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Men are suffering this Christmas!

(80 Posts)
quencher Mon 14-Nov-16 16:09:23

That's what three of this years biggest Christmas adverts say. Let's all grab a tissue and pity their suffering. Poor men, right?
marks and spencer, John Lewis and Sainsbury's are full of pity the men.

It was the Sainsbury's add that made it click for me. Year of the male pity. Great dads or men doing extra-ordinary jobs to make life better this Christmas.

JL
Dad surfers outside in the cold making the trampoline while the woman sits inside on the couch.

M&S
Father Christmas goes out on Christmas Eve to deliver presents. Mrs. Claus asked him to be careful. You can see the wind blowing to indicate it's dangerous out there.
He comes back home, mrs. C is all cosy with a cup of hot beverage pretending about her activities.
She also has better equipment for delivering presents compared to her husbands, a sledge with no roof or heating.
The dad is suffering and can't manage to control his kids.
The little boy is mean to his sister, he manages to get her a present and we are meant to feel sorry for little boys being boys.

Sainsbury's
The dad has a difficult job and can't cope with being there for everybody. No time for buying presents and spending time with his extended family.
He really, really tries very hard.
Everywhere you look, men, men, men! Hard at work.
One of the people that ruin his day is the old woman in the cue.
The only time you see his wife is in the house. That actually says a lot.

So what's going on here? Are they competing on who can be the best man this Christmas?
Is what they do at Christmas better and we should appreciate them more while what women do is just ordinary and mundane. They all seem to be a lover the place and if not then they are suffering in some way shape or form.

ChocChocPorridge Mon 14-Nov-16 16:32:45

I'm abroad, so haven't seen much, and agree it's a crap message - but I'm going to guess that it's marketing. At risk of stereo typing, the women in my family tend to have things sorted in advance - no point marketing as much to them, they're already taking responsibility.

The blokes, they are the ones that are easy to encourage to spend - to do the Christmas Eve run to Boots in desperation. I reckon it's marketing to those men - trying to get them to overspend.

Scarydinosaurs Mon 14-Nov-16 16:35:54

At least the narrative has shifted from women working to do it all, and the men being depicted as incompetent bafoons.

Next year maybe they'lol strike the balance right, and show two couples both working to have a lovely holiday with their family.

MilkTwoSugarsThanks Mon 14-Nov-16 16:37:08

Dear bloody god..... if they feature men they're ripped apart because how dare anyone suggest that men take an active role in and get stressed at Christmas when they don't, and if they feature women they're ripped apart for perpetuating sexism and stereotypes!

Make your fucking minds up!

FeckinCrutches Mon 14-Nov-16 16:38:32

Everyone moaned last year it showed all the women running around looking after everyone. Maybe next year will be different!

quencher Mon 14-Nov-16 17:24:16

It features men playing male roles. Nothing new there. Men being terrible outside of being providers. One of them comes home and the child is already asleep. The other let's his wife put the little girl to sleep. It would be more interesting if a man was pulling the turkey out of the oven. Standing around confused because the sitting wasn't enough, both parents could have helped each other build while the trampoline and and so on.
They have not painted the men in good light.

Make your fucking minds up! It's not about making our fucking minds up. It's about sending the right message. The things we watch, see and read send subliminal messages that socialise us as people whether we want to or not.
If we want sexism to end, we have to make an effort to try and point it out. Using more men this year does not make a difference if it's sending out similar messages regarding gender roles. This is what dads do and this is what mums do at Christmas. It's a copout, it's easy to market things like that and not challenge the norm. Am assuming sexism sells. We all know our places in society. We relate to them but it does not mean it's right.

The blokes, they are the ones that are easy to encourage to spend - to do the Christmas Eve run to Boots in desperation. I reckon it's marketing to those men - trying to get them to overspend I got that too. However, the messages surrounding it makes it more disturbing watch.

