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Feminism: Sex & gender discussions

Do we need a 'Gender Nonconformity Celebration' march/parade?

9 replies

GuardianLions · 23/11/2017 12:04

In my recent searches looking into the recent history of the rise of TRAs I stumbled across old video from 2012 of a lesbian lawyer being harassed for 'transphobia' at a Dyke March by some heterosexuals who 'identify' as lesbian/queer.

It jogged memories of my pre-parent days of going to Pride marches with gay friends and enjoying all the rainbows, subversion and rebellion - yet feeling a bit weird as an impostor. Het, but gender non-conforming/embryonic feminist.

I wonder if the enviable success of Pride marches, has actually led to this current trend of heterosexuals identifying as queer/lesbian/etc (by one member of the couple identifying as trans) - just in order to feel they have 'pride' in something, and a sense of belonging brought by a chosen identity?

Since most people feel restricted by they gender role imposed upon them, how about having a gender non-conformity party/march/parade/fayre thing, where your sexuality, 'trans status', etc is completely irrelevant, so everyone can enjoy a bit of liberation, fun, and subversion, all the fun of the disco, even if just for the day, without feeling like frauds?

It could be great fun thinking of the things you have felt inhibited from doing because of your given 'gender' and using such an event to try them out/explore them in a supportive environment... I can even imagine having a kids' tent where children are encouraged to play with whatever toys they want, having stands for MN 'Let Toys Be Toys' campaigns, etc.

I know everyone has more pressing concerns with the GRA coming up, etc. But I think it could help to stop het people harassing lesbians at dyke marches, men insisting upon a platform at women's marches, etc.

I know the easy answer is - "well go ahead and organise it yourself @GuardianLions, if you think it is worthwhile".

But I am interested in knowing if you think having a gender non-conformity celebration where everyone is included is a good idea.

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Nyx1 · 23/11/2017 12:48

Sadly I think it would be hijacked by transgender.

I totally get what you mean, but I think we've hit the point where that will happen.

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lionguard · 23/11/2017 13:07

Sounds great to me

I’m confused by “heterosexual people identifying as lesbians”

What’s that then?

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GuardianLions · 23/11/2017 13:45

Thanks both and I see your point Nyx1
Lion What's going on with the moniker? Grin
In seriousness - basically you get a male and female couple (het), where one of them identifies as the opposite sex (in the case of the harassers, the male identifies as a woman) and then because one of them identifies as the opposite sex (whilst still having the body and sex activity of heterosexuals) they can identify as lesbians - ie - because his cock is female, she is giving her (him) a lesbian bj or whatever. They then get to identify as lesbian/queer/etc, along with all the glitter and rainbows, even though they are basically a straight couple having a heterosexual relationship.

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lionguard · 23/11/2017 13:55

Haha sorry I didn't notice the similarity! I name changed today so I bow to your name longevity :)

That all sounds very complicated!

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TheSmallClangerWhistlesAgain · 23/11/2017 14:20

I know a het couple where the woman identifies as non-binary. Her male partner identifies as "queer", although he's in a rather normal hetero relationship with a woman with short hair.

I have short hair, so my DH must be queer as well.

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lionguard · 23/11/2017 15:58

I presume you can be for instance bi sexual in a heterosexual relationship. If he identifies as queer because his partner has short hair that seems a bit mad - I doubt that's the reason though

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TheSmallClangerWhistlesAgain · 23/11/2017 16:03

I was being facetious. She is female, she just identifies as non-binary and gets ratty if anyone calls her "she". Her non-binariness seems to come down to wearing her hair short, a liking for bow ties and using custom pronouns.

Everyone knows she is a bio woman in a relationship with a hetero man.

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TrollTheRespawnJeremy · 23/11/2017 16:05

I hate this fad of having to have a label for everything.

Dp and I are a bit queer. I won't say how but it is fairly obvious to those who know us.

We don't need to give ourselves a name in order to be who were are. And why would we have to explain the intrinsic nature of 'who we are' to people anyway??

I'm not interested in visibility. I'm not interested in 'having a voice as a minority'.

I just want to live my life quietly on my own terms.

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TheSmallClangerWhistlesAgain · 23/11/2017 16:11

I respect that immensely, Troll.

Some people seemed to have moved away from judging people on the strength of their characters.

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