Birthday cards - don't take too seriously

[whoputthecatout]

Been looking for a birthday card for my DD. Sea of pink in shops naturally. DD is not a fan of pink.

So I googled "cards for daughter that are not pink" - yup, up came a see of images of pink cards.

Now I know I can change the way I google e.g. cards for daughters that are blue. Up came some blue cards, but yup, still couldn't get rid of the pink on a lot of them - pink pictures, writing etc.

As I say, this is meant to be lighthearted, but it does make quite a serious point.

I think card manufacturers are missing a trick here - how about a shelf in stores entitled "Cards for daughters - not pink". I think they would do quite a trade....

[tabulahrasa]

Not to detract from your point, but that isn't how search engines work not pink will throw up the same results as pink, you've put pink in so it will search for pink...

[whoputthecatout]

Usually if you want to eliminate something from a search putting 'not' in will do that.....

It usually works, but obviously not this time.

Perhaps someone more techy than me can tell what I should put in.

[peglady]

Search for -pink daughter birthday card. The - sign before a word means not. But a lot of cards won’t be listed by colour anyway.
Why don’t you just choose a photographic or art style card instead and write something really personal inside?

[whoputthecatout]

I am more of a conspiracy theorist myself - clearly all women must love pink and all other options should be excluded

[FaFoutis]

-pink

[wrappedupinmyselflikeaspool]

I think this is a fairly serious problem actually. Not trivial at all. It's another way in which the quality and usefulness of things meant for women to buy is limited and a good example of the way consumer goods are unnecessarily gendered. I hate pink anything, not because I hate the colour, it's quite a nice colour, but I hate that I can't have a birthday or Mother's Day card that's not screaming FEMININITY, FLOWERS, PINK, PRETTY it's so patronising. To be fair birthday cards for men are even worse. Boring and weird. Golf, fishing and beer.
Of course it's possible to buy a jokey card that's not pink or about fishing but then they are often about getting horribly drunk and oh how hilarious as if we are all either teenagers or alcoholics.
I honestly don't know how card shops stay in business.

[thatstoast]

My brother often comments how he gets lots of cards with boats on. Why are boats considered masculine in this context?

The overall colour scheme is very overt though. You don't really need to read the signs in a card shop, just look for pink for women, blue for men and red for Christmas.

[whoputthecatout]

Why don’t you just choose a photographic or art style card instead and write something really personal inside? Yes, peglady, that's what I normally do. I was just browsing a shelf in a well known store and couldn't see a single non-pink card. So I tried google out of curiosity. It gave me a laugh in rather sad way.

Thanks for the -pink tip anyway and to FaFoutis too.

Am off to see what it turns up

[whoputthecatout]

Guess what the correct search message turned up? Yup, quite a lot of pink.......

[tabulahrasa]

"I am more of a conspiracy theorist myself - clearly all women must love pink and all other options should be excluded"

In fairness I think you're right and there's just tons of pink cards... just that yeah you want - instead of not in searches.

[LassWiTheDelicateAir]

It's another way in which the quality and usefulness of things meant for women to buy is limited and a good example of the way consumer goods are unnecessarily gendered

Sorry but that is just tosh.

You have 2 options. You can buy the nasty tat , naff "dearest relative" cards from Hallmark or can you go to any branch of Waterstones, any gallery or musuem shop, any one of the 1000s of independent gift shops and buy a card that the recipient might actually like because it is relevant to them.

It really isn't a problem.

[SylviaPoe]

Try Card Factory. You can get ten birthday cards for a pound. I've just looked through the twenty I have and only four have pink in them. The other sixteen aren't gendered one way or the other. You can pick whichever ones you want in store.

[ILoveDolly]

Go on Etsy. There are any amount of funky cards there

[DJBaggySmalls]

If you are looking at a wall of pink glittery cards all aimed at girls then of course it isnt tosh.

[LassWiTheDelicateAir]

DJBaggySmalls

If you are looking at a wall of pink glittery cards all aimed at girls then of course it isnt tosh

You would have to be pretty determined to limit your shopping possibilities to be faced with that.

Sorry but I can't stand this ridiculous over- egging of oh isn't it awful, everything is so sexist. Goodness knows where you shop for cards if that is all you can find.

[QuentinSummers]

If you have approx 2 mins to buy a card then most likely you will do it in the supermarket. Where you are pretty muchforced into pink, espesh for a younger girl. I'm with you OP. It's infuriating. Yes you can get other cards, it's just a lot more effort

[wrappedupinmyselflikeaspool]

Lass, I'm glad you find this so easy to dismiss. Life must be very easy for you. Of course people can look for other products. Of course they exist, but it' not 'tosh' to say this is another limiting, gendered thing to deal with on a daily basis.

Perhaps you, like one of my sisters, thinks a bit of pink helps you 'get in touch with your femininity' and isn't at all sexist, but if being a woman just means pink stuff to you then I really pity you.

[LassWiTheDelicateAir]

Perhaps you, like one of my sisters, thinks a bit of pink helps you 'get in touch with your femininity' and isn't at all sexist, but if being a woman just means pink stuff to you then I really pity you

Nice bit of fantasy writing there. Or do you just have difficulty interpreting what I wrote given your interpretation bears no resemblance to It?

There are gazillions of outlets which sell all sorts of cards.

However if you want to tie yourself to looking for a card "for a girl" or "for a man" or for "a whatever" as opposed to a non generic card that the recipient might like and might actually mean something to them - then go ahead. But don't then whine about there being no choice of cards which is patently untrue.

[ThisisrealityGreg]

At least there are plenty of other choices out there. Don't even get me started on trying to find birthday cards with pictures/drawings of black people on them!!

[LassWiTheDelicateAir]

Where you are pretty muchforced into pink, espesh for a younger girl

Serious question but what does the recipient being a girl have to do with anything or play any part in which card you select?

I don't buy cards for children (or people for that matter) based on whether the recipient is xx or xy. I buy a card that has a relevance to the person getting it.

One little girl used to get anything with Thomas the Tank as she loved Thomas- my brother gets horses as does my sister-in-law, my husband gets cats and flowers.

[thedancingbear]

wrappedupinmyselflikeaspool , why the personal attacks? Do you speak to everyone you disagree with like that, or is it just on the internet?

Of course, the real culprits here aren't the card companies, but all the sexist dads and granddads who go out any buy these gendered articles.

[deydododatdodontdeydo]

Of course, the real culprits here aren't the card companies, but all the sexist dads and granddads who go out any buy these gendered articles.

Is that sarcasm? Sorry, I'm genuinely

[LassWiTheDelicateAir]

why the personal attacks?

Try re- reading your patronising little comment about pitying me. If you want to write in that manner, particularly when you make stuff up, then expect to get the reply you did.

[LassWiTheDelicateAir]

Sorry dancingbear I misread your post.

Greetings card companies make naff, gendered and status cards and people buy them.

They also make huge numbers of funny or beautiful or interesting or unusual cards non gendered and non status
and people buy them. It's your choice.

But if you start with the mindset you are "buying a card for a girl.." you are buying into the idea of gendered cards.

"Buying a card for a child who loves trains/cats/horses/" is completely different.

[QuentinSummers]

If you don't know the child well and just want to buy a card for a 6 year old it gets more difficult. Most of my card buying is for my children's classmates parties, I can't buy a personalised card and the age ones (5/6/7 whatever) are heavily gendered.
It's the same as clothes. You can buy non gendered but it's much more effort than buying gendered. And it's just perpetuating the stereotype if you are lazy like me