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Feminist men / what can allies do

(39 Posts)

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

newbieman1978 Thu 06-Feb-14 17:02:02

There are some feminist men around, I'm one of them and clearly your husband is on board.

Power to the people whatevers between your legs!

CailinDana Thu 06-Feb-14 17:52:54

Well done your dh. It's practical things like that, however small, that make the difference.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Shufty Thu 06-Feb-14 18:46:16

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freyasnow Thu 06-Feb-14 19:11:13

I prefer feminist and dislike the term ally.

freyasnow Thu 06-Feb-14 19:15:05

I think any situations where somebody is being harassed and someone else speaks up to stop it,.

freyasnow Thu 06-Feb-14 19:20:43

Also domestic violence situations, particularly ones happening in public, where somebody immediately intervenes. I have seen that happen a few times.

And men who routinely cross the road at night rather than walk behind a woman.

freyasnow Thu 06-Feb-14 19:23:25

Also domestic violence situations, particularly ones happening in public, where somebody immediately intervenes. I have seen that happen a few times.

And men who routinely cross the road at night rather than walk behind a woman.

WidowWadman Thu 06-Feb-14 21:47:58

Until you quoted your husband I didn't realise the colleague was a woman - whilst his comment "I don't want to be part of such a stereotyped situation where the woman makes a drink for the men." at first glance is great, also could be understood to be a little bit patronising, couldn't it, even if it's not meant that way.

Really don't like the term ally.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pan Thu 06-Feb-14 22:23:20

Buffy, I wouldn't wish to entirely piss on this parade, but it isn't exactly amazing is it? It's just 'reasonable'. The visitor would have gotten the same message if dh just said 'I'll do it' without being so self-conscious about it. IF the woman knew him at all, she would prob. have thought, "yep, that's what he's like" and know why he did that thing.
There's no medals handed out for the " how you treat the receptionist" mode.

Am I being harsh there?

Pan Thu 06-Feb-14 22:25:21

and of course it should have just happened without him telling you about it.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AnyFucker Thu 06-Feb-14 22:30:10

When my H openly did the hmm reaction at a married male acquaintance's visit to a known sex tourism hotspot

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AnyFucker Thu 06-Feb-14 22:32:16

oooOOoo shiny gold star, it matches my nail varnish smile

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Pan Thu 06-Feb-14 22:35:36

<am sure AF's and her H's chart is already festooned!>

I thought I could be being a bit harsh and said so. And of course you're right about the stuff you say.

SauceForTheGander Thu 06-Feb-14 22:36:35

My DH asked for a no more page 3 t shirt and got it in pink. He was very boastful when I went off and protested about it too. When a friend of his said in disparaging voice "your DW is a bit rad fem" DH said proudly "definitely "

AnyFucker Thu 06-Feb-14 22:37:46

How about the bloke at work who wonders exactly why women would place themselves directly in the firing line of public vitriol for daring to say that a man might take advantage of his privileged position as a telly star to help himself to young girls ?

AnyFucker Thu 06-Feb-14 22:39:17

Pan, tell us what you would think of a married male acquaintances visit to a known sex tourism hotspot (actually, his second visit in a year) < not a trick question >

Pan Thu 06-Feb-14 22:40:57

A very mild example but last year me and another male colleague were discussing some work aspects of a female colleague (quite appropriately) and he said " I Don't want to be sexist, but.." and I cut in and said "Well in that case don't be. Continue." Conversation stopped.

PortofinoRevisited Thu 06-Feb-14 22:41:06

My DH leads the diversity team in his workplace. I still don't think he gets it 100% but he is getting there. I encourage things wink

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