I think everyday sexism is getting worse

(60 Posts)
StealthPolarBear Fri 09-Sep-16 16:55:21

And particularly on mn of all places. I don't want to do links as I do mention it on the thread but am I right or am I just spotting it more /getting more sensitive?

MorrisZapp Fri 09-Sep-16 16:57:24

Loads of it on here. Any thread involving a sister in law or a woman within ten feet of a man who is married to someone else.

I wouldn't say it's getting worse though. It's always been like this.

StealthPolarBear Fri 09-Sep-16 16:58:19

I always thouh of mn as being less likely to be everyday sexist than most places.

StealthPolarBear Fri 09-Sep-16 16:58:41

But then as a mere woman what do I know ;)

imwithspud Fri 09-Sep-16 17:01:32

I see it all the time, it's really bad on Facebook (where these types seem to congregate it seems). As is victim blaming.

The other day I over heard someone say that these days sexism is worse for boys than it is for girls these daysconfused

WhisperingLoudly Fri 09-Sep-16 17:02:12

Yep I find it pretty bad.

I think there has been a subtle shift in general attitude on MN in the last couple of years but I'm also more inclined to pick up (and challenge) things that I'd have previously put up with

Truckingalong Fri 09-Sep-16 17:03:04

It's everywhere when you open your eyes and ears to it. It's rife. I have friends, intelligent friends capable of critical thinking, who are the most sexist people I know. They don't think this and when I challenge them on something, they either don't care, are indifferent or are oblivious.

StealthPolarBear Fri 09-Sep-16 17:06:12

Yes that's how I feel whispering.

imwithspud Fri 09-Sep-16 17:07:02

Gosh, my proof reading is terrible today.blush

StealthPolarBear Fri 09-Sep-16 17:08:10

It's ok ill go and wine about you on the pedant thread grin
as soon as I can correct my own mistakes om this post

imwithspud Fri 09-Sep-16 17:09:45

grin I'll keep an eye out for that thread then.

StealthPolarBear Fri 09-Sep-16 17:12:33

Argh I feel like a grumpy old woman.
maybe I should just strap on my marigolds and clean or cook something

StealthPolarBear Fri 09-Sep-16 17:29:19

Ok tea cooked now what?
I'm bored

StealthPolarBear Fri 09-Sep-16 18:04:52

Bump

JacquettaWoodville Fri 09-Sep-16 18:25:10

Hiding AIBU can help but there's some corkers in relationships at times.

I can get dejected and hide threads for a bit!

MatildaOfTuscany Sun 11-Sep-16 13:26:09

No, you're not imagining, sadly. Some awful stuff on here these days. To take just two recent examples: thread on Keith Vaz, gets turned round to "was his wife complicit?" with some posts coming pretty damned close to implying she played a role because (quite possibly - i.e. entirely unsubstantiated speculation plucked out of thin air) she wasn't putting out enough; recent thread in relationships with several posts saying "It just baffles me why women put up with this shit..." - err, she has 3 kids, one really quite tiny, part time job, he's the big earner, and she's had years of being ground down, and he's a "good guy" abuser, i.e. the sort where the rest of society piles in and says "but he seems so nice, you could do so much worse for yourself, shut up and put up..."

ARGGGGHHH.

And breathe.

OlennasWimple Sun 11-Sep-16 13:32:23

I think it's like seeing pregnant women when you're TTC: once you have a reason to notice, you see them everywhere!

I don't know if it's got worse, perhaps the examples are more egregious. I used to love a MIL thread, though (remind me how lucky I am with mine, perhaps), but now the casual sexism and misogyny can be pretty depressing

BeyondASpecialSnowflake Sun 11-Sep-16 15:45:46

I agree. There was thread recently in relationships from a man who admitted to raping his wife, and the sycophantic "coercive sex isn't rape in relationships, ffs! " responses (along with hq deleting the thread when he asked them to) have disillustioned me somewhat.

BeyondASpecialSnowflake Sun 11-Sep-16 15:46:48

That is, I agree that mn is worse.

I did read the op as "everyday feminism" though and wondered wtf they had done now grin

OlennasWimple Sun 11-Sep-16 15:48:46

Beyond - I see that as more than casual sexism, though. I think that's an example of misogyny, and bloody depressing too (see also the thread about someone reflecting back on a sexual encounter when she was younger and whether it was assault or not because he initiated PIV sex without using a condom or seeking her consent to do so)

Soubriquet Sun 11-Sep-16 15:49:44

I've been seeing it a lot lately

Especially women excusing men's bad behaviour when it comes to certain situations

Lweji Sun 11-Sep-16 15:50:11

There was thread recently in relationships from a man who admitted to raping his wife, and the sycophantic "coercive sex isn't rape in relationships, ffs! " responses

WTAF?

Glad I missed that one.

andintothefire Sun 11-Sep-16 15:58:53

I also feel as though it is getting worse. I sometimes wonder if there is a general feeling that women have made as much progress as we are allowed to make, and we should now stop complaining about "trivial" matters. There also now seems to be an increasing backlash from men and women who feel threatened by any measure of feminism or female success.

It scares me to be honest - I am not sure what has happened to make it seem as though things are getting worse again instead of gradually better.

BeyondASpecialSnowflake Sun 11-Sep-16 15:59:54

Yes Olenna, good point. I meant I agree mn is getting worse, that was just a rather extreme example of it. I was more upset by mnhq's response to it than the posters - I could view them as a lot of one offs!

Bitofacow Sun 11-Sep-16 16:51:14

I work with young people and I despair at times. A boy goes out with girl A while in a relationship with girl B. Girl A is vilified even if she didn't know of the relationship.
The other girls will fall on girl A and destroy her. The boys watch bewildered and slightly smug cos they are getting away with it.
A lot of the issues are related to self esteem and we work to build it up but bloody hell those girls can be scary.

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