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Resources on feminism and women's work - WAHM/SAHMS

(9 Posts)
bluehairnewhair Tue 17-Oct-17 19:37:04

My eldest was having a go at me claiming I 'haven't worked for 17 years' and that my DH does all the work ie he's the one with the full-time paid job. As I have spent the last 17 years since becoming a parent never stopping working and working till I dropped, some of the work paid, some of it not, some of the paid work outside the home (part-time) and a lot at home, as well as all the unpaid work I do at home, this hurt A LOT.

Can anyone point me in the direction of resources that discuss that working at home, whether paid or unpaid, is still 'work'? And that women's work, whilst more likely to be unpaid or low paid compared to men's and more likely to take place at home, is not therefore less valuable?

Steaming right now. angry

bluehairnewhair Tue 17-Oct-17 19:39:29

I did point out that as only paid work was valued in future she would need to pay me my going rate, £25/hour, to talk to me. And she'd be cooking her own dinners from now on, as I'd be too busy earning money to do any cooking.

bluehairnewhair Tue 17-Oct-17 19:40:56

And yes, my eldest is a DD, who has internalised all that lovely lack of respect for women's work.


newtlover Tue 17-Oct-17 19:43:51

your oldest is 17 I take it?
you could just go on strike
I'm sure someone will suggest some good resources (I seem to recall the UN may have calculated the value of women's work)
however, nothing like a bit of action research

Miffer Tue 17-Oct-17 19:44:33

I had the pleasure of meeting this lady a few years ago.

DJBaggySmalls Tue 17-Oct-17 19:47:04

Have you used the Unpaid Work calculator? Its by the Office for National Statistics so she cant argue with it.

bluehairnewhair Tue 17-Oct-17 19:48:51

Fab! Thank you! She's 17, yes, and doing Politics and Economics A Levels, so a bit of feminist political/economic theory is exactly what she needs to redress the balance!

MyNameIsLucyStone Tue 17-Oct-17 20:02:03

How annoying!

She'll understand if she has DC in the future.

I remember reading a book called something like 'The bitch in the house' in my early 20s and I couldn't understand why all these women were so angry.

(It was basically a series of essays about women's home lives.)

Anyway that'll be no good for your DD.

How about Who Cooked Adam Smith's Dinner?.

QuarksandLeptons Tue 17-Oct-17 22:41:56

Ah that must have been infuriating!

She’ll get a shock if / when she has a baby and is at home off work. I was so shocked at how much harder it was to mind a baby and look after a house than what I had previously thought of as my really demanding job.

If you look at the costs for all of the work a stay at home parent does, it’s absolutely enormous. I calculated this as was weighing up going back to work full time versus working for myself part time.

Ok, so I did some basic maths....

A nanny for full days, 10 hours a day, five days a week costs about £55,000 a year once you’ve factored in holidays, sick pay etc.

If you are at home, you don’t take weekends off so the nanny cost would be closer to £80,000 for 7 days a week.

Nanny’s aren’t employed to do housework, so factor in a cleaner for a few hours a day too, 7 days a week and you’re looking at around £15,000 per year.

Then all of the household management plus cooking you’d need to have a housekeeper for a few hours a day another £15,000 or so.

Add to that, driving children (taxis) so another £4000.

Helping with schoolwork? That would be a tutor, starting at £40 an hour so a minimum of £4000 a year.

So, £118,000 would be a conservative estimate of how much the work you have done each year for 17 years would have cost if you had to outsource/ delegate it to others.

Plus to pay for that you are paying after you’ve paid tax so the cost is much higher.

Not to mention, all of the night duties I’m sure you did when the children were babies. That would have been a night nurse, who cost £2,000 per week.

I hope your daughter is a bit kinder and more reflective. Feminism starts in the home with respecting other women!

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