I fist started to go grey, it didn't look great. I have fair skin and eyes and light brown hair, and when it started to go grey it seemed to look very dull and unwashed like it had a residue on it. Now it's about a third grey and it looks much better than it did and in fact I think it probably suits my skin colouring which has also become a little softer than when I was younger. I coloured it for a while when it had the muddy look, which in a way I am opposed to, but at the same time I did not like looking sort of ill and unwashed.

My mother has very beautiful silver hair, but she does need to use a rinse on occasion or it starts to look yellow, like she is a big smoker, which she doesn't like. It's not a real effort since she'd be washing it anyway and it's only every eight weeks or so. Overall though I think she likes her hair now more than when she was younger, as it's very dramatic and unusual.

There is also nothing wrong with doing nothing, the reality is just that at some times we may feel like we look a little better than other times.

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

merrymouse · 07/08/2019 17:22

I think Daniel Field's opinion on grey hair is heavily influenced by their range of hair colours.

If they worked out a way to produce a silver hair dye I suspect they would have a dramatic change of opinion.

www.livecolour.com/our-products/silver-hair-dye

Report
MrsFionaCharming · 07/08/2019 17:31

Wtf is a ‘neutral’ skin tone? Surely skin tone is by definition neutral? Or is that some weird race thing I’m not getting?

Report
learieonthewildmoor · 07/08/2019 17:32

My grey hair looks fantastic, thanks Daniel. It’s also in the best condition for years because I’m not applying chemicals to it all the time. I never used to wear blue tones but now they look great on me! What’s going on there?
Unless you are as rich as Nora Ephron, at some point dyed hair isn’t going to look natural: at which point some one other than Daniel will tell us how unattractive mutton dressed as lamb is.
When you are a woman, everything you do is wrong. That’s the point of women, apparently. To be wrong and look after the children.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.