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Small and random acts of feminism

(69 Posts)
MulhuddartDrive Tue 24-Oct-17 23:28:37

I sometimes feel so overwhelmed by the challenges facing women that I've decided to trying to do small things to support the cause.

I'm currently building a database of contacts for a client. Wherever possible I'm picking female contacts (all other criteria being equal). I've probably increased the number of female contacts by 10% while maintaining the integrity of the data.

I felt a small victory today when ds (5) referred to a dog in the park as "she". I call all creatures of not immediately obvious sex female so it's rubbing off!

Kleptronic Tue 24-Oct-17 23:33:16

I use person for everyone, regardless of sex or age. Well sometimes I use tiny person.

MulhuddartDrive Tue 24-Oct-17 23:39:44

Oh, I like that. I am also trying very hard to say "folks" or, "everyone" instead of "guys" in a group.

Kleptronic Tue 24-Oct-17 23:49:11

Oo yes, I say 'people', or 'fellows', or 'compadres' or, sparingly because it might start a political debate, 'comrades'. Or denizens, but also sparingly, because it might get blank looks, it not being very commonly heard. Not that I'm not up for a political debate mind, but sometimes it's not the time, or the company for it.

SmellyHead Tue 24-Oct-17 23:52:52

For the last couple of years I have consciously choosing to read books written by women.

SmellyHead Tue 24-Oct-17 23:53:20


DaisyRaine90 Tue 24-Oct-17 23:56:09

This is not feminism. Feminism means equality for the sexes, this is favouritism towards women.

As a mother to 2 DCs, one female and one male, I split things down the middle. I call the elephant “he” then the giraffe “she” or vice Versa.

I believe in equality of the sexes
Trying to put men down and not reading books by men etc, is just as much discrimination as saying women should do all the housework.

This frustrates me so much.

badbadhusky Wed 25-Oct-17 00:00:11

I’m in a Lib/Lab marginal and I’m one of those mythical floating voters (with lefty leanings). I usually vote for the party fielding a female candidate as women are woefully under-represented in parliament.

AssassinatedBeauty Wed 25-Oct-17 00:01:52

What part of what anyone has described is putting men down? How is choosing to read books by women discriminatory?

badbadhusky Wed 25-Oct-17 00:02:35

I should have said that I am particularly fussy in local elections. The LibDems fielded an entirely male team. hmm

Rumandraisin1 Wed 25-Oct-17 00:05:21

Over the course of my life so far I've read so many books by men, watched so many films made by men, and with a male lead character, heard so many male opinions in the media, I'd probably need to spend the rest of my life just seeking out women's views and work in order to try to even things out. Not actively seeking out either male or female films/books/opinions won't lead to a nice even split - That's not how the world works.

DaisyRaine90 Wed 25-Oct-17 00:06:04

It’s reading books only written by women.

DaisyRaine90 Wed 25-Oct-17 00:07:06

I think I’ve read a 50:50 split tbh. But I’d go on the merit of the book not the gender of the writer.

DaisyRaine90 Wed 25-Oct-17 00:08:19

I would also vote on a party based on policies not female seats.

If you were really being feminist by that standard surely you would vote for the Conservatives as they are the one with the female leader?

64BooLane Wed 25-Oct-17 00:14:44

Surely feminism is about dismantling the patriarchy for the benefit of everyone? and that sometimes means making a point of foregrounding women’s voices, stories and experiences.

If you live in a structurally unequal society, you cannot fix it by making a point of never favouring women.

Also, seeking out women’s stories and ensuring they’re included on lists is not “trying to put men down”.

shivermytimbers Wed 25-Oct-17 00:15:55

Feminism means equality for the sexes
I don't necessarily agree with this. I think it has more to do with the liberation from oppression of women. This might create more equality between the sexes but that would be, imo, a biproduct. Given that men continue to benefit from an unjustifiable privilege, I don't see the preservation of their rights as something I need to concern myself with when considering the advancement of women.
In short... reading books by women = a good thing

DaisyRaine90 Wed 25-Oct-17 00:20:08

I am struggling to see this inequality, especially in this country.

We have come so far. Women do the same jobs, mostly for the same pay,

We do better in education.
Most of us get some flexibility as regards having children and careers at the same time (or choice to be SAHMs)

There are still inequalities sure, but nit picking over this stuff just seems petty to me when there is sexual exploitation and FGM going on.

MulhuddartDrive Wed 25-Oct-17 00:27:07

If that's how you feel Daisy, don't let this thread distract you from your fgm, trafficking and other campaigns.

AssassinatedBeauty Wed 25-Oct-17 00:27:56

This thread is about small acts of feminsim, not about what major aspects of inequality are being challenged. Do you think that the people posting here aren't concerned about sexual exploitation and FGM?

You are also ignoring history and looking at it as if we are starting from the same point with no history of inequality and discrimination. Which is wrong. As PP have said, there would have to be many many books by women read to counter the historical imbalance.

BorisTrumpsLair Wed 25-Oct-17 00:28:13

No Daisy you would vote for the party that would do the most to elevate women's status in society. may and the Tories are very clearly not that party.

I don't want to be equal with men. I don't want to see men equally raped, sexually exploited, unpaid and overlooked as women are. I don't want to see 2 men a week killed by an intimate partner. I don't want men to be increasingly judged on the size of their pecs and forced to wear heels to work.

I want to be liberated from living in a society lead by rape culture, free to have an abortion should I want one without the medical procedure being approved by 2 doctors for me. I want my daughters to be free to study whatever the fuck they want and be able to wear flat shoes to work if they chose to because they are judged by their deeds and not their appearance. I want them to be safe from make sexual violence in their lives.

Feminism isn't about being the same as men. It's about being free to live as a woman in the world. Not controlled by men or on men's terms. Equality doesn't mean " the same". Clearly men and women are quite different physically. It's about women having true meaningful equal access to power, wealth, politics, and personal choice. It's about being liberated from living a life through the lens of the male gaze, and from being the "other" in society.

BorisTrumpsLair Wed 25-Oct-17 00:29:44

This thread is about small and random acts of feminism.

SmellyHead Wed 25-Oct-17 00:31:45

It was in response to this]. I’m just reading his share for him smile

BorisTrumpsLair Wed 25-Oct-17 00:33:58

My small acts centre around employing women through the sale of my flat wherever possible.

Interactions with men (lawyers, surveyors, estate agents) have been mostly hideous. So this time I am seeking out women where I can. They may it may not be any better (though thus far they are) but at least interactions with them aren't constantly peppered with sexism and patronising remarks.

I'm also inspired to write an article in why housing is a feminist issue - but not sure I CBA.

shivermytimbers Wed 25-Oct-17 00:34:09
Some interesting (and very detailed) reading about inequality in Britain if you'd like to have a look Daisy

BorisTrumpsLair Wed 25-Oct-17 00:36:13

I carry a black permanent marker pen to deface any "men working overhead" signs I can reach.

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