Talk

Advanced search

Brilliant video reponse to the horrible "lesbians need to learn to love dick" argument

(117 Posts)
ArcheryAnnie Wed 08-Feb-17 15:47:13

youtu.be/eOqbwWymcTo

Just saw this video by Magdalen Berns on twitter, answering all the bollocks about lesbians needing to learn to want to date transwomen, and if they don't get over their aversion to dick then they are totally just like racists. (Spoiler alert: Magdalen Berns doesn't think so.) It really cheered me up, not just with the excellent arguments, but with the deadpan attitude.

With thanks and a hat-tip to Miranda Yardley for linking to it!

TheThinWhiteDutchess Wed 08-Feb-17 20:30:12

Thanks for posting this, very interesting and eye opening!

Also hi as I haven't posted here before.

What I found interesting was what she said about dating being a discriminatory process, and that you are allowed to reject someone as a sexual partner if you want to (paraphrasing!) I've never really thought about it in that way. But I wonder if the fact that women are waking up to this and are more aware of this is threatening the subtle status quo where some men aren't expecting to be rejected?

Poppyred85 Wed 08-Feb-17 21:04:48

Of course sexual preference is discriminatory (in the sense of Deciding between variables). We all have preferences as to what height/ethnicity/accent/personality traits we find attractive. The nature of sexuality is a discussion I've had with friends (both straight and gay) and some feel (and argue) that everyone has the potential to be straight or gay depending on the person they meet, including one friend who is a lesbian saying all women are lesbians but the straight ones haven't met the right woman yet. That would make the reverse of that true too though (all lesbians are straight, they just haven't met the right man yet) and I really don't think it is. I am sure there are some people who believe themselves to have one sexual orientation but the have experiences or meet someone that changes that. I'm not explaining this well and seem to be contradicting myself!

MiddleGround Thu 09-Feb-17 00:09:11

Absolutely fantastic - thank you for sharing!

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett Thu 09-Feb-17 20:08:33

She is amazing! Thanks for sharing this - needed a proper breath of fresh air today flowers

Boofeckinghoo Thu 09-Feb-17 20:42:39

Was that Transwoman mansplaining about who we as viewers should be attracted to? Really?

shins Thu 09-Feb-17 21:15:36

She's brilliant.

Datun Thu 09-Feb-17 23:55:51

Boo

Yup. That trans woman was saying that even though he was born male the fact that he identifies as a woman should mean that lesbians need to consider him as a sexual partner, otherwise they are being discriminatory and trans-phobic.

The reason he targets the lesbian community is because he wants to sleep with women. Straight women won't sleep with him, and he doesn't want to sleep with gay or straight men. His dating pool has shrunk and he's trying every linguistic trick in the book to solve that.

Lesbians are tired of this. Men have been telling them this for years.

PerspicaciaTick Fri 10-Feb-17 00:02:01

The only way for sex not to be discriminatory is if everyone is perpetually willing to have sex with anyone and everyone they meet. This would avoid anyone feeling rejected.

Although I can't fathom what is wrong with a little rejection once in a while, it builds resilience.

Boofeckinghoo Fri 10-Feb-17 12:45:14

that lesbians need to consider him as a sexual partner, otherwise they are being discriminatory and trans-phobic.

But that makes no sense. Lesbians like ladies with vaginas don't they?

As you can tell, I am new to all this but that persons argument has zero logic.

HecateAntaia Fri 10-Feb-17 12:50:43

my fanny, my rules.

nobody has the right to demand access to your genitals.

cadnowyllt Fri 10-Feb-17 13:15:47

Hec et al

But for a very small minority, I think you're pushing at an open door.

Datun Fri 10-Feb-17 13:21:57

Boo

There is nothing logical about the trans-ideology.

Yes, lesbians like fannys. And gay men like willies. And bisexual people don't mind which. You'd think that was fairly simple.

Transwomen (and it usually is people born male identifying as female, not the other way around), maintain that, due to a feeling in their head, they are, to all intents and purposes, women. And that their outward appearance belies their inner 'essence'. So they are women and therefore their genitalia is female. Hence 'lady stick'.

The disconnect between the fact that a penis is the epitome of what is to be male, but that calling it female makes it different, seems to be lost on them.

Hence, a woman who is only attracted to women needs to think seriously about her sexual preference, because a man says he is a woman and thus it makes it so. (Despite the presence of a penis and a staggering amount of male entitlement).

Google 'cotton ceiling'.

Datun Fri 10-Feb-17 13:30:04

By transwomen's logic, if they are all women, and all lesbians, they should all be able date each other and leave normal lesbians alone.

But no. Funny that.

Boofeckinghoo Fri 10-Feb-17 13:33:42

Wow, not sure what to think about all that! I don't think I could deny biology though in a sexual encounter and as for 'cotton ceiling' that sounds positively menacing. No wonder Magdalen is mad. It's not exactly respecting other people's choices, is it?

