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RAGE - is it just me?

(103 Posts)
Slimthistime Sat 04-Nov-17 00:00:12

Is it just me who has so much rage at the moment? I am not surprised that so many men are a problem but sadly being a lifelong cynic about them isn't helping my rage level.

Poshindevon Sat 04-Nov-17 06:21:03

You dont say why your so full of rage? Whay a sad way to live being angry all the time

QuentinSummers Sat 04-Nov-17 07:10:49

I'm not full of rage exactly but I am finding the whole news stuff at the moment highly stressful. I've had various things happen throughout my life and this is making me think about them more, it's upsetting.
Sexual violence against women is so endemic

DJBaggySmalls Sat 04-Nov-17 10:11:43

Yes it is a sad way to live being angry a lot. What a shame that so many men would rather be vegan than feminist.

Slimthistime Sat 04-Nov-17 10:14:46

Posh, I'm never angry
That's why I'm finding it so hard
Yes Quentin, it's so endemic.

If I could go a live on a woman only commune only right now, I would. Though I have thought that for a long time.

Popchyk Sat 04-Nov-17 10:21:59

I've moved from rage onto a world-weary disgust. I don't recommend it. Rage was better.

I am avoiding most media outlets at the moment in the hope that I can avoid a descent into life-long bitterness.

Slimthistime Sat 04-Nov-17 10:39:29

Pop, oh I thought you were going to say the next stage is easier!

Poshindevon Sat 04-Nov-17 11:56:56

I apologise if I am being thick but what exactly fills you with rage? Sexual harrassment and abuse of women worldwide. The wars that rage around the globe, immigration starving human beings or do you simply hate men?
By the way the definition of rage is a period of violent anger so you are angry.
Instead of seeking a female only community to blot it all out why not find away to contribute to a cause that fulfills you.

Datun Sat 04-Nov-17 11:58:31

I’m angry. I’m bloody furious. And yes, I lay it all at the door of feminism.

Only now, it is tempered by a white hot determination.

Never has the word solidarity resonated with me so much, than it has in the last few weeks.

Women everywhere have managed to set up a twilight bark, which is incredibly powerful.

You know it’s powerful, because of all the men who are trying to shut it down.

But what’s really encouraging is women are calling out that very act for the patriarchal control it is.

So you have people talking about rape and sexual assault that’s one thing. But then they are jumping on the men who are trying to minimise it. That’s another thing.

They are not shutting up.

See this clip from Have I got News for You where with Jo Brand. Listen to the audience‘s reaction.

cliffdramas Sat 04-Nov-17 12:20:41

Jo Brand was brilliant last night on hignfy.

I had a 'hell yes' moment when she responded to Quentin Letts dismissing Julia Hartley-Brewer's account of sexual harassment.

Quentin: "He's brave. Big strong girl. As we say in boxing."
Jo Brand "She's a woman Quentin. She's not a girl." star

And the audiences reaction. The whole first segment was otherwise pretty awful. Quentin, Iain and Paul did not come out of that well. They completely misjudged the mood.

birdsdestiny Sat 04-Nov-17 12:30:19

Thanks for that clip datun. I have been meaning to google it all morning as I didn't see the show but had heard about the reaction. She does a really good job there, measured, calm, articulate, she makes them look very silly. It's interesting watching what used to be very 'right on' comedians morphing into Jim Davidson.

IfyouseeRitaMoreno Sat 04-Nov-17 12:32:28

Go Jo Fucking Brand grin

After this and the overwhelmingly negative reaction to the 14 Male 3 Female Newsnight disaster I’m feeling positive that men are finally realising that they don’t get to define what constitutes sexual harassment of women.

Popchyk Sat 04-Nov-17 12:41:54

They are the establishment now, not the maverick outsiders that they have always pretended to be.

They have a position to protect. And they do that by belittling and trivialising the concerns of anyone other than privileged white men.

Datun Sat 04-Nov-17 12:44:06


Yeah, exactly!

“What constitutes sexual harassment ?”.

We asked 15 men...

nauticant Sat 04-Nov-17 12:49:00

It's hardly surprising people are feeling rage. I feel rage every time I hear someone whine "but it was acceptable 15 years ago!" or "how can a man know how to interact with a woman now?". No matter how many times the sheer idiocy of these comments are addressed, there'll be another columnist from the Spectator, another Tory dinosaur, or another handmaiden come along 5 minutes later and repeat them.

It's also rage inducing to hear people say "you're over-reacting, you need to calm down".

There's a great deal of wilful stupidity being employed to present this as "a big fuss" or a "witch hunt".

QuentinSummers Sat 04-Nov-17 13:14:29

but it was acceptable 15 years ago!
15 years ago was 2002! No it fucking wasn't acceptable in 2002. I doubt it was acceptable in the 70s or the 50s or the Victorian times either. It's just bullshit people say to make themselves feel better about either doing it or being on the receiving end.

FizzyWaterAndElderflower Sat 04-Nov-17 13:29:15

Exactly Quentin - it wasn't acceptable, the men just didn't care what the women who were being subjected to it thought.

It's not like giving money for a wedding present for gods sake, it's not that customs have changed. It's more like it was still rape in practise before 1992 if your husband forced himself on you - just because it wasn't legally rape and nothing was done about it doesn't mean that pre-1992 married women were fine with it!

nauticant Sat 04-Nov-17 13:38:23

Amazing isn't it? The BBC reported Michael Fallon, in explaining his behaviour that led to his resignation, saying this:

He told the BBC that what had been "acceptable 15, 10 years ago is clearly not acceptable now".

The same has been said so many times by others I've lost count.

QuentinSummers Sat 04-Nov-17 13:50:17

Maybe he means acceptable to the party/bosses rather than the women. Which would not be a surprise as a man who does that clearly doesn't have women's feelings at the forefront of his mind.

PovertyPain Sat 04-Nov-17 14:00:27

If the sexual harassment was acceptable 15yrs ago, why did these creeps not do it openly? 😒 I'm absolutely delighted with all this reporting. Did pps really think it didn't happen? I'm delighted as I'm hoping that now that the sexual harassment of women is now being talked about, men and their handmaidens, that are so in support of permitting self identification of sex and permitting men the right to enter female only spaces, might finely understand why intelligent women disagree.

HeyBells Sat 04-Nov-17 14:00:37

As a law student over 25 years ago, I wrote an extended essay about sexual harassment in the workplace and the employment law around it. It wasn't acceptable then and it didn't suddenly become acceptable in between times.

Mooncuplanding Sat 04-Nov-17 14:01:37

I too have morphed from rage to world weary

I knew 15 years ago this type of behaviour was wrong and just because women were silenced doesn't mean there weren't plenty of us calling it out

It's pretty wearing hearing all these accounts of harassment and abuse and the menz reply as if they've just noticed.

I can't even be arsed to listen to them, but what I do hope is that the majority of women will simply refuse to put up with it anymore and they'll simply have to change despite all their whinging

PovertyPain Sat 04-Nov-17 14:07:08

Oh, I meant to add, yes, Jo Brand was fucking awsome, last night. Please watch it. I think the reaction of the audience shows that the tide might be turning. The men came across as creeps and Quentin Letts really came across as particularly odious.

NewspaperTaxis Sat 04-Nov-17 14:13:40

The rage thing has been going on for a while, but the news these days is relentlessly downbeat well depressing really, I mean Trump North Korea Rubbish Conservative Govt Dead Lib Dems Quirky Unelectable Opposition it is just all we are getting and it's a long way from the London Olympics etc however the phony war about the economy is now over and the real war about the debt is just starting.

Outing myself as a bloke for the purpose of this thread, the whole sexual harrassment thing has me in two minds in one respect only. a) I'm glad this is all coming out and am one the one hand astonished it has taken so long, and also not surprised. We are, after all, in anti-whistleblowing terrritory here, where you do the right thing and get subject to alternative fictional narrative of smears. This is now as English as Chaucer and Cheddar Cheese, you saw it with South Yorkshire police and Hillsborough, with Rotherham/Rochdale local council and Sara Rowbottom and Jayne Senior who both got trashed, you even saw it with the RSPCA and the family of some cat they unfairly had bumped off! It is a well-worn, quasi legitimate strategy. So you can see how any woman would a) See no other women being able to raise concerns about this and b) Get warned off by an authority figure quite easily, making insinuations about their career prospects.

But my second concern is odd. Because, ironically, the way whistleblowers then get defamed is curiously similar to the allegations made in secret on a speadsheet currently doing the rounds. Some of those may be true, others may not be, but it is striking that often MPs won't even know what someone has on them and of course can't deny it if they don't know, so they are allowed to stand. It is really quite pernicious, and you can see how some career opportunists could make merry with this.

Not connecting that of course with former chief whip Mr Williamson's Francis Urquart-type ascent to power in the last few days.

MrsTerryPratchett Sat 04-Nov-17 14:35:49

It wasn't acceptable 30 years ago, never mind 5.

What these men mean is that it was acceptable to other repulsive men. Whose opinion is the only one they cared about.

There are people that do terrible things even when they are illegal. Then there are people who do the right thing, even when the wrong thing is sanctioned and legal. 'Because I could get away with it' isn't an apology.

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