Advanced search

grrr asking a man to not use his phone in the quiet cartiage makes me a bitch appatently

(31 Posts)
FasterStronger Mon 25-Mar-13 13:38:14

I get on a train in the quite carriage and blokie appears to be having long conversation. Other passengers are sighing...

I ask him to continue the conversation in the vestibule. Immediately he starts calling me an f##king bitch.

I tell him he is rude and I dont care what he thinks. We do a slight squaring up. And repeat the same conversation a few times

Guard move him on. Other passengers thank me. Nice lady says I did the right thing and squeezes my shoulder.

What's wrong with male youth culture? He was so entitled. Poor young women.

I need to prepare for my meeting but will be back later.

runningforthebusinheels Sat 13-Apr-13 14:57:21


forcednamechange1 Sat 13-Apr-13 05:06:16

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

flippinada Sat 06-Apr-13 17:24:57

Yanbu (I know it's not AIBU but you aren't) and good for you standing up for yourself and other passengers.

Bet he wouldn't have spoken like that to a man.

BasilBabyEater Fri 05-Apr-13 17:33:20

Boredwench he was rude in the way he was because of his gender and the OP's.

He would not have said this sort of thing to another man, because he knows that the possibility of male violence being inflicted upon him is there.

Whereas women don't usually inflict violence on men who are rude to them.

(Men don't usually inflict violence on rude strangers either, but the possibility is there and the rude stranger generally has more respect for a man than a woman.)

Boredwench Fri 05-Apr-13 10:39:44

Of course not.....

Damm predictive text

Boredwench Fri 05-Apr-13 10:39:05

He was being insulting, hardly sounds like he had the mental capacity to realise he was actually partaking in some gender war. By insulting the entire male youth hardly covers oneself in glory does it? You know people are idiots irrespective of their gender right? Having a penis or vagina does not predispose someone is going to be an idiot, their mentality does. Are all women stressy nagging useless drivers? If course not.... That's absurd, the same as stereotyping every young male

SatsukiKusukabe Thu 04-Apr-13 14:42:37

well he did use a sexist word, so his gender is relevant.

amused by hair upthread feeling the need to play "devils advocate", why? Does every rude thing done need to be defended?

Boredwench Thu 04-Apr-13 10:50:28

Well done for standing up to a rude person.....

Not sure why you've stereotyped the entire male youth generation though... No need. He wasn't rude because of his gender, he was rude because he was an arse. Don't go looking for men vs women in every situation.....

TheDoctrineOfSnatch Mon 25-Mar-13 22:05:09

Calling someone a fucking bitch is really not on.

ibbydibby Mon 25-Mar-13 19:05:41

YANBU since you were in the quiet carriage - well done for saying something.

I was in non-quiet carriage last year (ie carriage where phones etc are permitted). Lady had phone convo, about some hobby club she had been to the previous evening. Phone was on speaker phone, so could hear every word said by the person she was speaking, as well as what the passenger said. A few other passengers were smirking, as it seemed an odd thing to do. All of a sudden, arsehole passenger stomps down aisle and asks lady on phone to turn speaker phone off. She explains she has hearing impairment and that is only way she can use phone. Arsehole stomps back to seat. Lady quickly ends call, then goes down to arsehole to explain she has hearing problem, can't hold phone to ear, and can't use ear piece. He will not have it and carries on being totally vile. She ends up saying sorry (again) and going back to her seat. It was truly awful. I wanted to hug her. In the end I went up to her and asked her if she wanted a tea or coffee, and she burst into tears.

MrsWolowitz Mon 25-Mar-13 18:56:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

kerala Mon 25-Mar-13 18:48:09

Using your logic hairtearing civilised society would break down. So all rules are void if an individual has something "important" going on in their lives? Really? So if Im in a hurry for a dentist appointment I can run a red light? If I have had a stressful day I can light up a fag in the school playground? Your post makes no sense.

OP well done. What an idiot (him not you). I admire people that stand up and say something in situations like this rather than sitting there taking it my dad is like this - brave. Without people like you these idiotic selfish bullies would have no checks on them whatsoever.

MooMooSkit Mon 25-Mar-13 16:49:10

I don't think OP was rude at all! Blimey it isn't hard to go to another carriage is it? There's signs everywhere and for the really stupid, mahoosive pictures of phones crossed out on it! Well done for standing up to him!

Thisisaeuphemism Mon 25-Mar-13 16:36:01

Maybe he didn't understand the word 'vestibule' and mistakenly thought she was telling him to fuck off smile

tribpot Mon 25-Mar-13 16:34:17

Having a loud conversation on the train in any carriage is wankerish behaviour but it is expressly forbidden in the quiet carriage. Big signs up everywhere.

OP does not say that she asked him in anything other than a civil manner to push off to the vestibule. He may not have realised he was in the quiet carriage (I am amazed by the number of times this happens, are people blind?) but all he had to say was 'sorry' and move. End of.

As an irrelevant aside, I was once on a train not in the quiet carriage and the woman next to me was having a quiet convo on her phone. At one point she turned to me and said 'Is this the quiet carriage?' I said no and she said 'then why is everyone being so quiet?' Err .. the opposite of the quiet carriage is not the Carriage of Enforced Noisemaking smile Although I suspect every train would benefit from such a thing.

And btw don't get me started on people who play their music without headphones on the bus and train. Hanging is too good for them.

specialsubject Mon 25-Mar-13 16:27:24

which part of 'quiet carriage' didn't he understand? There are even pictures of crossed-through phones for the functionally illiterate.

good for you, OP. Rest assured little boy will get what he deserves. Probably chlamydia. :-)

Thisisaeuphemism Mon 25-Mar-13 15:22:32

Eh, one person suggests another use their phone in the corridor, the other responds 'fucking bitch' and they are equally rude? How does that work out?

MrsSpagBol Mon 25-Mar-13 15:19:33

Hairtearing - are you actually serious? The train doesn't belong to any of the commuters but if he chose to sit in the quiet coach then he needs to follow the rules.

It's a quiet coach - you are not allowed to take phone calls in there? If it's an emergency get up off your arse and move into a different carriage?! There is usually only 1 quiet coach per train - so he had the rest of the train to take his calls in?

What do you think the point of a quiet coach is then?!

I am shocked you are trying to justify this!!!

FasterStronger Mon 25-Mar-13 15:12:08

Oh he was big talking about uni modules to his mate. If he was enquiring after his dying grandma, I wouldn't have said any thing.

He had a whole train with free seats he could have used.

He was just swinging his dick. Am on a different train now and someone is playing music, but its not the quiet carriage so their choice...

DaffodilAdams Mon 25-Mar-13 14:59:39

He was the one being rude and entitled by having the conversation there. If it was important he could have take it outside the carriage. There was nothing stopping him doing that.

Asking someone not to disturb others is not rude.

clam Mon 25-Mar-13 14:59:04

Doesn't everyone think that their own conversations/lives are important? Most of the time, though, others would disagree.

TheSmallClanger Mon 25-Mar-13 14:58:15

It isn't an opinion that you aren't meant to have phone conversations in the quiet carriage, it is a fact.

hairtearing Mon 25-Mar-13 14:57:27

you're all entitled to your opinion , as I am mine, it just seemed quite abrupt and rude in the OP.

Moominsarehippos Mon 25-Mar-13 14:56:04

Quiet carriage, people sighing and getting pissed off. I think the OP had every right to ask Big Gob to take his call outside.

TheSmallClanger Mon 25-Mar-13 14:50:48

It was the quiet carriage. There are signs up in those specifically telling people not to make phone calls. She was not being "entitled".

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: