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A gem from my mum

(9 Posts)
KickAssAngel Sat 11-Nov-17 22:20:53

She was talking about a private boys' school that has great resources and said, "It's a good thing you two were girls really, as I would have felt bad not being able to send you to a school as wonderful as that."

When I gave a spluttered "didn't you feel bad about not sending girls to a wonderful school?" she really didn't get the point.

It was over the phone, so hard to have a proper discussion on it, but arrrghh!

MoreCheerfulMonica Sat 11-Nov-17 22:25:59

Oh yes. It's not long since my mother informed me that, if they'd paid for schooling, they'd have paid for my brother but not for me, as men have careers but women stay at home with the children. Sigh.

Anotherdayanotherdollar Sat 11-Nov-17 22:26:37

Maybe she just meant that it was out of her hands because it was a boys school and not that it was less important for girls to have a good education.

KickAssAngel Sat 11-Nov-17 22:45:38

nope - she def. meant that boys needed the superior education.

The thing is, she insisted that DSis & I went to college because she'd never been given that chance, and her brother was.

I've spent my life battling against feeling that I'm not very clever. I think she deliberately didn't want me to be too successful because of being a girl, and often made disparaging remarks. She's a bit confused by one of my nieces who is a complete super-brain.

Boulshired Sat 11-Nov-17 23:00:04

Sometimes you have to judge by the times and pressure that people live in. My own mother was removed from school to be primary carer for her brothers when her own mother died. It is not surprising her own views on women and the roles was screwed, she had years of conditioning. for her the most important thing a woman could do was find a good man, but the reality for her was that was her only option.

KickAssAngel Sat 11-Nov-17 23:05:08

I know, and she was given a year at secretarial college then had to return home to help as her mum had surprise twins!

But, yes, I am treated the same as my teen child when I go home without DH, but treated as an adult when he's with me. A woman without a man . . .

It's only recently that I realized I'm the only woman in my entire extended family to work full time with a young child. No wonder they all think I'm some kind of alien freak.

KickAssAngel Sat 11-Nov-17 23:05:55

I'm not even upset/angry about this. Just a bit eye-rolly, sigh and move on.

MoreCheerfulMonica Sat 11-Nov-17 23:42:04

Yes, exactly that. One rolls one's eyes, sighs and gets on with life.

NoLoveofMine Sat 11-Nov-17 23:53:24

Out of interest, what was the school? Just wondering in case my brothers attend it..

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