Thank goodness it wasn't the woman twerking but his boss.

quencher Mon 14-Nov-16 17:34:02

Actually, most of them are not even subliminal. It's in your face gender role divide.

tribpot Mon 14-Nov-16 17:39:16

I still haven't recovered from the year of Asda Mum, who nearly killed herself getting everything ready for a month, only to be given a pouffe to sit on as no more chairs available when she finally got to sit down to Christmas dinner.

I suspect this year's adverts are a cack-handed attempt by the advertising industry to respond to the backlash their Christmas adverts often generate. Another own goal, then.

Pizanfan Mon 14-Nov-16 21:54:14

I'll be honest, I havn't seen the ads.

Does anyone have links so I could check them out please?

Thanks

Xenophile Mon 14-Nov-16 21:57:20

Google is your friend.

YonicProbe Tue 15-Nov-16 06:58:17

You resisted LMGTFY, Xeno!

if Boots do a male-focussed ad instead of that "here come the girls" drivel, there will indeed be a new era!

Xenophile Tue 15-Nov-16 06:59:30

I am being a paragon of patience and virtue, Yonic.

<adjusts halo>

YetAnotherSpartacus Tue 15-Nov-16 09:02:21

I just wanted Mog back sad Soooo pissed off that I missed the soft toy last year.

MilkTwoSugarsThanks Tue 15-Nov-16 09:17:16

<looks smugly at Mog on the end of the bed>

<contemplates thumbing nose childishly at YetAnother>

😉

YetAnotherSpartacus Tue 15-Nov-16 09:33:20

Waaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!! NOT FAIR!!! sad

MilkTwoSugarsThanks Tue 15-Nov-16 09:50:07

Sorry sad

YetAnotherSpartacus Tue 15-Nov-16 09:52:46

I might just have to re-watch last year's ad to cheer myself up smile

I'm soooooooo jealous.

libprog Tue 15-Nov-16 09:55:00

What was wrong with the M&S one? I thought it was really cool, the woman has to solve everything as usual. I see the point that the boy was mean but still got rewarded by having a present for his sister. But I think the rest was good. It's not like you can change the fact it is "father" xmas...

MilkTwoSugarsThanks Tue 15-Nov-16 09:55:10

<wonders if now is a good time to admit to having two Mogs>

<legs it>

YetAnotherSpartacus Tue 15-Nov-16 10:18:23

That's just greedy! Think of all us poor children who missed out!

I do love that scene in last year's commercial where poor Mog Goes to lick her wounds and nearly gets a chestnut up the bum!

LuluLovesFruitcakes Tue 15-Nov-16 18:11:42

I don't like the message behind this years ones either...my idea of a good Christmas ad would be where the man ISN'T a demi-God of DIY, but is far better flexing his cooking muscles with the Turkey, while his wife hammers the hooks up to hang the fairy lights, before they both get tangled in a total mess of sticky tape and wrapping paper and get really stressed out together wink

Or maybe Dad can go into Boots and totally nail buying his daughter some perfume and/or make-up without the help of the female assistant grin

quencher Tue 15-Nov-16 19:35:44

I knew someone like lulu was out there somewhere. I agree with everything you've said. It's not hard to imagine scenes that are different to the usual.

LuluLovesFruitcakes Tue 15-Nov-16 19:41:46

quencher I completely agree. I was thinking about this thread while I was in the bath and thought - maybe one year John Lewis should shatter the stereotypical gender thing entirely and get the Dad to go out and buy make-up, Mum to go and buy a skateboard...and on Christmas morning the son is super happy to receive a make-up pallette and the daughter is thrilled with her new skateboard wink
But I think that'd break the internet grin

EsmesBees Tue 15-Nov-16 19:43:56

I agree about the Sainsburys one. I don't see why we are supposed to be feeling sorry for the main character when all he seems to have going on is a busy job, unreliable commute and some presents to buy. Most people juggle far more than that and yet manage to spend time with their kids.

nooka Wed 16-Nov-16 06:54:55

The Sainsburys one was just painful. Long and boring. I like James Cordon but he's not so great singing on his own!

Message wise a bit problematic coming from Sainsbury's too, given it's open every day except for Christmas Day so it's employees don't get to give their time to their families too much (like most of retail).

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