Anyone can reject anyone if they are not attracted to them! I really dislike the tone of that Transperson in Magdalen's video. As if we don't understand our own sexuality/mind. Fucking hell!

Boofeckinghoo Fri 10-Feb-17 13:38:05

By transwomen's logic, if they are all women, and all lesbians, they should all be able date each other and leave normal lesbians alone

Well yes, that really is it.

CuppaTeaAndAJammieDodger Fri 10-Feb-17 13:45:48

She absolutely wipes the floor with him/her/them (have no idea what pronoun they want to be referred to with).

Yes, indeed very interesting the comment regarding sexual preference being inherently discriminatory ... evolution dictates that it is, to a great extent. Who you have sex with is a decision that absolutely nobody other than the individual (and their intended partner of course) has any say in whatsoever.

TheresABluebirdOnMyShoulder Fri 10-Feb-17 13:49:58

She basically hit the nail on the head at the start of the video by making the point that selecting a sexual partner is by its very nature a discriminatory process and that anybody can reject another person as a sexual partner for any reason. There's really nothing more to say.

If this wasn't the case, then as a PP said upthread, we would all be required to be willing to sleep with everyone on the planet. Are we really all expected to fancy everyone in the world? Or are we allowed to reject some people because we are not attracted to their facial features, or their figure, or their personality, their values, or (gasp) their genitals? Or in fact, for any fucking reason we like.

What does Riley think are the implications for consent with the trans agenda here? Should people be taking part in sexual encounters with trans people when they don't want to just so nobody's feelings are hurt? If I, as a straight woman, reject a heterosexual male because I just don't fancy him, but he believes that I am discriminating against his looks, should I be coerced into sleeping with him anyway?

VestalVirgin Fri 10-Feb-17 14:03:48

If this wasn't the case, then as a PP said upthread, we would all be required to be willing to sleep with everyone on the planet. Are we really all expected to fancy everyone in the world?

Yes, yes we are, if by "we" you mean actual women.

The transwacktivists are no different from traditional patriarchy, it is just that they would prefer to look like the victim - they don't want to have to violently rape lesbians; that would make them look bad; they want the lesbians to essentially rape themselves by "consenting" to being fucked with a dick, due to the social pressure.

Letting ourselves be raped is not enough, now, we now have to pretend that we enjoy it. I believe that trend started in porn and prostitution and has now reached the mainstream.

venusinscorpio Fri 10-Feb-17 15:19:40

Yes Riley does think that. Because Riley is a man who doesn't really see women as real people. The transagenda is far more important than a woman's right to decide her own boundaries. As with so much of this shit.

Datun Fri 10-Feb-17 15:56:18

Bluebird

Are we really all expected to fancy everyone in the world? Or are we allowed to reject some people because we are not attracted to their facial features, or their figure, or their personality, their values, or (gasp) their genitals? Or in fact, for any fucking reason we like

It gets even more linguistically farcical though. The nuances are worth noting. Transactivists will (reluctantly) agree that no one should be coerced into sleeping with someone they don't want to. So far so good.

But they then say you shouldn't exclude a potential partner on the basis that they are trans - because 'transphobia'. Determinedly separating the fact that a transwoman having a penis is not the same thing as being 'trans'.

You can try following the logic and say okay forget trans, I exclude you on the basis of your penis in that case. But then you get all the bollocks about being shallow and only attracted to genitals and not understanding that when those genitals are attached to a female gender it makes them female. You are being cissexist, and you should check your privilege and, you know, just try.

Then you get the more aggressive ones who just say if you don't fuck me you're a bigot.

This is only transwomen. Transmen don't get into these conversations because they are mostly gay women and aren't the slightest bit interested in getting men to fuck them because, you know, they're GAY.

venusinscorpio Fri 10-Feb-17 16:10:26

That in my experience is the argument trans allies make, that anyone of course has a perfect right to say no to sex with any individual but if you exclude trans women as a lesbian then it's "problematic" because you don't really see them as women. No shit Sherlock.

Datun Fri 10-Feb-17 16:37:13

venus

Out of interest I googled the question of transwomen dating other transwomen. I ended up spending a mind blowing half hour on Reddit concluding that if I just screen shot half a dozen comments, printed them and posted them through the door of the house of commons, the trans-gender equality bill would die in its tracks.

Unfortunate, I suspect I'm completely wrong about that.

venusinscorpio Fri 10-Feb-17 16:42:02

Ooh which Reddit thread?

Datun Fri 10-Feb-17 16:54:15

venus

"If a person is totally unidentifiable as trans, and you find him or her attractive and interesting, then you find out her or she is trans and walk away, them you are not reacting to your preference but their irrelevant status, which is by definition bigoted."

www.reddit.com/r/actuallesbians/comments/15ha8u/on_dating_trans_women_and_transphobia/?utm_source=amp&utm_medium=comment_list

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now