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ManFriday needs you!

(86 Posts)
SwearyG Thu 22-Mar-18 11:56:15

After the runaway success of last week and the traction we have in the media (shitty interviews aside, but we'll ignore those) and they're keen to know what we're doing this week, and what would really help us is numbers. I hope that if we get enough companies to pull their self-ID stuff we can then start getting at the places where more vulnerable women will need protecting, possibly not with public activism but with discourse, but I think that might be us getting ahead of ourselves.

The plan for tomorrow is changing rooms. We know that Topshop, Primark, Marks and Spencer and Urban Outfitters have said that anyone who identifies as a woman can enter the women's changing rooms so the opposite will apply.

Clearly, it won't make a huge amount of impact as a single act in a single shop so we need numbers and social media impact to push this one. I can't dare to hope about the success of last week but I think bringing it to the attention of people who don't know who is allowed in their changing rooms has got to have some impact.

So here's what we need to do:

Pick one of the shops listed

Use one of the changing rooms. You could use the men's as it's man Friday or you could be a horrid man perving in the women's instead. Do what you're comfortable with.

Take photos - they can be of you changing, of the gaps around the curtain, of you outside the men's changing room, if you're brave and take a friend they could be of you inside the changing room taken around the curtain or under the door.

Tweet the company and @ManFriday_ and say something along the lines of how great it was to be in whichever changing room and how nice it was to be around all sorts of people in stages of undress. Say how you appreciate that your feelings are being considered as more important than the safety, privacy and dignity of everyone else in there. You can say stuff about vulnerability too, go to town with your 280 characters.

Don't forget to add the hashtag #manfriday

I know it's something little, but it is something most people would be able to do in a lunch hour or small part of their day and the more people we have the better in the media. We will get better press coverage, and therefore maybe companies rethinking their policies with greater numbers.

Swim England have taken down their guidance, silently, we don't know what they're going to do next, but it does feel like if nothing else we've made people think.

If you're concerned that it won't make a difference, remember that people are still talking about this in the national press in a world where we live in a 24 hour news cycle. Just from two women going for a swim.

RaininSummer Thu 22-Mar-18 13:05:49

I am not brave enough to do this alone either.

borntobequiet Thu 22-Mar-18 13:12:25

Great. I haven't shopped in M&S for ages, some frill infested monstrosity from Per Una will look good slung over the door in the men's fitting rooms.
Or has Per Una improved? Does it still exist?

olderthanyouthink Thu 22-Mar-18 13:17:07

I have been contemplating using the men's loo but don't actually want to make people too uncomfortable or put myself in danger. I wonder if I could rope my BF in as back up.

donquixotedelamancha Thu 22-Mar-18 13:18:34

I felt a total douche for making the men uncomfortable (and also lying to the receptionists) last week, but it seems to have got people talking in plain sight, which is what we want, isn't it?

Take it from a bloke, we don't mind. Men don't want this any more than women.

It's clear that both you and Amy have been thoughtful and considerate in the way you've taken direct action. I thought Amy's performance on TV was convincing precisely because it was quiet and measured, but very firm- a huge contrast with most pro self ID campaigners.

I do think trying to make sure that everyone who participates in direct action is respectful is important. A few loons can really sour the argument- as trans activists have found recently.

SweetGrapes Thu 22-Mar-18 13:20:51

I was at my local Primark a couple of days back and the changing room just said "changing rooms". There was no men/women.

SwearyG Thu 22-Mar-18 13:25:14

So show how vulnerable you are in them? Take a photo of how the curtain doesn't cover the gap. You can do this in women's changing rooms as well on Twitter if you're uncomfortable with going into the men's - highlight our vulnerability. You could be a man popping into the ladies for a perve, it's manfriday after all.

Remember we want to highlight how this affects our safety, privacy and dignity.

athingthateveryoneneeds Thu 22-Mar-18 13:29:21

@Thisisouting I'll pm you.

I will be wearing my manly t-shirt!

YesItsADebate Thu 22-Mar-18 13:31:58

I will be joining SwearyG, armed with my iPhone camera, best ‘startled by Sweary being a pervert’ look, leaflets, badge and my purple she-wee for the loos.

Can’t wait! grin

CapnHaddock Thu 22-Mar-18 13:36:35

I will definitely join in - I can pop to M&S tomorrow. Is there a PDF of the leaflet that I can print?

LastGirlOnTheLeft Thu 22-Mar-18 13:52:35

I wish I could do this - I live and work in a little rural town with none of these shops. For any or the campaigns I can do, I will!

ItsuAddict Thu 22-Mar-18 13:56:27

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BetsyM00 Thu 22-Mar-18 14:40:07

The posters on here that have asked for printable leaflets - I'll pm you a link to a GoogleDoc when I get back from the school run.

It's an A4 sheet with 8 leaflets on it - you'll need to print front and back.

Anyone else wants the link, send me a pm and I'll get to it asap.

BetsyM00 Thu 22-Mar-18 14:41:47

@LastGirlOnTheLeft I'm in the same position so I'm going into men's loos instead. Is that an option, with a male partner in crime?

BlooperReel Thu 22-Mar-18 15:10:10

I have an urban outfitters nearby, challenge accepted!

Testingnamechange1 Thu 22-Mar-18 15:15:38

I would like leaflets too please. And stickers, if anyone has those?

LastGirlOnTheLeft Thu 22-Mar-18 15:22:25

Actually yes Betsy!! We have a small shopping centre near us so I could definitely do that. 👍 I think I might order a T shirt too.

MyBrilliantDisguise Thu 22-Mar-18 15:42:00

I don't think anyone should be taking photos in changing rooms. That wouldn't be allowed by women in a female changing room or vice versa. Everyone deserves their privacy.

SwearyG Thu 22-Mar-18 15:42:58

Only photos of themselves or people they are with, as people often do taking photos to share with friends for opinions.

Beerincomechampagnetastes Thu 22-Mar-18 15:55:32

I have my tshirt, I’m hoping someone can send me a link so I can print off some leaflets?

BetsyM00 Thu 22-Mar-18 17:13:29

Leaflets sent to all that asked smile

CunningOperative Thu 22-Mar-18 17:19:51

@ItsuAddict I'm close to Brent Cross!
Tomorrow we're going to Oxford street for man-fun, but up for it another day

WhyBeDennyDifferent Thu 22-Mar-18 17:25:32

I wonder if there’s a way we could team up for those not so confident? I’m in the NE if anyone wants to team up you can pm me.

hipsterumlaut Thu 22-Mar-18 17:34:26

Interesting idea about identifying as a man and going into the women's changing areas. I wonder if you made it clear you identified as a man while appearing fully female if they would try and kick you out or if they'd say go right in and what the TRAs and the general public would make of that?

MsMcWoodle Thu 22-Mar-18 17:53:23

I can get to Brighton but I'm too scared to go on my own.

BetsyM00 Thu 22-Mar-18 18:11:41

That's the idea hipsterumlaut. Feminine as possible (I believe the term is female bodied self-identified man!) and then if they kick us out we can confirm they are separating changing rooms by sex, which is what we want.

But if they let us in we take our photos and show exactly why it's a bad idea to have let us in. And we want the men in the changing rooms to complain loudly about wanting single-sex spaces.

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