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Feminism: Sex & gender discussions

AIBU to believe that this is a self-perpetuating cycle?

62 replies

KaseyM · 04/07/2013 13:08

Went to DS's school - received a booklist for over the summer which is split according to year and gender...

Looking at the books for DS's year group I see that the books "recommended by girls" have a mixture of girl AND boy protagonists whilst the boys' books are all about ... well.. boys.

Glancing around, the kids were dutifully reading from the list ascribed to their gender and I know that DS will likely be too embarrassed to pick one from the girls' side (although his favourite is on there) as they have hand in a review.

All this in mind:

AIBU to think this just perpetuates the cycle of girls reading about/watching boys but not vice-versa?

AIBU to think the school shouldn't have done this?

& AIBU to choose for DS myself - 1 about a boy, 1 about a girl and 1 about both?

I realise that's a lot of AIBUs!!

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kim147 · 04/07/2013 13:10

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BasilBabyEater · 04/07/2013 13:11

I think YANBU about any of the 3 dilemmas you pose.

God schools are shit on gender issues aren't they.

God they are shit.

In can't believe they're still doing mindless shit like this.

How shit.

That's all I can say really!

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KaseyM · 04/07/2013 13:20

Thanks Basil - it IS mindless shit isn't it!! And when I saw the list I had to snap into meditation-i-will-not-scream mode because I was with DM who wouldn't see the harm and think that I'm overthinking.

I love coming here to see I'm not overthinking.

Kim, sorry about DS not proper loving Brave. It is such a brilliant movie isn't it? I've seen it so many times, just for me....Blush

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kim147 · 04/07/2013 13:29

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kim147 · 04/07/2013 13:29

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Crumbledwalnuts · 04/07/2013 13:30

That's crazy - why do they even do a segregated book list? Completely ridiculous in this day and age!

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BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 04/07/2013 13:32

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KaseyM · 04/07/2013 13:34

Aaagh - I'm just looking through the book list - one of the girls' books seems really funny and the kind of thing DS would enjoy but it's in pink which he wouldn't read in a million because he'd be too embarrassed and mark him out for ridicule if he took it into school....

aaaaaghhhh - WHY OH WHY?!!!

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WoTmania · 04/07/2013 13:36

Oh FFS why? Why Why Why? Why not just have one reading list that the children can pick from? Why segregate? Gah!!!!!!!!!

YANBU

Write and complain. Idiot people (not you, them)

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WoTmania · 04/07/2013 13:36
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KaseyM · 04/07/2013 13:58

I know Wo! But I don't want to be seen as troublemaker cos it's a new school.... Blush I'm soft I know..

I have however successfully ordered 3 books that are a mixture. Kernowland: The Crystal Pool, Millions and Hostage - hope they're good...Smile

Now all I have to get DS to do is to read them, a trial at the best of times!!

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KaseyM · 04/07/2013 14:02

Just read your "strident anti-overthinking ist" Buffy Grin it's the rest of the world who "underthinks" things.

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BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 04/07/2013 14:31

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BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 04/07/2013 14:31

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grimbletart · 04/07/2013 15:20

Some things are such bat-arsed wankery that it makes you despair.

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BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 04/07/2013 15:21

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UptoapointLordCopper · 04/07/2013 16:11

I'm with the strident anti-overthinking brigade. Grin I would write to complain. Angry

DS1 said that his three favourites series of books are by women (though main characters are still male Hmm). He also likes Judy Moody books - main character is a girl!!

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YoniBottsBumgina · 04/07/2013 19:49

How old is he? Maybe we can make a whole new list which you could present to the school? Grin

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UptoapointLordCopper · 04/07/2013 20:58

Write to school: you are so happy that DS has been so happy in school etc etc, but you've notice the list! Surely it has not been the school's intention! Gendered lists limit the children's imagination. Surely this has been an accident! For example, school XXX down the road has a marvellous reading list (need to research here) and it's not gendered. And you yourself have found several books that are cross-gendered/gender-neutral which DS loves which you would never have found if all books were classified by gender! You know that the school is committed to gender equality and you are looking forward to working in tandem towards it! Smile

(Sorry, idea stolen from the let toys be toys campaign, and I've written a letter just like that too to a toy shop ...)

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BuffytheReasonableFeminist · 04/07/2013 21:07

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kim147 · 04/07/2013 21:13

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UptoapointLordCopper · 04/07/2013 21:19

I think there was a section in Delusion of Genders about classifying children as boys and girls - they did an experiment just classifying two classes of children randomly as the blue group and the red group. In one class they just left it at that, and in the other they made a big deal of it, like lining up in red and blue group. In the end they found animosity between the groups in the class where the distinction was emphasised. This is what we are doing to our children ... Makes me feel a bit sick ...

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Takver · 04/07/2013 21:25

Jesus, that is insanely crap in the 21st century. I really think you do need to say something. DD goes to the most out-in-the-sticks rural primary you could think of, and I genuinely can't imagine them doing this (in fact AFAIK all dc had to read every book on each shelf before being 'promoted', rainbow magic, beast quest, every pink'n'sparkly or macho-tastic one of them, regardless of sex).

I agree gentle tact is needed (rather than my friends WTAF reaction when we were shown a new logo at the PTA meeting with girl carrying book & boy carrying football Grin ), but you can't let it pass, surely.

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TheDoctrineOfAllan · 04/07/2013 22:28

If there's war between the sexes then there'll be no people left.

Or between the red and blue group, but it doesn't scan so well Sad

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CoalDustWoman · 04/07/2013 22:42

And still, we get people arguing about nature not nurture.

Society is fucked. We are going backwards at a great rate of knots. We seem to be in a bizarre situation where the laws are such that sexual discrimination is outlawed, but the outward forces towards gender determinism in childhood is greater than before the laws came in. I was a pup in the 70s - it seemed to be better for kids then, didn't it?

I despair. What the fuck happened? Why did "books for girls" and "books for boys" even get thought of as a concept in 2013. How limiting! Please raise it. We want our following generations to be well-rounded, don't we?

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