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Feminist Pub 16: where the Bluestockings develop armoured stockings to deal with the thousand paper cuts

(993 Posts)
FibonacciSeries Wed 14-Jan-15 12:39:22

<Polishes bar nervously, first time as publican>

Carry on.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Artifexmumdi Wed 14-Jan-15 13:17:06

Right, so, new year new start. Hot chocolate with a bit of brandy and espresso in please. The 2 under 2 are teething in tandem so am bleary eyed and not thinking very well.

I'm wondering about whether buggy sizes are a feminist issue. I usually carry DS in a sling and DD2 goes in the buggy. However, DS is getting too big for the sling and my back is not happy. I thought a folding double buggy would be the solution (due to bleary eyed ness) so I have borrowed one (Silver Cross Duo if it matters) from a friend. I was totally wrong.

The thing is fucking massive so if both children were in it, no buses EVER, it wouldn't fit down the aisles of my local shops so no shopping, wouldn't fit through library or gp surgery doors; the only place that might work would be local playgrounds and not necessarily all of those. So what bloody use is it?

I'm not sure how to relate this to feminism-maybe it is about how spaces are all designed for unencumbered people and those who are encumbered with small children or in wheelchairs or things like that are out of luck?

In any case, I just needed a disappointed rant. The solution I have come up with is now DD2 walks and DS goes in the buggy. But what I will do when DD2 gets tired, I don't know yet.

AnnieLobeseder Wed 14-Jan-15 13:34:09

How old is DS, and what kind of sling have you got? If he's old enough, I can highly recommend an Ergo or similar. I carried both mine in it up to age 3 and they are no strain at all.

Or get a buggy board for DD2 and put DS in the pushchair.

Double buggies are the devil's work!!

PetulaGordino Wed 14-Jan-15 13:38:17

thanks for the new pub!

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Artifexmumdi Wed 14-Jan-15 14:03:44

DS hates the Ergo for some reason. The girls didn't, but DS does. We have a regular old Obaby buggy with a buggyboard so yes, we'll be using that. I just hoped a double buggy would work, not sure why. I wish one could have a double buggy like my little travel buggy which even a dyspraxic like me can fold.

And yes, thanks fr new pub, Fibonacci, forgot my manners there.

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom Wed 14-Jan-15 14:06:13

Oooh, I can join in this conversation! (Don't feel I can add to the career stuff ATM being in career no man's land).

Double buggies are a nightmare. If you really need one, you need a stacking in line one like a Phil and Ted's. Other options are:

- baby in buggy and buggy board (we mostly did this)
- baby in buggy and toddler on your back when she gets tired (in an ergo, manduca or similar). A friend did this a lot
- toddler in buggy and baby in stronger sling (this can be swapped around with option 2).

Thanks for the new pub Fib!

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom Wed 14-Jan-15 14:07:48

Sorry, cross post there.

How old is your DS? Mine has only just accepted the manduca at 8 months.

YonicScrewdriver Wed 14-Jan-15 14:17:53


Yy to buggies. We borrowed a side by side double and it was useless for all practical purposes. Luckily by the time I was finished with ML for DC2, DC1 was happy to walk so we never had to find another solution.

AnnieLobeseder Wed 14-Jan-15 14:21:03


In Oxford.




YonicSleighdriver Wed 14-Jan-15 14:23:42


YonicSleighdriver Wed 14-Jan-15 14:24:29

Any way to make it work? 3 days from home and 2 in the office?

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AnnieLobeseder Wed 14-Jan-15 14:27:28

We're already committed to relocating to Cambridge. And I'm not commuting 2.5 hours each way any number of days of the week!

It's nice to be thought of though!!

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom Wed 14-Jan-15 14:28:20

Bugger, Annie sad

I take it that's not where you are relocating to.

YonicSleighdriver Wed 14-Jan-15 14:38:00

Annie, I was thinking an overnight stay between the two office days. Don't know if that would be possible.

kickassangel Wed 14-Jan-15 14:38:14

Oh - Annie! How frustrating.

Re: kids - they are HEAVY. I don't know why taking care of kids isn't seen as physically demanding. Due to poor after care from my c-section, I could never carry/lift dd for longer than a few minutes, so DH had to do all that. He felt like it was a work out

YonicSleighdriver Wed 14-Jan-15 14:41:09

Could you work it if you split time between the London Wall office, the Cambridge office and the Oxford office?

YonicSleighdriver Wed 14-Jan-15 14:42:26

Yy kickass - I always think post birth so many people just think about the baby and not the adult who just went through a medical and/or physical ordeal.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AnnieLobeseder Wed 14-Jan-15 14:44:49

Nope, I have small kids and we're moving so that I'm near to work with a short commute - I have spent the past 4 years neglecting my family and they come first now. Thanks for the ideas, they are good ones. But I'm such a junior there's no way any company would be making accommodations for me. Nor do I want them tbh - I hate long drives and commutes. I just needed to rant. grin

BreakingDad77 Wed 14-Jan-15 14:51:52

It was posted in Metro online of which its reporting is pretty ropey, but has come to light that an orthodox Jewish paper photoshopped all the women out of the unity march, crazy! found a bbc link -

YonicSleighdriver Wed 14-Jan-15 14:52:42

"But I'm such a junior there's no way any company would be making accommodations for me."

Please please don't assume this from the outset. I bet Mannie Lobeseder wouldn't smile

YonicSleighdriver Wed 14-Jan-15 14:58:32

Even if you can't take the job, is there any work you can do for them piecemeal? Can you take the role on a from home basis until they make a permanent appointment?

Did you interview for this a while ago?

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