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Powerful letter from a rape survivor to her attacker

(65 Posts)
NotMyRealName2015 Sat 04-Jun-16 13:35:45

Couldn't se another thread about this, apologies if it's duplicated, but I had to share this amazing statement written by a woman to read to her rapist in court.

Serious trigger warning- link contains upsetting content.

I thought her statement was incredibly articuate and explains the effects of rape and rape culture so well. I can only imagine how angry she must feel, (my blood was boiling reading the attacker's defence statements-"culture of drinking and sexual promiscuity" ffs) so the fact that she was able to address him so eloquently is bloody incredible.

The last 3 paragraphs had me in tears as well. To that lady, wherever you are, thank you. You are amazing and we are all with you tooflowers

This was astounding. Thanks for sharing it.

I think I went through every major emotion, and several of the minor ones, reading it.

But mainly rage.

NotMyRealName2015 Sat 04-Jun-16 21:05:17

I know what you mean about mixture of emotions. I read it with a mixture of sadness and fury, but with a little bit of hope towards the end.

Hopefully her statement will be widely shared, and it may help at least a few more people to actually 'Get It'.

PlectrumElectrum Sat 04-Jun-16 22:22:57

Thank you for posting. Unbelievably powerful. I feel such rage on her behalf - with the judge, the probation officer, his attorney, every single person who failed to say to that pathetic bastard what she had to. I'd like to think that they all felt the warmth of their own shame in minimising what he did. I'm not overly confident though.

PenguinVox Sat 04-Jun-16 22:29:02

Thanks so much for posting it. Had me in tears as well. Actually I haven't even been able to finish reading it yet.

Bolingbroke Sat 04-Jun-16 22:57:18

I definitely wasn't expecting that. Incredibly powerful and moving.

SisterMoonshine Sat 04-Jun-16 23:01:22

Wow. Amazing piece of straight talking.

AHellOfABird Sat 04-Jun-16 23:01:47

An amazing piece of writing. Well done her.

thefamilyvonstrop Sat 04-Jun-16 23:07:00

Incredible and devastating to read.

0phelia Sun 05-Jun-16 12:11:13

He is a fucking monster.

BeyondTellsEveryoneRealFacts Sun 05-Jun-16 13:02:18

Brilliant piece of writing, and one i identify with all too well

0phelia Sun 05-Jun-16 15:44:49

Sorry to hear that Beyond flowers

MrsSpecter Sun 05-Jun-16 15:48:29

Thanks for sharing OP. I read this earlier and was in tears of both heartbreak and anger. And yes, he is fucking scum. Vile vile VILE! Ugh. And 6 months?? angry

Sparkyduchess Sun 05-Jun-16 17:43:29

I read that last night and cried. The authors outrage, sadness, bewilderment and sense of disillusion was a powerful mix.

Mandatorymongoose Sun 05-Jun-16 17:56:00

I just came here to post that, glad someone has shared it already. It made me cry.

I feel like it's an issue that resonates in the UK too. Our sentencing for sex related crimes often feels poor to me.

I saw this petition regarding complaining about the judge but I'm not sure if it's only for people within the state?

Asprilla11 Sun 05-Jun-16 18:23:26

As a man I am disgusted by people like this, no wonder women are frightened to come forward.

I can honestly say my eyes were welling up but I also felt angry and disgusted. One of my mates had a sister who was raped when she was around 18, I knew her really well and it effected her for such a long time (and still does no doubt), such a lovely, kind, sweet person. She was a little drunk when it happened, that was it, nothing more, but this somehow in the rapists mind meant he had the green light to force himself on her, other drunk teens nearby just let it happen sad

As is clearly highlighted in this article and letter, rich people can and do get the best lawyers and investigators, this I feel already gives judges a better impression of them than they deserve. They also then basically act as if they are prosecuting the poor woman who has been raped for a crime, acting like they are the criminal rather than the person they are defending.

Then you see the usual excuses;

Male was heavily intoxicated
Female was even more intoxicated
Male was sure he heard the Female give consent
Female was wearing very skimpy clothing
Female was flirting
Female was dancing provocatively (that word should be banned!)
Etc etc

Everything is about blaming the woman for something, anything, THERE MUST be some reason why this wonderful law abiding man would do this.

How could you even be turned on to get an erection to even think about doing this to someone who hasn't given consent and clearly doesn't want it, let alone to someone unconscious.

Makes me ashamed to actually be a man.

Sorry for posting on your thread, I just had to say something. I hope this young lady manages to forgot that worthless excuse for a human being.

Felascloak Sun 05-Jun-16 18:59:33

6 months???!!!!!!!
Makes my blood boil. I feel she was very lucky those two men came across her because as she said, how was he planning to leave her.
What a disgusting excuse for a man he is.

Hrumphing Sun 05-Jun-16 19:18:30

Someone posted recently about what to teach a class of students in a PSHE lesson or something like that. Reading this would make a powerful lesson.
I hope she is able to find some peace.

CordeliaFrost Sun 05-Jun-16 20:19:40

Worth noting that he hasn't even got six months in prison, it's six months - of which he'll probably only serve three - in a county jail.

County jail is for holding individuals prior to trial, or for short-term sentences, and short-term sentences usually apply to non-violent, minor felonies.

Brock Turner has committed a crime that, if he had been sentenced properly, would have seen him serve his sentence in a medium or high security prison. However due to the shockingly inadequate sentence, he's going to be allowed to see out his time in a much 'cushier' county jail.

The whole thing is a disgrace.

Felascloak Sun 05-Jun-16 20:49:55

I just Googled him and there is a Facebook page campaigning for him to be able to swim at Rio, apparently he's a victim of a miscarriage of justice because only menhave to be responsible while drunk. The implication being that drunk men just can't help sticking their penis in people, even if they are unconscious on the floor, they must want it.
It reminds me of the Ched Evans campaign.
Sick fuckers angry angry

JeanGenie23 Sun 05-Jun-16 21:02:21

I read that this morning. Absolutely devestating. Such an eloquent piece, it brought tears to my eyes. I hope his supporters are ashamed of themselves. This victim blaming makes my blood boil. Why do so many seek excuses for famous criminals, I'm talking Ched Evans and Adam Johnson, they are the scumbags and should be treated as such, not the poor victims

Felascloak Sun 05-Jun-16 21:18:15

I can only think that women are acceptable collateral damage in pursuit of sporting glory sad sad
I also found a letter his dad wrote saying "[His sentence] is a steep price to pay for 20 minutes of action out of his 20 plus years of life"
Wonder where Brock got his attitude to women then.
I need to step away from the Internet, this is making me incandescent with rage

Felascloak Sun 05-Jun-16 21:18:57

Sorry forgot the link

NotMyRealName2015 Sun 05-Jun-16 21:22:36

Someone posted recently about what to teach a class of students in a PSHE lesson or something like that. Reading this would make a powerful lesson.

Absolutely agree. Her words are so poignant and moving, and the points made so well, it would be a fantastic teaching aid.

County jail is for holding individuals prior to trial, or for short-term sentences, and short-term sentences usually apply to non-violent, minor felonies.

I didn't know that. Sickening that anyone could think of this rape (or any rape for that matter) as a non-violent crime shock

NotMyRealName2015 Sun 05-Jun-16 21:26:35

Felascloak I forced myself not to google the name as I knew something would come up that would give me a blind rage.

"Only men have to be responsible when drunk' The implication being that raping someone is actually just a bit irresponsible i suppose angryangry

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