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Why cat-calling isn't just harmless banter

(6 Posts)
AskBasil Sat 20-Aug-16 09:22:32

I saw a post on FB this morning but I'm not good at linking so if you want to look at it, it's by someone called Taylor McTague who posted this:

^^We live in a sick sick world!!

I went for a walk around midnight, just to clear my head, and I saw a guy in the distance who said "Hey, nice legs!"

I turned around to walk home, and he started following me, shouting "Hey! I said something to you!" and "I gave you a compliment!"

He caught up to me, pushed me up against a telephone pole, pulled out a Swiss Army Knife, said "Didn't your mom teach you to thank someone when they compliment you?", stuck the knife in my leg, said "I guess your legs aren't so great now", and ran off.

I was just attacked and stabbed for not accepting a stranger's compliment, and people still say feminism is a joke. Society needs to wake the fuck up, because I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. You never know until it happens to you.^^

When people say "it's just a bit of fun" or "just a minor nuisance", they fail to take into account that none of us know if the men indulging in this low-level terrorisation, are the sort who will attack us in the way Taylor was attacked if we don't respond in the way they require. It's a demonstration of power and control, it's not supposed to be a compliment, it's a way of reminding us that we aren't safe on our streets and normal men know this, which is why they don't do it and if they're decent, don't minimise or defend it.

When you defend it, you are ignoring this very important dynamic and giving support and succour to those men who enjoy terrorising women.

Please FFS stop it.

AskBasil Sat 20-Aug-16 09:22:54

Sorry about the italics not working.

Xenophile Sat 20-Aug-16 11:26:58

Part of the problem though Basil, is that the type of person who thinks that cat-calling isn't a problem will excuse this example of male violence as an outlier.

It's not really, it's just an incident on the spectrum of male violence, but you know how people need to make excuses for men

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky Sat 20-Aug-16 18:19:43

There will no doubt be people blaming her for daring to go for a walk at midnight.

JacquettaWoodville Sat 20-Aug-16 19:37:01

Ugh, that poor woman.

ageingrunner Fri 02-Sep-16 14:01:36

www.theguardian.com/science/brain-flapping/2016/aug/30/how-to-actually-talk-to-a-woman-wearing-headphones?CMP=share_btn_wa

This article from the guardian seems relevant, about the sense of entitlement to women's attention sons men have

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