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So many excuses for male violence

(12 Posts)
CosmicPineapple Thu 19-Oct-17 08:18:42

Why?

Why is it so impossible for society to call it what it is?
Why should excuses be found to explain a man publicly threatening and intimidating a woman?

He was having a bad day.
She would not shut up.
She wound him up.
Maybe she pushed him.
She was sarcastic.

I do not know why I am so upset, we see male violence especislly against women excused daily. Maybe its because there is a video of it and it was so aggressive?
Maybe its because women were also blaming the female victim as well as all the men?

I have avoided watching the video of this man on a train threatening a women because I knew it would be horrendous. I did watch it last night and it made me shake with fear.
I commented that male violence should not be excused and I have been told:
stop judging him
I dont know his story
Shut up
He was only shouting
She caused it
You are one of those feminazi
You are over reacting.

A man can publicly threaten, harass and abuse a woman in public and on video yet still the women is blamed.

Male violence will never stop will it sad

NoLoveofMine Thu 19-Oct-17 09:12:49

I share your frustration CosmicPineapple. Another example was when the CCTV was released of the jogger who pushed a woman he was passing onto the road, into the path of an oncoming bus which only narrowly avoided her by swerving, on Putney Bridge (he's still not been caught either). She was just walking to work when a man chose to do that, yet many commenting were trying to blame her, saying she must have done something, playing the video over and over to freeze one frame to claim she tried to trip him up (complete nonsense) - the desperation to blame a woman and excuse a man for male violence amongst many was quite disturbing. As in your example, something can be on camera yet many will still seek to do all this. Thanks for commenting and challenging it - there will be others reading who are heartened by you doing so!

NightmareMonkey Thu 19-Oct-17 09:22:01

We should remember that domestic abuse is also inflicted on men by female perpetrators

CosmicPineapple Thu 19-Oct-17 09:31:45

How can we forget Night when every thread discusding male violence has the women do it too gang posting hmm

Men commit more violent crime than women.
The large % of DV victims are women.
Men make up the biggest % of DV abusers.

So based on that I would lime to discuss male violence and why it is excused....which by the way "women do it too" is just another excuse.

SweetGrapes Thu 19-Oct-17 09:40:55

It's shit, isn't it?
What does a man need to do to get caught? It's on camera, doesn't matter. He admits it (ala trump)... doesn't matter. It's always a woman's fault. And if all else doesn't work, there will always be a woman somewhere in the world who has done it too - just go scouring the world for her and there you are... all set with the most infallible excuse of them all apparently! hmm angry

ThymeLord Thu 19-Oct-17 09:47:37

Male violence will never stop will it

I wish I didn't agree with this, but I do. I can't see an end to it, particularly when we are not allowed to mention it without being told that it's meeeean to the men who don't do it. It's doing my blood pressure no good to keep seeing NAMALT, or women do it too. How can we fight the problem when we aren't allowed to name the problem?

CosmicPineapple Thu 19-Oct-17 09:54:12

Yes yes the violent jogger!
Must have been the womans fault angry

As long as excuses are found and as long as discussion about male violence is silenced we are unable to fight it.

Why is that though?
I am desperate to understand why it is swept under the carpet.

CosmicPineapple Thu 19-Oct-17 09:54:12

Yes yes the violent jogger!
Must have been the womans fault angry

As long as excuses are found and as long as discussion about male violence is silenced we are unable to fight it.

Why is that though?
I am desperate to understand why it is swept under the carpet.

DJBaggySmalls Thu 19-Oct-17 09:57:49

50% of the population commit 90% of the violent crimes. And thats only the recorded incidents.
If women were as violent as men we'd be kept under curfew or medicated.

CosmicPineapple Thu 19-Oct-17 10:04:02

The excuses keep coming.

Thread in active about angry man on bus.
The intimidated female OP is being told to

Change her bus route
Get an earlier/later train
Sit far away from him
Do not engage
Avoid him
Maybe he ha MH

A few posters have said its not on and she should complain but on the whole his male aggression is being made her problem to deal with!!

Why?

God this is infuriating and scarey.

Elendon Thu 19-Oct-17 10:18:26

DJ When women were committing crime in order to get the vote they were put under curfew and treated as if mentally ill and violently attacked as well for example force feeding.

Elendon Thu 19-Oct-17 10:21:45

And that was over a hundred years ago! Nothing has really changed. The abortion law is a case in point, two doctor's have to sign and it remains a criminal act if the law is not strictly adhered to.

I hate excuses for violence of any kind and what really gets my goat is people declaring pacifism and yet ignoring violence against women.

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